Venting I'll always wish for permanent non existence

[ijustwishtodie]

Life is absolutely awful to me and always will be until I die. For every second that I'm alive and not sleeping, I am suffering. I always wished that I could die at a young age so that my total cumulative suffering spent on earth decreases in comparison to the alternative scenario where I survive on. However, of course dying isn't easy to do for me hence I'm trapped here but I will always crave non existence until I actually get it. Life was never meant for me to begin with as I always felt unattached with life ever since I was born. However, what is meant for me is death as it's only in death where I can't suffer

 

[iloverachel]

Same my friend

 

[FuneralCry]

I do as well, I'd be so relieved if I had the option to peacefully cease existing, I'm not meant for something so hellish and futile as existence, existing has only ever caused me to suffer. For me death truly is the only peace, it's beautiful to think of being permanently unconcious, I envy those who die.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I do as well, I'd be so relieved if I had the option to peacefully cease existing, I'm not meant for something so hellish and futile as existence, existing has only ever caused me to suffer. For me death truly is the only peace, it's beautiful to think of being permanently unconcious, I envy those who die.

I envy those who die as well. They are the true fortunate ones... though of course the best fate somebody can have is to not be born at all. Existence is truly futile and exhausting

 

[Dayrain]

I read the title first in the thread list and expected to see FuneralCry's pfp next to it. Anyway, I agree.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I do as well, I'd be so relieved if I had the option to peacefully cease existing, I'm not meant for something so hellish and futile as existence, existing has only ever caused me to suffer. For me death truly is the only peace, it's beautiful to think of being permanently unconcious, I envy those who die.

I envy those who die as well. They are the true fortunate ones... though of course the best fate somebody can have is to not be born at all. Existence is truly futile and exhausting with no reward or purpose at all.

I read the title first in the thread list and expected to see FuneralCry's pfp next to it. Anyway, I agree.

I don't blame you. I relate a lot to FC and I basically have most of her mindset on my existence. She's the person who I relate to the most

 

[Dayrain]

I don't blame you. I relate a lot to FC and I basically have most of her mindset on my existence. She's the person who I relate to the most

I agree. I'm very thankful she is here. I have the utmost respect for her.

 

[LaughingGoat]

I imagine you have mentioned it in another thread, but why are you trapped here and unable to die?

 

[Papa Shinai]

Same here, I wish not to exist despite living a decent life. I have no serious traumas yet I still wish to disappear. Life was unnecessary from the start.

 

[hopeless08]

Life is absolutely awful to me and always will be until I die. For every second that I'm alive and not sleeping, I am suffering. I always wished that I could die at a young age so that my total cumulative suffering spent on earth decreases in comparison to the alternative scenario where I survive on. However, of course dying isn't easy to do for me hence I'm trapped here but I will always crave non existence until I actually get it. Life was never meant for me to begin with as I always felt unattached with life ever since I was born. However, what is meant for me is death as it's only in death where I can't suffer

I'm sorry you've suffered all your life.
In my case I've had depressions on and off, never like this one though but what I want to say is that I experienced happiness, beautiful moments, amazing times in my life and actually I say to myself I wish I never experienced happiness that way I wouldn't know what pain and suffering is like, if that makes any sense