I wish had a gun

[Butterfly-death]

It seems like the best method to me. I know it's not perfect but no method is. SN is too hard to get and idk how to get it in the first place. Hanging is terrifying to me and I think I weigh too much to do it. Jumping is scary asf and I don't think I could find somewhere high enough to do it. Exit bag is too complicated and kinda hard to get the stuff for it. Other methods are either hard to get the supplies needed or it's not researched enough for me to want to attempt it.

Guns are so expensive and I don't know the process of getting one

I feel trapped in this hell. It only gets worse. I'm so tired of suffering.