I’m finally going to do it

[flownthecoop25]

Due to the loss of my wife a little over a year ago, I'm finally going to end it on Saturday. I can't go on in this world as it is without her. For twenty years I always had her at my side. The loneliness is too much to take. How could I ever be with anyone else? To think that my grandpa outlived three wives is mind boggling. Maybe it's because he had kids that he managed to soldier on. We had no kids because it just wasn't possible, so what is the point? I just exist now, and cannot enjoy things I used to love. I tried working more, but I can't stand the BS of work. I have tried exercising but the endorphins only work while I'm exercising. As soon as I come home, it's back to the emptiness. I am not going to find someone else in my 50s. How could I ever find another like my soulmate? I just want to thank everyone on this forum for giving me the courage to end this nonsense once and for all. I never posted before, but I have been reading the threads. There are lots of people going through worse things, and I wish I could give a hug to everyone that needs one. Hopefully I don't go to hell for my actions, but at this point I'll take my chances. It's not like I'm hurting anyone else, it's a personal decision. Take care everyone and God Bless.

 

[karakoltriste]

I'm sorry for what you have suffered and I hope you find peace.

 

[darksouls]

Due to the loss of my wife a little over a year ago, I'm finally going to end it on Saturday. I can't go on in this world as it is without her. For twenty years I always had her at my side. The loneliness is too much to take. How could I ever be with anyone else? To think that my grandpa outlived three wives is mind boggling. Maybe it's because he had kids that he managed to soldier on. We had no kids because it just wasn't possible, so what is the point? I just exist now, and cannot enjoy things I used to love. I tried working more, but I can't stand the BS of work. I have tried exercising but the endorphins only work while I'm exercising. As soon as I come home, it's back to the emptiness. I am not going to find someone else in my 50s. How could I ever find another like my soulmate? I just want to thank everyone on this forum for giving me the courage to end this nonsense once and for all. I never posted before, but I have been reading the threads. There are lots of people going through worse things, and I wish I could give a hug to everyone that needs one. Hopefully I don't go to hell for my actions, but at this point I'll take my chances. It's not like I'm hurting anyone else, it's a personal decision. Take care everyone and God Bless.

I am so sorry for your loss
it must be very painful to lose your soulmate
sending you hugs and love

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you find peace from suffering, I wish you the best.

 

[bankai]

I don't think you'll go to hell. I don't think anyone else can understand your suffering. I definitely feel it's pretty profound. I'm so sorry. It's definitely more difficult to find someone as you get older

Please don't feel so alone if you're going to take the bus. Reach out to me if you want to. I'm so sorry.

 

[SleepyTransit]

I hope you find your way to your wife peacefully. Safe travels and were always here if you miss the bus.

 

[glitterycheese]

I hope for even in that point you feel safe and at peace with yourself. May you fly high.

 

[WakingNightmare]

Really tough circumstances you're facing mate, I hope you can find peace with whichever way you decide to proceed.

 

[a-fond-farewell]

This reminds of me of the song Real Death by Mount Erie. It really captures the emptiness and reality of grief very well. I'm so sorry you're going through this right now.