I'm going to kill myself today

[ilistentoradiohead]

It's Sunday, 14 April, and as I am currently typing this its 11.35 AM. I'm at the airport and about to fly back home since school is starting tomorrow.

Since a few days ago, too much things has happened and I cannot take it anymore. I don't care if you think this is dramatic. Too many things has happened and I don't want to keep living with the same problems everytime I visit my family, it's always the same thing over and over again. I'm fucking sick of it. I slowly lose my affectkon for mt family although they have done nothing wrong to me. I just hate my fucking dad so much. Like I know he cares for me but he doesn't listen to me for fucking shit nor does he try to hear me.out and understand me and I don't want to keep living with that for the rest of my life and be burdened by it. I thought things had gotten better yesterday but no, the same shit happens again today and I have made a final decision; once I arrive back to my own place where it's just me alone inside my room, I'm going to take those sleeping pills and overdose in them. I don't want to see what am I going to wake up to tomorrow morning. I accidentally left my earphones at my grandma's place and was looking forward to buy a new replacement tofay, but I no longer want it anymore. I don't aant to ever wake up and listen to music again, although that's the only thing keepinge alive this whole time I'm sick of it. I don't want it anymore. I want to just die in my sleep and never wake up again. God, that wpuld be so much more peaceful than jumping off the train and letmyself die that waym I can't do this anymore.

To my friends, I am terribly sorry. I love you qll.
To my mom, I'm sorry. I love you.
To my brother, I hope you grow to be a kind and nice person. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you anymore.
To my grandma, I'm sorry. I know you sent me well wishes for my flight, but I wouldn't be seeing you anymore. Please stay healthy.

I will be arriving back to my place at around 4 pm. And by then, I am already dead. I won't wake up anymore. I just don't want to. Please give me the strength to do so.

11.44 am.

 

[Dliena]

I hope you find the eternal peace you desire and no more hurt again.

 

[hug]

It's Sunday, 14 April, and as I am currently typing this its 11.35 AM. I'm at the airport and about to fly back home since school is starting tomorrow.

Since a few days ago, too much things has happened and I cannot take it anymore. I don't care if you think this is dramatic. Too many things has happened and I don't want to keep living with the same problems everytime I visit my family, it's always the same thing over and over again. I'm fucking sick of it. I slowly lose my affectkon for mt family although they have done nothing wrong to me. I just hate my fucking dad so much. Like I know he cares for me but he doesn't listen to me for fucking shit nor does he try to hear me.out and understand me and I don't want to keep living with that for the rest of my life and be burdened by it. I thought things had gotten better yesterday but no, the same shit happens again today and I have made a final decision; once I arrive back to my own place where it's just me alone inside my room, I'm going to take those sleeping pills and overdose in them. I don't want to see what am I going to wake up to tomorrow morning. I accidentally left my earphones at my grandma's place and was looking forward to buy a new replacement tofay, but I no longer want it anymore. I don't aant to ever wake up and listen to music again, although that's the only thing keepinge alive this whole time I'm sick of it. I don't want it anymore. I want to just die in my sleep and never wake up again. God, that wpuld be so much more peaceful than jumping off the train and letmyself die that waym I can't do this anymore.

To my friends, I am terribly sorry. I love you qll.
To my mom, I'm sorry. I love you.
To my brother, I hope you grow to be a kind and nice person. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you anymore.
To my grandma, I'm sorry. I know you sent me well wishes for my flight, but I wouldn't be seeing you anymore. Please stay healthy.

I will be arriving back to my place at around 4 pm. And by then, I am already dead. I won't wake up anymore. I just don't want to. Please give me the strength to do so.

11.44 am.

I don't know your name, but I know what the pain of not being understood is, in fact I don't understand this pain, but I know who knows, my brother. I lived my life being compared to him, he was practically the black sheep of the family, he fought with his father and mother his whole life, now, I can't talk to him anymore, because I did a lot of shit, I did something That I regret for the rest of my life, now what keeps me standing and finding him, because I lost him. The only person who loves me in this world, now I'm not worthy of anyone's love. But you are still worthy, if you are here and because someone loves you, before leaving, hug your mother, hug your father, and hug your brother very tightly, write the letter and only then can you leave. It's very sad to leave as if you never existed, you still exist, I will only exist when I find my brother.

 

[february in alaska]

I'm so sorry about your situation. Please be careful with the method you're using (OD'ing on sleeping pills), I've heard it's VASTLY unreliable and often nonfatal, but it can leave a lot of lasting damage and unnecessary pain... I'm assuming the pills you're talking about are over the counter too? Please make sure you know what you're doing first. My heart goes out to you stranger, I hope you're able to get to a better place regardless of what you decide <3

 

[justcallmeJ]

Goodluck, i hope you find the peace you wanted <3

 

[UKscotty]

Good luck

 

[LunarLight]

I feel for you. However, OD'ing on sleeping pills is not gonna work. You'll most likely end up in a psych ward. Be aware of that.

A Caution About Drug Poisonings (ODs) and Cutting

Preamble I see a lot of posts on this forum mentioning drug poisoning and/or cutting/stabbing as a method of choice. I want to caution these methods for a few reasons. I respect the right to choose any method but I'm concerned that those using these methods may not be fully informed on the...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[joeschmo]

It's Sunday, 14 April, and as I am currently typing this its 11.35 AM. I'm at the airport and about to fly back home since school is starting tomorrow.

Since a few days ago, too much things has happened and I cannot take it anymore. I don't care if you think this is dramatic. Too many things has happened and I don't want to keep living with the same problems everytime I visit my family, it's always the same thing over and over again. I'm fucking sick of it. I slowly lose my affectkon for mt family although they have done nothing wrong to me. I just hate my fucking dad so much. Like I know he cares for me but he doesn't listen to me for fucking shit nor does he try to hear me.out and understand me and I don't want to keep living with that for the rest of my life and be burdened by it. I thought things had gotten better yesterday but no, the same shit happens again today and I have made a final decision; once I arrive back to my own place where it's just me alone inside my room, I'm going to take those sleeping pills and overdose in them. I don't want to see what am I going to wake up to tomorrow morning. I accidentally left my earphones at my grandma's place and was looking forward to buy a new replacement tofay, but I no longer want it anymore. I don't aant to ever wake up and listen to music again, although that's the only thing keepinge alive this whole time I'm sick of it. I don't want it anymore. I want to just die in my sleep and never wake up again. God, that wpuld be so much more peaceful than jumping off the train and letmyself die that waym I can't do this anymore.

To my friends, I am terribly sorry. I love you qll.
To my mom, I'm sorry. I love you.
To my brother, I hope you grow to be a kind and nice person. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you anymore.
To my grandma, I'm sorry. I know you sent me well wishes for my flight, but I wouldn't be seeing you anymore. Please stay healthy.

I will be arriving back to my place at around 4 pm. And by then, I am already dead. I won't wake up anymore. I just don't want to. Please give me the strength to do so.

11.44 am.

Sorry but no. Strength to do it over an argument with someone you can easily escape from and never hear from again? No way.
This site isn't meant for pushing absolutely everyone (for ANY reason) into suicide. And especially if you are a minor (not sure if you are, just saying in case you can't escape form your father due to being under 18). If you are a minor you call 911 for child abuse, you won't hear from him again.

My point is simple, don't get rid of yourself, get rid of those who make you feel that way.

Also, pills? Ever thought about the possibility that you won't die but instead end up in a vegetative state? Plenty of failed attempts that ppl ended up regretting.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope that you find freedom from your suffering.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Good luck. I hope you find peace. Farewell!

 

[theboy]

RIP

 

[green eyes]

good luck I really hope you manage to find peace <3

 

[AllMyDreams]

I don't know much about pills but I would listen to people on here if they say pills are unreliable/could lead to nonfatal damage.

Also, if at any point during the process you have regret or second thoughts, call help.

If you've thought this through and are 100% sure, I hope you find peace.