Help I'm going to a psychiatrist tomorrow.

[DevonBostick'sAss]

I've been ignoring going to a doctor for a long time because my old doctor once told me " Why do you want to be sick" " Why do you act like this" Etc. It really hurt me and broke my trust to doctors. I feel bad and I want to fix it and you ask me why i want to be diagnosed?
Plus If i get diagnosed that will mean the pain and the suffering I've been enduring is real its something.
I really am nervous about going to the doctor. I've written what will I say cause i only have 15 minutes to explain myself. I dont want anyone to misunderstand me or my situation.
I was thinking about talking about my self harm history but a lot of people warned me about not telling them about my current self harm. So I will just do that.

I dont know if i should tell my mom if they give me a medicine. I once used birth control and didn't told her and she was mad mad. I want to tell her but all she said to me for 20 years was " You are not sick dont act sick" So im not sure. What do you guys think?
This is the note that i will share with my doctor if anyone is curious:

Hello,
I would like to share some important things about myself. I previously went to a child psychiatrist and was prescribed Concerta. However, even at a high dosage, neither I nor the people around me noticed any changes. Since I was close to turning 18, I couldn't continue my treatment.

Until 12th grade, I engaged in self-harm. I no longer actively harm myself, but when I experience triggering events, I feel the urge to do so. However, I resist and do not act on it.

My mood changes very quickly, and this affects everyone around me. For me, an event is either completely good or completely bad—there is no in-between.

Even when I experience happy moments, I keep thinking that this feeling won't last. I try to get through the feeling of happiness as quickly as possible, as if I shouldn't be experiencing it fully.

Previously, when I told a psychologist that I believed something was wrong with me, they responded with questions like, "Why do you want to be sick? Do you want to be diagnosed with something? Why are you looking for a problem within yourself?" This reaction prevented me from seeking professional help for a long time. But now, I truly believe that what I have been experiencing is not normal, and if someone else acknowledges this, at least I will have an explanation for everything I have been going through and feeling.

These issues are important to me and make my life difficult. I want to learn how to cope with them by getting the right help."

By the way will it be weird to read these to doctors face to face?

 

[Rymrgand]

By the way will it be weird to read these to doctors face to face?

Psychiatrists and therapists are used to treat patients who have problems expressing their problems, so no, it's not weird. In fact, they may appreciate it, since that means that you are cooperative. I would consider it a red flag if they think it's weird.

I dont know if i should tell my mom if they give me a medicine. I once used birth control and didn't told her and she was mad mad. I want to tell her but all she said to me for 20 years was " You are not sick dont act sick" So im not sure. What do you guys think?

You know your mom better than us. Is she opposed to medication? Do you think she would do something to you? If she stops you from taking your meds, that's clearly abuse and you should tell your psychiatrist (or damn, even the cops. Sadly, if you are still living with her, I don't think they would will be able to do anything).

If your only fear is that she will say something rude to you, you can tell her, I guess. As I see it, she is already being rude to you.

Good luck.

 

[DevonBostick'sAss]

Psychiatrists and therapists are used treat patients who have problems expressing their problems, so no, it's not weird. In fact, they may appreciate it, since that means that you are cooperative. I would consider it a red flag if they think it's weird.


You know your mom better than us. Is she opposed to medication? Do you think she would do something to you? If she stops you from taking your meds, that's clearly abuse and you should tell your psychiatrist (or damn, even the cops. Sadly, if you are still living with her, I don't think they would will be able to do anything).

If your only fear is that she will say something rude to you, you can tell her, I guess. As I see it, she is already being rude to you.

Good luck.

She doesn't believe that im sick or something is wrong with me. Even she uses prozac so shes not against a medication unless its me i think i will call her and inform but im scared. Since she doesn't believe anything is wrong with me she doesn't want me to use anything

 

[Rymrgand]

She doesn't believe that im sick or something is wrong with me. Even she uses prozac so shes not against a medication unless its me i think i will call her and inform but im scared. Since she doesn't believe anything is wrong with me she doesn't want me to use anything

Well, you are an adult. And your psychiatrist, the one who will tell you to take meds, is a professional who knows way more than her. She is entitled to her opinion, but what you do is not her problem.

Still, if she is abusive and has power over you (you are living with her, for example, or you depend economically), I would understand if you want to lie to her to keep a (fake) good relationship.

I can't take this decision for you,vI would need more information about your mother and your relationship with her. But I can tell you that you are right about wanting to improve yourself and she is the one in the wrong. And she obviously doesn't care about you, if she doesn't want you to get professional help.