I took my SN yesterday. Willing to answer questions

[Wannagonow]

Ok, so this guy says he took two and a half tea spoons. That's around 10.5 grams which is less than half of the recommended 25. However, 10.5 grams is still enough to put the average person in the hospital, @icetea15 wound up in the hospital with just two grams. The way SN works is it is both a strong oxidizer and a strong vasodilator. It converts hemoglobin into methemoglobin and also dilates your veins which drops your blood pressure drastically. It's also a cumulative effect as more and more of your blood becomes unusable to transport oxygen to your tissues. You don't just wake up from that and instantly go onto a suicide forum to tell everyone about your nifty SN attempt. This post is bogus.

I absolutely agree!

 

[Nanako]

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/using-nitrate-instead-of-nitrite.28365/

Oh. I see.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/using-nitrate-instead-of-nitrite.28365/

I have lab grade sodium nitrite. 99%.
Not table salt. Thank you.

I absolutely agree!

That's fine. You're perfectly welcome to your opinion. Doesn't change my reality whatsoever.

 

[👁️👃👁️]

Ok, so this guy says he took two and a half tea spoons. That's around 10.5 grams which is less than half of the recommended 25. However, 10.5 grams is still enough to put the average person in the hospital, @icetea15 wound up in the hospital with just two grams. The way SN works is it is both a strong oxidizer and a strong vasodilator. It converts hemoglobin into methemoglobin and also dilates your veins which drops your blood pressure drastically. It's also a cumulative effect as more and more of your blood becomes unusable to transport oxygen to your tissues. You don't just wake up from that and instantly go onto a suicide forum to tell everyone about your nifty SN attempt. This post is bogus.

I mean.. idk there were a few people who did wake up hours later and came on to tell their story. One of them whom I trust personally. Not sure what went wrong I don't remember.


But yeah, I'm skeptical of all of these posts. Especially @idkanymore21
I don't know man it's just with all the attention from these families and from The New York times, it would make sense that there would be people that would make accounts and come on here and lie about failed attempts to try to scare people thinking that they're going to help them by doing so.


I don't know why I keep getting involved in these threads anyway. The brand that I'm using there has not been one failure with that I'm aware of. If you Google sodium nitride the brand that I'm using is all over Google images.

I'm almost 100% certain it's going to work, but there is always that fear of what happened to OP.

OP I don't know what the hell is going on either way I'm sorry life brought you to this point and you're going through all of this.

 

[Nanako]

All I'm saying, OP, is that your situation is extremely unprecedented. You just ingested a fair amount of a very powerful poison, did not vomit it, and now woke up feeling relatively well. I can't call you a liar because ultimately I don't know you. But you realize how crazy this is right.

 

[👁️👃👁️]

@LookingOverTheEdge
Why do you have phone calls to make? Did you schedule goodbye letters or something?

 

[Himalayan]

Yoooo. Didn't see you in a while Rasputin.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

All I'm saying, OP, is that your situation is extremely unprecedented. You just ingested a fair amount of a very powerful poison, did not vomit it, and now woke up feeling relatively well. I can't call you a liar because ultimately I don't know you. But you realize how crazy this is right.

I don't feel relatively well. My mind is working. My body feels pretty bad. I've never claimed I feel 'well'. Only that I've woken up, which I have. And really wish I hadn't.

Like I said, I love this place. It's been the only place where I feel I can talk freely and openly about something that people generally don't want to hear. If I can provide any contribution or knowledge that may help people understand things, then that's my way of giving back for a place that's helped me in so many ways. That's all.

You're welcome to be skeptical. I just ask you refrain from outright insulting me. Imagine you were in the position I claim to be in at this moment. How would that feel?

 

[aforestfire]

As I said. My body definitely wanted to throw up. I still that as well. But I didn't, and I'm fairly sure I'm not the only person who's reported that as a symptom. Different people are affected in different ways I guess

I still feel very strange. As previously said I'm finding it difficult to move around a lot. My body feels very weak and sort of strained if that makes sense?

I'm not going to the hospital. That's my worst fear, being involuntarily held. In an ideal world I would hope I'm not out of the woods yet and I might still end here, but honestly I don't think that's the case now.

as unbelievable this whole thread sounds, and if it's true, i hope you recover from the attempt well. i'm sorry it didn't worked how you planned.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

@LookingOverTheEdge
Why do you have phone calls to make? Did you schedule goodbye letters or something?

Because there is someone close to me who knows exactly how my mind is and how this depression has held me for a very long time. And I think they knew that today was going to be different. I was speaking to them when I took the SN. I described to them how I was relaxed, and calm, and warm, and in a very peaceful state. I wanted to try and make things easier for them.

I've caused them a lot of pain, and I hate that, I truly do. But my pain matters to, and I'm so tired of it. I was ready yesterday. That should have been the end of it.

as unbelievable this whole thread sounds, and if it's true, i hope you recover from the attempt well. i'm sorry it didn't worked how you planned.

Me too. And yes I know it's hard to accept, I'm still getting my mind around the whole thing. My body feels pretty bad. I'm struggling to support myself at the moment so I'm now just lying down on my sofa. I do also think that I might vomit at some point but I'm trying very desperately not to do that.

Honestly I'd really like it if this wasn't over and it still does what it should have done but I think at this point I have to accept that this hasn't worked.

 

[DreamEnd]

do you know how much sn you took in grams?

 

[Cathy Ames]

That's it! So tired of hearing failure stories it's scaring me! I'm done! I'm not drinking SN anymore! I'm gonna boof it!

In case you weren't being funny on purpose, I apologize for laughing. Holy cow, I am so tired of it here. Why... Just why.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

do you know how much sn you took in grams?

I don't. I took about two and a half tea spoons, ground it up with the bottom of the spoon, and tipped it into a small amount of water. Which I then knocked back like a shot.
I was trying not to think of the taste, but honestly it wasn't as bad as I expected. You could definitely taste 'chemical', I don't know how to explain that better. I can still taste some of it and the back of my mouth now.

 

[Cathy Ames]

I'll go back and read and delete if already asked, but what was the brand (initials are fine), and when did you buy it, and how sure are you about the blood test results. This sounds like a similar case as the person who may have taken the incorrect substance despite it coming from the reputable place.

 

[👁️👃👁️]

I'll go back and read and delete if already asked, but what was the brand (initials are fine), and when did you buy it, and how sure are you about the blood test results. This sounds like a similar case as the person who may have taken the incorrect substance despite it coming from the reputable place.

I didn't believe @idkanymore21 thread at all. Whatsoever.

 

[Cathy Ames]

When you say 2.5 teaspoons, are you talking about a U.S. measuring teaspoon or something else? And about how much water? It's very odd that you didn't experience something incredibly salty tasting.

IDK where you live, but a US measuring teaspoon holds approximately 5 mL. Also, you should take down the picture, as it's against rules (although I appreciate seeing it... it looks like it "should" be the correct thing).

 

[NoLightRemains]

How much do you weigh in kg? I'm surprised that someone could down what I'm guessing is around 10g of SN and live.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

When you say 2.5 teaspoons, are you talking about a U.S. measuring teaspoon or something else? And about how much water? It's very odd that you didn't experience something incredibly salty tasting.

I'm from UK. So a standard uk teaspoon I guess. But it wasn't like a teaspoon of standard salt, the stuff was fairly clumpy and with a yellowish tint. So it was big chunks that I then ground down with the bottom of the spoon.
It did taste salty of course. And there was definitely a strong chemical taste that I can't quite explain. Reminded me of an aquarium at the time, I remember thinking that. But I didn't find it as unpleasant as I've read about.
I remember once drinking a glass of water containing quite a bit of normal salt for a dare when I was younger. I don't feel like this was as bad but that was a long time ago and I was in a very different mindset. I cannot emphasise enough how ready I was and how much I wanted this

How much do you weigh in kg? I'm surprised that someone could down what I'm guessing is around 10g of SN and live.

I weigh about 70kg. Maybe a touch less at the moment as I haven't been eating well or often

 

[hungry_ghost]

I believe you, and don't believe that you have any ulterior motives.

Anything is possible, even surviving SN.

There are risks with every method.

This method was never 100% fool proof, so no need for people to get upset hearing this.

I feel it's just an informative post, and to take it or leave it.

People will still choose to go out using SN regardless.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

I believe you, and don't believe that you have any ulterior motives.

Anything is possible, even surviving SN.

There are risks with every method.

This method was never 100% fool proof, so no need for people to get upset hearing this.

I feel it's just an informative post, and to take it or leave it.

People will still choose to go out using SN regardless.

Thank you. I would point out that I've not tried to scare anybody here. I've not talked about unbearable pain or anything like that. I was very calm the whole time.
The worst part by far was the tachycardia, I fully understand how that could scare someone into calling for help. But I found it tolerable, and remained calm by telling myself that this was normal and it wouldn't matter for much longer.
I didn't pass out as quickly as I was expecting to, but I think that's because I was very aware of all the different feelings that were taking place in my body. When I did go, I think it must have been very sudden.

 

[Nanako]

I believe you, and don't believe that you have any ulterior motives.

Anything is possible, even surviving SN.

There are risks with every method.

This method was never 100% fool proof, so no need for people to get upset hearing this.

I feel it's just an informative post, and to take it or leave it.

People will still choose to go out using SN regardless.

But it is fool proof, unless you don't take a high enough dose, or mix it with too much water, or vomit. OP likely either botched the method or is lying.

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

I will say this. I don't feel very good right now, physically or mentally. I'm trying to be as calm l, focused and factual as I can.
I don't think it will be long before the depression takes hold again. And when it does, I still have SN, and I would use it again. Maybe not so suddenly. And I may try to get hold of an AE but that's been very difficult for me.

But it is fool proof, unless you don't take a high enough dose, or mix it with too much water, or vomit. OP likely either botched the method or is lying.

People have been reported waking up from N, which is the good standard. Nothing is fool proof. Especially death it would seem, unless you have a shotgun or are willing to lie in front of a train, which I definitely don't have in me.
I've been as honest as I can be. I didn't follow the regimen to the letter, but I believe I did enough bearing in mind that 5g is supposed to be lethal, and I would have taken much more than that.
It's fine for you to be skeptical, I think that's very wise in a place like this. But I've nothing to gain from this, I've just tried to give my honest experience so people know how it went for me, and what I felt. Up to you what you do with that, but again, no benefit to me either way. I'm still here and my reality is still ahead of me. Today will not be a good day

 

[👁️👃👁️]

View attachment 102529

I've had it for about two years. It has been stored carefully and safely, and I only broke the seal about a month ago. I'm as certain as can be that it is what it's supposed to be.
If nobody has any more questions I think I may be about to go fall apart now. SI is a terrible thing, and to get to a point where that finally didn't matter anymore and now to wake up like this. I have a lot to process. I'm feeling a lot of conflicting emotions

There you go that's the problem this brand is garbage. There's already been three or four other people who failed with it in the past.
You bought it off of Amazon. They have another label with the yellow and blue sticker if I'm not mistaken.
Don't beat yourself up. That brand is garbage. I'm sorry you're going through all of this.
@Mofreeko
The brand they used is garbage. I've seen numerous threads of people who failed with it. Someone even did a blood test and the blood test passed but people were failing from it. I remember this exact brand. They were one of the last ones on Amazon. One of their stickers had like a blue or yellow label on it. It's garbage.
Please nobody ask me to show them the threads because I'm not about to put four or five hours in the using that search function to find them. You can either believe me or you don't I really don't give a shit.

 

[Nanako]

I hope the one I got is trustworthy. It's from a reputable source and it came in a very fancy bottle so it must be...? lol

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

There you go that's the problem this brand is garbage. There's already been three or four other people who failed with it in the past.
You bought it off of Amazon. They have another label with the yellow and blue sticker if I'm not mistaken.
Don't beat yourself up. That brand is garbage. I'm sorry you're going through all of this.

I didn't get it off Amazon. I bought it from a private seller on another site which I can't seem to find anymore. The experience was basically what I was expecting, minus the waking up part. Surely poison is poison right? I'm definitely feeling rough in the aftermath of it.
I appreciate the kind words though. Right now I feel like I thought I'd woken up from a dream but it turns out I'm still in the nightmare you know?

 

[System28]

hope you feeling better, my opinion is your sn was adultered less purity if is not easy acessible on uk makes sence

 

[LookingOverTheEdge]

hope you feeling better, my opinion is your sn was adultered less purity if is not easy acessible on uk makes sence

Thank you. I don't feel great but I think my body will recover before too long; the mind is a very different story

hope you feeling better, my opinion is your sn was adultered less purity if is not easy acessible on uk makes sence

Thank you. I don't feel great but I think my body will recover before too long; the mind is a very different story

When you say 2.5 teaspoons, are you talking about a U.S. measuring teaspoon or something else? And about how much water? It's very odd that you didn't experience something incredibly salty tasting.

IDK where you live, but a US measuring teaspoon holds approximately 5 mL. Also, you should take down the picture, as it's against rules (although I appreciate seeing it... it looks like it "should" be the correct thing).

I have deleted it. I didn't realise it wasn't allowed. I apologise

 

[StringPuppet]

Thank you. I don't feel great but I think my body will recover before too long; the mind is a very different story

Thank you. I don't feel great but I think my body will recover before too long; the mind is a very different story

I have deleted it. I didn't realise it wasn't allowed. I apologise

Can you post the initials of the brand you used? I think posting the initials is allowed. I hope it's not LW

 

[freedompass]

It is a horrific feeling. I was calm, and I was ready. I knew what was happening in my body and I accepted it. To wake up after that, is pure torture.

How so? You're here typing calmly enough? Don't appear to have suffered greatly like the person who posted yesterday? Are you referring to emotional torture?

At this rate there'll need to be a designated 'creative writing' section devoted to failed SN attempts…

 

[👁️👃👁️]

I didn't get it off Amazon. I bought it from a private seller on another site which I can't seem to find anymore. The experience was basically what I was expecting, minus the waking up part. Surely poison is poison right? I'm definitely feeling rough in the aftermath of it.
I appreciate the kind words though. Right now I feel like I thought I'd woken up from a dream but it turns out I'm still in the nightmare you know?

You may not have purchased it directly off of Amazon but that exact brand was sold on Amazon. It's garbage.