I think the day arrived to ctb: tomorrow

[GasMonkey]

See you on the Other Side.

 

[blue_muse]

I hear you on life. When there are too many factors to overcome, it defeats the purpose of living. You sound like you're merely cutting your losses. I'm sorry for your suffering and wish you a peaceful transition .

 

[lebrodude]

Are you still with us OP?

 

[clockwork_cat]

You loved your job..why do you want to ctb exactly? Like do you know why you're so joyless? My job is one of the reasons I want to ctb it's hard to imagine loving a job whatsoever though, so I'm just curious.

Have you played the cat lady?

 

[I wish I were a cat]

Have you played the cat lady?

Oh my! I haven't heard of it til now, I'll play in the weekend I think. Thanks

 

[lebrodude]

Think this user may be gone…..
Now you can rest

 

[Source Energy]

Update: I got delayed. Couldn't do it that day, and the next day I lost everything. Spent two weeks trying to fix it and reaching out to the only person who could help me. I can't bear being awake anymore, I am losing my mind.
Started the food fast. Is 11-12 hours going to be enough?

Think this user may be gone…..
Now you can rest

Not yet, still here. Got delayed with something. But in the morning I do it - unless for a miracle. Started the fast...

 

[dimstar]

12 hours is good enough. Last bit of advice I can give. Sorry it's to this point and the struggles of the other days. Hope you find peace, were always here for you. Will be feeling for your energy❤

 

[Source Energy]

Anyone else feels a crushing pain in the heart, and difficulty breathing before even taking the SN? I've been feeling severe chest pain for weeks, as if all my chest was being crushed under a mountain, and strong jabs in my heart. It's gonna be over quickly.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Anyone else feels a crushing pain in the heart, and difficulty breathing before even taking the SN? I've been feeling severe chest pain for weeks, as if all my chest was being crushed under a mountain, and strong jabs in my heart. It's gonna be over quickly.

I'm sorry you have to go through all this suffering and that life brought you to this point. I was never so close to the point where you are now, tbh, but it sounds like a very early form of SI. I have my method (CO) ready when my time comes and I have to say, when I think deeply about the process and imagine it in my mind, how the last steps, I would have to perform, will be, I get strange feelings, although I'm not so close to the real action as you are now.

I wish you all the best and a peaceful journey! May you find freedom and peace on the other side!

 

[Vizzy]

Update: I got delayed. Couldn't do it that day, and the next day I lost everything. Spent two weeks trying to fix it and reaching out to the only person who could help me. I can't bear being awake anymore, I am losing my mind.
Started the food fast. Is 11-12 hours going to be enough?

Not yet, still here. Got delayed with something. But in the morning I do it - unless for a miracle. Started the fast...

Yes fasting 11-12 hours is enough

Anyone else feels a crushing pain in the heart, and difficulty breathing before even taking the SN? I've been feeling severe chest pain for weeks, as if all my chest was being crushed under a mountain, and strong jabs in my heart. It's gonna be over quickly.

sorry that's not due to sn, some other issue in your body and hope you find peace

 

[dimstar]

Anyone else feels a crushing pain in the heart, and difficulty breathing before even taking the SN? I've been feeling severe chest pain for weeks, as if all my chest was being crushed under a mountain, and strong jabs in my heart. It's gonna be over quickly.

Yeah I've felt it. When it first started before I realized what it was I felt like I needed to rip my heart out. I feel that again when I'm particularly close to the edge. I think its ctb urges and si fighting. Deep breaths do what you can to be peaceful. I mean really deep breaths.

 

[Source Energy]

Yeah I've felt it. When it first started before I realized what it was I felt like I needed to rip my heart out. I feel that again when I'm particularly close to the edge. I think its ctb urges and si fighting. Deep breaths do what you can to be peaceful. I mean really deep breaths.

I'm worried about feeling suffocated tomorrow. I spent the last days perusing SN gbye threads. Most passed out in 5-10 mins, but no further details. I'm scared. Will it feel like being smothered?

 

[Vizzy]

I'm worried about feeling suffocated tomorrow. I spent the last days perusing SN gbye threads. Most passed out in 5-10 mins, but no further details. I'm scared. Will it feel like being smothered?

no suffocation in sn, you will feel like your heart racing after taking sn but it ain't that bad

There are thread with further details , I guess you didn't see it

Below is thread

goodbye thread - today 10:00 pm (UTC +2)

Today the time has finally come, I have my final exam. I will finally find out whether I have learned the right thing and can actually apply it. At least the part about being relaxed seems to fit, I'm completely relaxed and hardly think about tonight. Let's see how it develops. I am pursuing...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[Source Energy]

no suffocation in sn, you will feel like your heart racing after taking sn but it ain't that bad

There are thread with further details , I guess you didn't see it

Below is thread

goodbye thread - today 10:00 pm (UTC +2)

Today the time has finally come, I have my final exam. I will finally find out whether I have learned the right thing and can actually apply it. At least the part about being relaxed seems to fit, I'm completely relaxed and hardly think about tonight. Let's see how it develops. I am pursuing...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Thank you, I guess I didnt see all of it, but I read all 10 pages the search got me. I need it to be easy, I suffered hell already

Oh, I did read this one. One of my fav threads. May he rest in peace

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I'm worried about feeling suffocated tomorrow. I spent the last days perusing SN gbye threads. Most passed out in 5-10 mins, but no further details. I'm scared. Will it feel like being smothered?

The feeling of suffocation is caused by being unable to release carbon dioxide. SN ingestion doesn't prevent you from flushing it out. So as far as I understand it won't feel like that, at least as far as suffocation is generally understood.

 

[Vizzy]

Thank you, I guess I didnt see all of it, but I read all 10 pages the search got me. I need it to be easy, I suffered hell already

Oh, I did read this one. One of my fav threads. May he rest in peace

He passed away same day he wrote this thread and it is confirmed in the forum by his friends that he is dead

 

[dimstar]

I'm worried about feeling suffocated tomorrow. I spent the last days perusing SN gbye threads. Most passed out in 5-10 mins, but no further details. I'm scared. Will it feel like being smothered?

I'm sorry for your experience. But like vizzy said you wont feel suffocated. Most people do pass out quickly. Are you using any benzos? That can help with the anxiety and make losing consciousness faster. Sorry friend

 

[Source Energy]

I'm sorry for your experience. But like vizzy said you wont feel suffocated. Most people do pass out quickly. Are you using any benzos? That can help with the anxiety and make losing consciousness faster. Sorry friend

No benzos but something that puts me to sleep anyway. Starting the water fast

 

[dimstar]

How you doing @Source Energy ? I hope your feeling calm and things go smoothly for you. Sending some of my energy your way❤

 

[helplessufferer]

i feel like OP took SN by now, i hope everything was smooth and peaceful <3

 

[Source Energy]

How you doing @Source Energy ? I hope your feeling calm and things go smoothly for you. Sending some of my energy your way❤

Trying to have a convo with someone in real life. Doesn't really go thru. People can be so blind to other people's pain. Just laying here in limbo. Not eating, but not ready to complete ctb until the issue is talked through. Thank you, I need good energy coz mine died out

 

[dimstar]

Trying to have a convo with someone in real life. Doesn't really go thru. People can be so blind to other people's pain. Just laying here in limbo. Not eating, but not ready to complete ctb until the issue is talked through. Thank you, I need good energy coz mine died out

I'm glad you have someone to talk to even if its falling on deaf ears. You dont have to do anything unless your sure your ready, sn will still be there. Hope your convos go well but dont expect too much from other people you'll only be let down.

 

[Source Energy]

I'm glad you have someone to talk to even if its falling on deaf ears. You dont have to do anything unless your sure your ready, sn will still be there. Hope your convos go well but dont expect too much from other people you'll only be let down.

It's not much a convo. It's me trying to explain myself and apologize and the person being deaf to it. We are both hurting each in their way. I have my little bottle and measuring glass by the nightstand, I stopped eating, my heart throbs...It is just this situation that holds me here while pushing me in the same time. It's agony

 

[Source Energy]

I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me
I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me

If I am not back with an update in 48 hours you can delete my account.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me

Have a pleasant journey! I hope you find peace & freedom on the other side!

 

[Letgo]

Wishing you peace and rest. Thinking of you.

 

[Jezzibell]

I wish for you everlasting peace, and I really hope that it will be easy and comfortable for you. Virtual hugs. X

 

[Crono]

I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me
I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me

If I am not back with an update in 48 hours you can delete my account.

Good luck, I hope it's quiet and you can go in peace.

 

[canaryblue]

I'm taking SN in 20 mins. Took Ibuprofen 40 mins ago 60 grams. Now I'm taking sleeping pills. Hope for my eternal rest and that nothingness awaits me

You're making me cry safe travels!