i don't think humans are meant to feel this lonely, so dissociated from everything and to go says without talking to someone face to face. why is it that i've gotten so pathetic that i get jealous of people that can talk to each other in a call playing games or to plan irl meetups?
wanting to have your needs fulfilled is not pathetic <3<3<3
while i tend to wake up to no one even messaging me sometimes since they're all busy with their own lives. it's so easy for everyone else to say "enjoy your own company!!! someone else will enjoy it soon :)"
it is factually possible to have someone else enjoy your company even if you don't

but i cant even feel comfort in it anymore considering it's been going on for four years now.
that sounds rlly rough .... ♥
i'm just sick of having to do nearly everything alone to the point i have no drive to play video games or stay on my laptop, its just a reminder that I'll never be a normal social person.
i can understand the drive to engage in other things being dulled by loneliness ♥. i don't think it's necessarily a permanent state, though; i think it's more of a fear of it not resolving, than any kind of "realization, reminder, revelation", it's a prediction and a concern by the brain, and i think it's resolvable

it is painful though and your pain is real, i feel it is possible to have this need fulfilled and this pain soothed and eased

from the simple fact that connection
is possible; even when seeking it can sometimes be a journey in itself~ but good company even can be found along that way too
your average house pet will be treated with so much love and care, even if they've come from a neglectful home there'll be someone to feel upset and hurt for their well-being. the ones in the wild have too depend one each other for survival whatnot, if animals aren't meant to be isolated then why is it okay for people? i feel envy towards anyone who's able to feel comfortable with being alone i wish i could be that same person but it's just recently started to get to me
i agree; animals are not meant to be isolated, and nor are humans ♥♥♥. i think a LOT more people claim being "comfortable alone" than there are in truth. a lot of people who outwardly claim they are "comfortable alone" still struggle from loneliness inside, and a lot of the time that outlook is a way of theirs for dealing with connection struggles.
it's not your fault that it is hurting you <3<3 it's just human biology that we feel hurt from feeling we don't have connection, attachment, social access et cetera in our life
here are some posts i wrote for some advice on loneliness and connection

It has been nearly three months since I last posted about how lonely I am. Since then, my feelings of loneliness have only increased and I have failed to maintain any new connections despite trying my best. I think it's time for me to accept that there really is something fundamentally wrong...
www.sanctioned-suicide.net
I think I’m running out of methods to help me cope or at least distract myself enough from this overbearing loneliness, which I feel. I know that for a lot of ppl (prob not on here, but in general), loneliness and the feelings that come with it are hard to comprehend and might seem superficial...
www.sanctioned-suicide.net
I think I’m running out of methods to help me cope or at least distract myself enough from this overbearing loneliness, which I feel. I know that for a lot of ppl (prob not on here, but in general), loneliness and the feelings that come with it are hard to comprehend and might seem superficial...
www.sanctioned-suicide.net
wishing you the best

. there
is presence of love and connection in this world, more than enough for you too, and there is a way to find yourself in the currents of it too

. i am wishing you all the love in the world, and may you find yourself in the best of company in the times to come ♥.
