I was raped and I can't live with it

[Pidgeons_Sparrows]

)::: some people really are disgusting monsters man

 

[WaitingToGo]

So pleased you feel a bit better. I can't imagine the things you went through and to be let down by your ex Was just dreadful. Of course this will stay with you for a long time but I hope you will eventually find some peace. Sending big hugs from across the pond

 

[StolenLife]

I'm sorry that this happened to you. This world is truly fucked up. I don't believe in karma but I sure do hope that both bastards get served some justice.

 

[unnormal9]

I was also raped—by my trauma and once during my 3 year psych hold. I have repressed it so because the thought of it makes me writhe in agony. What sickens me the most is that I am assumed to have wanted and enjoyed it simply because my body reacted during the moment.
Enough.

 

[Kattt]

I'm not going say you will get over this or that it will get easier because those are just platitudes and lies.
The thing is, when someone uses our kindness as weakness and targets in such a way, it is something that many people simply never recover from.
Many victims of such crimes rightly say that they would rather have been killed as having to relive the torment on a daily basis is not at all a simple thing to do and often impossible.
One thing to consider is this. Rape is not about sex. It is entirely a crime of power. The criminal takes all power from the victim and has likely been abused themselves and/or in some way deprived of any power, being dominated at every turn. Of course, this in no way excuses the devestation they have wreaked upon you. Whether you deal with this through legal means or not is up to you. But either way, I really do suggest that you speak to someone from a rape crisis helpline. It is always in confidence and they cannot pass on any information to law enforcement or otherwise. However, talking to somebody you feel you can trust in, is definitely a way to help straighten up the thoughts in your mind that must be driving you crazy.
The other thing that you should consider is that this person caused a terrible scar upon your mind and body that day. These will never be forgotten, but you can choose whether their crime will also include the taking of your life and/or the destruction of the rest of your life. Those things are entirely down to you and how you choose to deal with iti know that it may not, at this point, feel so simple, yet in time, perhaps this is something that might make a little more sense to you.
Before that though, your life and welfare cone first and whatever that may take to make each day liveable.
I hope you can become a survivor and not another victim and a statistic. It takes a hell of a lot of bravery. But many rape victims do not have this option. Their attacker decides that it is to dangerous and risky to leave a witness and so their life ends there and then. You have been given this choice, although right now, it might not feel like such a great blessing. Do you have someone in your life that you can trust to support you? If not, again I urge you to contact rape support. You are very far from the first to endure this horrific crime and someone who understands what you have been through, could be just what you need.
Good luck to you.

 

[ever so lonely]

i am so sorry op , i am sorry you have had to endure this pain, and anybody that goes through this, these bastards truly deserve death imho, they have no place in a modern civilised society, i am ashamed of the fact these unwashed urchins still exist among us, i hope you can heal op , if you want a chat with anybody here or any support please there plenty of people here who maybe have experienced similar, i am amazed at how often this happens, it is truly disgusting, i just hope your ok op, sending hugs, there is nothing i despise more in this existence than sex offenders, rapists and peados, even inside they have to segregate them from the rest of the prison population apparently, which says even amongst hardened criminals and other felons they are considered the lowest of the low, please reach out to people op, either here or out there, there may be support groups in your area, i hope you get the support you deserve my friend, sounds like you have been through hell and back, god bless to you and everybody here suffering

 

[HopefulSleep]

I hate this world so much that innocent people like you get tortured like that and then people question us why we want to commit suicide

 

[failingthroughlife]

Hi loves, I hope you don't mind my constant updates but it really helps me to get things out. Recently I have been seeing someone new and It was making me feel so good about myself and helping me to get through the hard times. He messaged me this morning to tell me he's met someone else and he's seen her everyday. I have spent the past week thinking I'd done something wrong and I've been beating myself up.
I feel so so stupid because I slept with him, following what happened to me I was terrified to sleep with anyone and I honestly thought this would go somewhere which is why I decided to do it and now I regret it. I just feel like I am not good enough for anyone, I'm always the girl they meet before they find 'the one' and i'm just left behind. He said he couldn't see me last week because 'how can I see a girl everyday and then just tell her its over' but he was seeing me everyday. How come he can do this to me and not her. I just feel like such a fool for believing someone could like me in a way thats not for sex. I think its the only thing im good for at this point