Venting i'm lonely and can't sleep

[nails]

i have to sleep tonight because i have a big test tomorrow. it's not like it'll matter in the long run, but i'll feel worse if i don't do well.
i don't want to take my sleep meds. i haven't taken them in a while and i don't want to risk being drowsy tomorrow.

i can't shut my brain off. i'm really lonely, i have no one to talk to. everyone is either too busy, too miserable from their own issues, or don't really care that much. i've grown to hate seeing people being caring towards each other, it feels like i'll never receive the amount of care that i see others receiving. that extends to any kind of relationship, of course.
my life is over. i was planning to fuck around and screw up my life right before ctb, but i didn't even have to do anything; it all just happened on it's own. knowing that i'll be dead somewhat soon is the only thing that brings me any peace.

 

[Slark]

If you need someone to talk to, I can listen to you. Why are you thinking about CTB? I hope you do very well on your test tomorrow

 

[Regen]

I hope your test is well tomorrow. Sometimes I take only a little of my medication for sleep. The doctor say that this didn't work, but I am very sensitive for medication and it work also with very few mg. Did you try dpd oil? I don't try it but hear some good things about it. I hope you find peace in your head and you can sleep.

 

[danny10]

I know insomnia a little too well unfortunately. I hope you can sleep after your test.