Venting I wish I never told anyone about my depression

[Trakehner]

"Talk to someone"
"Go to therapy"
"You're not alone"

It's all lies.

I wish I could go back in time and never tell anyone about my problems. It's costed thousands of dollars. Nobody understands how I feel and nobody is going to help me. I've been on so many different drugs with horrible side effects that only make me feel worse.

I've completely ruined any chances of having a normal life. I'm permanently ostracized from everyone I knew. They all think I'm crazy and most people have abandoned me.

But there's nothing I can do now. I'll have to live the rest of my life with this shame. It's all becoming too much to bear. I need to die soon but am terrified about fucking it up again and being in an even worse situation. What the fuck did I do to deserve this?

 

[FuneralCry]

It certainly is cruel how people have to suffer so much in this existence with no straightforward way to die in peace, I find it horrible how people even have to fear trying to die going wrong in the first place, we shouldn't have to struggle so much to finally be free from this dreadful existence. But anyway I hope that you eventually find the freedom you search for.