I'm just so tired.

[CesiumBullet]

I wake up, I work, I come home, I cook dinner, I take my medications, I go to sleep. Rinse and repeat.

Even when I'm in between school semesters or jobs and have some time to myself, just having to wake up is absolutely exhausting. I wish I could have a break from consciousness. "Oh, I'm still here." Neuronal firing takes so much out of me. Sleep isn't enough. Why do I have to constantly be aware? I wish my consciousness could escape this body. Even to experience death temporarily would be so lovely, peaceful, restful, freeing. I suffer knowing I may have to wait another 70 years to finally have this curse lifted. Survival instinct is the only keeping me alive, and I hate it. Another consequence of our monkey brains stripping us of free will.

 

[Saponification]

Mmhmm. The feeling of waking up in the morning and knowing you're gonna have to put up with this shit world and the same stupid routine is exhausting.

Yeah, sleep is definitely not enough. I need my consciousness to disappear for the rest of eternity.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand, I also feel so tired of it all and I always suffer so much as a result of being conscious in this futile, torturous existence, all I want is to never suffer ever again, for me non-existence is the only peace and is all I see as desirable, I hope you find the relief you search for.