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sif

sif

You deserve love
Dec 28, 2018
373
Agreed good post, you said good and bad so I would've missed out on the handful of amazing people I've met and the music I've heard, but on the other hand would've missed every single miserable feeling and moment. Every year is similar so considering the differences of if I did it sooner or later aren't very important. When I'm dead I'm dead and I won't even be thinking about how I'm no longer suffering.

If I died naturally or something a year ago, I'd miss out on a lot of heartache and suffering.
I'd miss out on new friendships I've made through the pain, and maybe a few key mental insights about myself
I'd miss out on watching myself become my worst enemy
+
 
Fcancer

Fcancer

Student
Sep 24, 2018
184
I would have missed out on getting cancer a 2nd time, my partner leaving me, losing my job, losing my house, advancements in my depression, anxiety, and ptsd to the point of no return.

Damn this year was amazing. Can I do it again please, I didn't quite have enough fun the first time.
 
خوف

خوف

Fallen Angel
Jan 7, 2019
17
The only wonderful thing that has happened this past year was that I met the only and the most beautiful person who's pure inside and out.

I wouldn't say that he's like me but he is me but in a male version. I feel like our souls are the same, that they are twins.

But he's gone and after a long while, I ended up letting go...

Everything else that has happened was awful, constant suffering and misery. My meeting with him was the only lovely thing that has happened. I can't say that I wish I died a year ago as I'm still not sure.
 
Midnight

Midnight

Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
624
I would have missed out on getting cancer a 2nd time, my partner leaving me, losing my job, losing my house, advancements in my depression, anxiety, and ptsd to the point of no return.

Damn this year was amazing. Can I do it again please, I didn't quite have enough fun the first time.

I'm baffled that you're still arround. You are one tough person. Obviously you are here for a reason but still...
 
not_a_robot

not_a_robot

"i hope the leaving is joyful, & never to return"
May 30, 2019
2,121
A bit of peace, a bit of laughter, a lot of anxiety and some sheer fucking horror.
Very afraid for the next few years what will happen if I don't ctb, eventually an abusive care home and total loss of independence if I wait too long. Trying to squeeze through a couple decent years then ctb before they imprison me.
 
Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,705
The Stones show in Warsaw - it was another great one. A reunion with a longlost friend. My cats finding new confidence because I was hospitalized for three weeks almost dying and they had to get used to other people. Almost dying of co2 retention (the dreams were fantastic!). Getting rehabilitated. Finding this fine forum. Buying a house.

It's been lively.
 
Last edited:
Ko9

Ko9

Student
Jun 30, 2019
159
Good: A couple of songs by artists I love, a couple of videos and movies and a bunch of art I made and saw being made by artist I love.
Bad: My dad yelling at me that because of me he his existence became a lot more excruciating. And the status quo of my mental health which is almost crippling.
 
not_a_robot

not_a_robot

"i hope the leaving is joyful, & never to return"
May 30, 2019
2,121
Good: A couple of songs by artists I love, a couple of videos and movies and a bunch of art I made and saw being made by artist I love.
Bad: My dad yelling at me that because of me he his existence became a lot more excruciating. And the status quo of my mental health which is almost crippling.
Parents who say kids fucked up their life: nobody told you to fuck without a condom and force a child to be born.
Own your mistakes.
 
Ko9

Ko9

Student
Jun 30, 2019
159
It is a bit more complex, I mean if an afterlife exists I will go to hell but my dad is also pretty fucked up. This is pretty offtopic but my dad was mentally and physically abused as a kid but some things defiantly passed onto my childhood. He had many anger attacks, beated me but that was like 3% of the time. He was a pretty good dad the rest of the time. On the other hand: my brother has never been a problem for my mom and dad. So it was easy to pass the blame of their problems onto me and I doubt they are wrong.
 
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Feline Fine

Feline Fine

Member
Jul 5, 2019
22
Nothing good, it would have been the perfect time for me. All I would have missed is months of terror over what the DWP will do to me, and a year of watching my body ruin itself.
 
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M

Miserable

Student
Jul 14, 2019
117
*sigh* nothing good. A year ago I thought I wasn't good enough for my gf but I still thought she loved me. She realized I wasn't good enough and now she's gone. It would have been nice thinking I had found real love at least.
lol I just wrote a post about how i never cry and now I'm crying.
I've been sick leave the entire year. Spent Christmas in jail which only helped to destroy what little family I had left. I've become a fat pig too, just nothing to do and the meds I guess.
A whole year and it was worth nothing.
I helped my mom quite a bit, there's that I guess
 

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