I think I'm gay and I can't accept myself... please help.

[edu0z]

Hello, my name is Lorena. It's not the original name of the body, just the name I identify with within the system. We have a thing called Dissociative Identity Disorder. Normally it is Eduard who always has control of the body but he is very depressed so I have come out. The fact is that I have a theory that I have told the psychologists and they confirm that I could be right.

I am the oldest personality, I have existed since the body is 9 years old(A little later was when the very basic suicidal desires began). Around that time was when I started to like boys (Eduard likes girls and I like boys). Eduard emerged much later as a defense mechanism. I think I'm gay, since I was a child I always have been. But because of the circumstances, because of the social pressure, and because of that of my parents and friends: I have never been able to accept myself.

This has led our brain to create two personalities as a mechanism to be able to deal with the situation and understand it. It has taken us to a point where it is impossible to maintain a stable relationship since he likes girls and I like boys and we can not control when each one comes out. It's not like being bisexual, I wish I was bisexual, no. It's as if one day you were completely in love with a girl and then the next day you wake up and leave her because you started to like the boys (only the boys) and then that same afternoon your attraction to women comes back and you regret it.

I think I'm gay, but I can't accept myself, I can't accept myself. And that makes us very unhappy. What can I do? I've never been with a guy, I don't know if I'll be able to tell my friends and my parents... I don't know what to do, I'm very desperate.

 

[Snake of Eden]

tbh i dont think anyone here can help you in that regards. Your case seems very delicate and rare. I rather you consult a professional than ask for advice online.

 

[orange]

Hey, sorry that you're going through this, it does seem like a complicated situation. All my knowledge abt DID comes from DID YouTubers tbh, and y'all seem rlly different from system to system. Idk if you were already aware of these resources, but I used to watch YouTuber called multiplicityandme. They're married, so there must be a way to reconciliate all those complicated feelings :) gl!

 

[soverytired]

Hello, my name is Lorena. It's not the original name of the body, just the name I identify with within the system. We have a thing called Dissociative Identity Disorder. Normally it is Eduard who always has control of the body but he is very depressed so I have come out. The fact is that I have a theory that I have told the psychologists and they confirm that I could be right.

I am the oldest personality, I have existed since the body is 9 years old(A little later was when the very basic suicidal desires began). Around that time was when I started to like boys (Eduard likes girls and I like boys). Eduard emerged much later as a defense mechanism. I think I'm gay, since I was a child I always have been. But because of the circumstances, because of the social pressure, and because of that of my parents and friends: I have never been able to accept myself.

This has led our brain to create two personalities as a mechanism to be able to deal with the situation and understand it. It has taken us to a point where it is impossible to maintain a stable relationship since he likes girls and I like boys and we can not control when each one comes out. It's not like being bisexual, I wish I was bisexual, no. It's as if one day you were completely in love with a girl and then the next day you wake up and leave her because you started to like the boys (only the boys) and then that same afternoon your attraction to women comes back and you regret it.

I think I'm gay, but I can't accept myself, I can't accept myself. And that makes us very unhappy. What can I do? I've never been with a guy, I don't know if I'll be able to tell my friends and my parents... I don't know what to do, I'm very desperate.

I feel for you a lot because my best friend ever had DID among many other things. It's hard to say what you should do because I don't know your environment. You could be overthinking it but you could be right as well. Don't you have at least one friend that most probably would accept it and wouldn't reveal it to anyone else?

 

[fragmented_part]

This isn't everything, but do you have anyone you can talk to about what's going on/how you feel? I know it's hard with multiple things intersecting (ie sexuality/did/family opinions), but I found that for everything I have going on (trans/mental health issues/substance use/etc.) even just talking about it to someone who is willing to listen even if they don't understand helps me put my thoughts in order. Also, just throwing spaghetti at the wall, but do you think some form of polyamory or ethical non-monogamy could work for you? It may seem like "even more" to deal with on top of sexuality, but I guess it sounds like you're saying "I can't operate in the framework of a typical monogamous relationship right now" and it's valuable I think to recognize that that's not the only way to operate or structure your relationships. Finally, I know it's hard, but two over arcing things to do are you try to understand clearly what the things are that you are getting from your family and friends and then think about how you might get them another way, and to think about what the beliefs are you have that keep you from excepting yourself, and then trying to be very careful with looking at what actual evidence there is to support or deny that belief. I hope something in what I said helps you find a new direction to pursue, but in any case I hope you can find some peace and acceptance.

 

[ContinuousJump]

I don't know what to do, I'm very desperate.

Lorena. Eduard.

If someone came along and was able to give you the perfect advice, amenable to all of you, what would that be?

I think I'm gay, ... I've never been with a guy

One possibly might be for all of you to give yourself the chance to explore that. At least then all of you might have a better understanding of the complete situation.

Also, it might take a few, different trials at it before all of you can really know.

Are there any LGBTQ+ support centers/groups anywhere near you? If you can, join a group and get to know some gay people. You can make sex a second step, after you get some gay friends.

I don't know if I'll be able to tell my friends and my parents...

This should be a consideration for the future. Your sex life is your business, not theirs. You have a lot of exploration and learning to do for yourself, first.

but I can't accept myself, I can't accept myself.

If you're gay, that's 100% OK.

And I accept you.

 

[chocolatebar]

Like @zeroornothing said, we're not the best people to help you with your problem, but we can offer you company and hospitality like you will find nowhere else.

 

[Midgardsorm]

Any case of DID is very delicate and needs to be addressed carefully.

Thankfully, there are people that can help in this case scenario. Let's hope they find a way for you both to make peace with each other.

You stated that your told your theory to the psychologists, so they are already helping you. Let's see what you can achieve from this.

I don't have DID, I have not studied anything about it, frankly, my help is very limited. There are members here with DID. I am not allowed to speak about them. I'm sorry.


Your name in the birth certificate is the name of your body.
We do not know which one of you was born. Obviously, the one born in your birthday is the older one. If you existed since the body were nine, you might not be the older. But you might not remember either.

One video I saw from YouTube had a story of a woman body that had multiple personalities. Thankfully for her all of them were females. But an interesting thing is that they communicate with each other through a diary.

Maybe writing helps you to some extent? At least so you can chat with each other if you can't already.


I'm sorry. This is very difficult. You obviously can't start liking one gender or another.

Hopefully you find some comfort here. Many have found.

I wish you the best.

 

[Round Two]

Hello, my name is Lorena. It's not the original name of the body, just the name I identify with within the system. We have a thing called Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Hey, Lorena. I can't say I'm an expert, but I've had a few friends with DID over the years. I'm also trans and just queer in general. So...not an expert, but I am comfortable calling myself experienced. If you'd believe it, I was in a somewhat similar situation when I was in my teen years. I couldn't accept myself as a woman, so I created an alter ego of myself to cope. This wasn't DID, mind you--I want to make that super clear. This was just playing pretend to make my feelings easier to process, which is totally different, obviously. Anyway, it worked. I was able to channel that femme energy and be myself, so it was really freeing. Like you, I was in a place of not being able to accept myself. Like you, I had tons of pressure from those around me to conform. My former family is ultra-religious and would have tossed me out on the street if they knew the truth. I may not understand your exact situation, but it does resonate with me.

Fact is, when we can't accept ourselves, it has nothing to do with us. I'll repeat that for emphasis; you not being able to accept yourself is not on you. The reason we have difficulty with that is the entire reason you decided to mention friends and family in the first place; it's expectations mixed with consequences. Society, in general, expects you to be a certain way. And, in turn, so do the people around you. There's fear there--fear that if people found out who you are, they'd just pack up and leave, or worse, lash out.

I don't tell people this, but there came a point in my life where there was a clear choice to make: I either had to move forward in life as myself or kill myself. The pain was unbearable. I was living a lie, and I just couldn't stand it. I could feel every single second of every single day ticking by and thinking, "What the fuck am I doing? My time is running out. Am I going to die without taking even one authentic breath? Am I going to die with a dude's name on my tombstone?". Well, the answer was no.

I'm not here to tell you it's all sunshine and rainbows. Life isn't that simple. And, if it were, I probably wouldn't be here on this website writing this in the first place, right? Accepting yourself won't change the darkness of life, but it will change the way you experience it. I can tell you, from the other side, that its worth it. Straight people don't have persistent gay thoughts. They don't agonize over it. They don't become desperate over it. They don't make posts online to a bunch of people at the ends of their ropes about it. Look inside yourself and be honest. This is your life, no one else's. Not your family's not your friends'--yours. Live it as yourself until you can't. That's my advice.

If you ever need someone to talk to, hit me up.

 

[edu0z]

Hey, Lorena. I can't say I'm an expert, but I've had a few friends with DID over the years. I'm also trans and just queer in general. So...not an expert, but I am comfortable calling myself experienced. If you'd believe it, I was in a somewhat similar situation when I was in my teen years. I couldn't accept myself as a woman, so I created an alter ego of myself to cope. This wasn't DID, mind you--I want to make that super clear. This was just playing pretend to make my feelings easier to process, which is totally different, obviously. Anyway, it worked. I was able to channel that femme energy and be myself, so it was really freeing. Like you, I was in a place of not being able to accept myself. Like you, I had tons of pressure from those around me to conform. My former family is ultra-religious and would have tossed me out on the street if they knew the truth. I may not understand your exact situation, but it does resonate with me.

Fact is, when we can't accept ourselves, it has nothing to do with us. I'll repeat that for emphasis; you not being able to accept yourself is not on you. The reason we have difficulty with that is the entire reason you decided to mention friends and family in the first place; it's expectations mixed with consequences. Society, in general, expects you to be a certain way. And, in turn, so do the people around you. There's fear there--fear that if people found out who you are, they'd just pack up and leave, or worse, lash out.

I don't tell people this, but there came a point in my life where there was a clear choice to make: I either had to move forward in life as myself or kill myself. The pain was unbearable. I was living a lie, and I just couldn't stand it. I could feel every single second of every single day ticking by and thinking, "What the fuck am I doing? My time is running out. Am I going to die without taking even one authentic breath? Am I going to die with a dude's name on my tombstone?". Well, the answer was no.

I'm not here to tell you it's all sunshine and rainbows. Life isn't that simple. And, if it were, I probably wouldn't be here on this website writing this in the first place, right? Accepting yourself won't change the darkness of life, but it will change the way you experience it. I can tell you, from the other side, that its worth it. Straight people don't have persistent gay thoughts. They don't agonize over it. They don't become desperate over it. They don't make posts online to a bunch of people at the ends of their ropes about it. Look inside yourself and be honest. This is your life, no one else's. Not your family's not your friends'--yours. Live it as yourself until you can't. That's my advice.

If you ever need someone to talk to, hit me up.

Being a girl in a man's body makes me feel truly miserable. But the worst thing is having to keep pretending that I am Eduard when I go out so that the others do not suspect... He tells me that it's okay, that he's not ashamed of me... but I don't see myself with enough courage to be myself in public... I think you are a very brave person :)

I want to be a girl, I have projects and goals but that's what I want most in this life since I'm little... At the time of school I fall in love with a girl, but it was a rare thing. More than sexually, I fall in love with the affection she gave me (she was my best friend)... Then analyzing the situation, I think it was not really that I liked her as a couple, but that I WANTED TO BE HER.

I would really like to hear your experiences, if it does not bother you of course... but I don't know why I can't write to you privately.

Any case of DID is very delicate and needs to be addressed carefully.

Thankfully, there are people that can help in this case scenario. Let's hope they find a way for you both to make peace with each other.

You stated that your told your theory to the psychologists, so they are already helping you. Let's see what you can achieve from this.

I don't have DID, I have not studied anything about it, frankly, my help is very limited. There are members here with DID. I am not allowed to speak about them. I'm sorry.


Your name in the birth certificate is the name of your body.
We do not know which one of you was born. Obviously, the one born in your birthday is the older one. If you existed since the body were nine, you might not be the older. But you might not remember either.

One video I saw from YouTube had a story of a woman body that had multiple personalities. Thankfully for her all of them were females. But an interesting thing is that they communicate with each other through a diary.

Maybe writing helps you to some extent? At least so you can chat with each other if you can't already.


I'm sorry. This is very difficult. You obviously can't start liking one gender or another.

Hopefully you find some comfort here. Many have found.

I wish you the best.

We can communicate with each other from the mind... imagine that it is as if instead of having one voice of conscience, you have several of them. Not always the other is present... we are still trying to understand all this. We have known for a long time that there was something strange about our behavior but it was only a couple of months ago that we were examined in a psychiatric clinic and diagnosed... thanks for the help :)

I feel for you a lot because my best friend ever had DID among many other things. It's hard to say what you should do because I don't know your environment. You could be overthinking it but you could be right as well. Don't you have at least one friend that most probably would accept it and wouldn't reveal it to anyone else?

I have a friend I met one night than going out with some friends and getting drunk... then I (Lorena) came out and told her what was happening to us and how I felt... she helps me a lot. It was the first time I had shown myself in person in front of someone. My friends were very surprised because most of them didn't know it yet (only one), but no one had seen me in person. She accepts me and I am very happy to have a friend who is my own and with whom I can be myself at least once in my life.

This isn't everything, but do you have anyone you can talk to about what's going on/how you feel? I know it's hard with multiple things intersecting (ie sexuality/did/family opinions), but I found that for everything I have going on (trans/mental health issues/substance use/etc.) even just talking about it to someone who is willing to listen even if they don't understand helps me put my thoughts in order. Also, just throwing spaghetti at the wall, but do you think some form of polyamory or ethical non-monogamy could work for you? It may seem like "even more" to deal with on top of sexuality, but I guess it sounds like you're saying "I can't operate in the framework of a typical monogamous relationship right now" and it's valuable I think to recognize that that's not the only way to operate or structure your relationships. Finally, I know it's hard, but two over arcing things to do are you try to understand clearly what the things are that you are getting from your family and friends and then think about how you might get them another way, and to think about what the beliefs are you have that keep you from excepting yourself, and then trying to be very careful with looking at what actual evidence there is to support or deny that belief. I hope something in what I said helps you find a new direction to pursue, but in any case I hope you can find some peace and acceptance.

We have thought a lot about polyamorous relationships... we believe it is the way. But we are now very bad from depression to depression and struggling with each other most of the time... We don't fight to take control, that's something we don't decide, but there are a lot of internal struggles about decisions and tastes and that kind of thing. I think we must first have our lives in order to consider something as complicated as polyamory... "throw spaghetti on the wall" is a curious way. My parents above all is what scares me the most.

One possibly might be for all of you to give yourself the chance to explore that. At least then all of you might have a better understanding of the complete situation.

Also, it might take a few, different trials at it before all of you can really know.

Are there any LGBTQ+ support centers/groups anywhere near you? If you can, join a group and get to know some gay people. You can make sex a second step, after you get some gay friends.

This should be a consideration for the future. Your sex life is your business, not theirs. You have a lot of exploration and learning to do for yourself, first.

If you're gay, that's 100% OK.

And I accept you.

That's what Eduard also tells me. That I should experiment with a boy. But I'm not like him. He is extroverted and is very good at flirting, I am shy and I hardly dare to approach a boy to flirt with him. I wish there were some LGBTQ+ support centers... in my country homosexual matromony is not even allowed.

 

[Round Two]

Being a girl in a man's body makes me feel truly miserable. But the worst thing is having to keep pretending that I am Eduard when I go out so that the others do not suspect... He tells me that it's okay, that he's not ashamed of me... but I don't see myself with enough courage to be myself in public... I think you are a very brave person :)

I want to be a girl, I have projects and goals but that's what I want most in this life since I'm little... At the time of school I fall in love with a girl, but it was a rare thing. More than sexually, I fall in love with the affection she gave me (she was my best friend)... Then analyzing the situation, I think it was not really that I liked her as a couple, but that I WANTED TO BE HER.

I would really like to hear your experiences, if it does not bother you of course... but I don't know why I can't write to you privately.

(internet is finally back up!)
Oh, I'm sure you can't message me privately because I'm still a new member. Hopefully, I'll be a full member after a few more posts. When I am, I'll send you something to let you know.

Hm. Well, honestly, it can be both. I felt that way, too. I'm not proud of being jealous of the other girls...but I was. I'd even sneak into my mom's closet as a kid when she wasn't around and try on her things. Though, even through the jealousy, I still prefer women most of all.

I'll tell you something that will help you right off before I share my experiences further.
You're not a girl in a man's body. When you're fronting, it's your body. Hell, by the sounds of it, you were the first one there, anyway, so if we're really going by who has the greater claim, then that would be you, hun. But, regardless, you're already a girl, no matter what your body looks like. You already know that, of course, but just remember that your body doesn't dictate your gender, it's the other way around.

Feeling like you're forced to be someone you're not is one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced. I think you're lucky to have Eduard so close and accepting, even if it doesn't feel like much in your life is lucky. You should hold on to that and lean on him when you can.

I'm not sure when I put all the pieces together fully, but I think it was around 14 when my breast buds formed. It was like...a biological confirmation of all these feelings I had inside me. My parents didn't think anything of it when I started wearing my shirt all the time around the house and stopped swimming with it off. Because, you know, what ultra-religious parent is going to expect a surprise daughter? I'm a bit shocked they were so dense, though.

I fell in love with my best friend. One of the...maybe two guys I've ever had feelings for. He looked at porn of trans women all the time, so that made me think I had a shot. And I kept thinking, "Dude, I'm RIGHT here". But, you know, I didn't really look the part normally. Puberty is a fickle bitch. One night he came to sleepover for the launch of a new game we were waiting for and we played a bunch. Though, it was single-player, so I told him he could play without me for a while so I could shower. I must've spent...at least an hour or two in there doing all the things that were needed to make me look more like myself...even a little eyeliner a friend gave me. When I came out of the bathroom, I saw across the house in the dim night light...my father. He grilled me on why I was in the shower for so long and...even noticed the eyeliner. I evaded and weaved my way through the conversation, just telling him it was a long day and I was tired. Bullet dodged. My friend wasn't so easy, though. He nitpicked every little thing about me and shot me down hard. That was my first time trying to...really and truly show myself to someone. Was it the best way? No, of course not. I was a kid, though, so it's all I could come up with. It wasn't a great night.

I heard at school about Transgender Day of Remembrance and well, I didn't exactly understand what it was about. So, I thought, "oh, well, I'll stand in solidarity and come dressed up in girl clothes tomorrow". In hindsight, I'm mortified by my misunderstanding, but...at the same time, I don't think any of our fallen siblings would have been upset that I used it as an excuse to fully be myself in public for the first time. So, I did. I even sat at the family breakfast table the next morning fully dressed as a butch mall goth in a black lotus-print dress a friend loaned me. It was scary...but I ended up having a really really nice day. All the other students at school were very kind to me. Girls, boys, everyone. In a small way...it gave me hope for the future in a way I couldn't understand at the time.

Though, even with all that and with the picture getting clearer and clearer, I knew it didn't matter. I knew that even though I was a girl my family would never see me that way. So, I pushed it down as best I could.

Quite obviously, that didn't take. I'll skim a bit since I feel like I've already written a novel here. But, I'm eight years into my transition and I have no regrets. I lost a lot of people. And, the reality is, anyone who transitions runs that very serious and real risk. I know I'm supposed to sit here and sugar-coat it to make it easier for you, but I won't. It's scary, it's painful, and in a fair number of cases, it could turn your life completely upside-down. And it did for me. I lived one of the worse cases. So, I want you to think about how meaningful this is to me that I can sit here and tell you honestly that I have no regrets. Being able to wake up every morning as yourself...there's no greater feeling. But, the reality is, it all starts with you. It starts with you being able to look in the mirror and admit to yourself who you are.

 

[ContinuousJump]

Lorena (and Eduard and any others), please allow me to agree with everyone who has mentioned that this is a delicate and sensitive situation. Please follow the advice to get as much professional help as possible. I know nothing about DID and how you guys (meaning all of you) should best handle this.

I am a just 50 yo gay man who faced a lot of challenges coming-out, so I am only answering from that, limited perspective.

One possibly might be for all of you to give yourself the chance to explore that.

That's what Eduard also tells me. That I should experiment with a boy. But I'm not like him. He is extroverted and is very good at flirting, I am shy and I hardly dare to approach a boy to flirt with him.

That's great! That seems very good that Eduard is so supportive. I'm not sure if it's possible, or even a good idea, but would it be something that he'd be willing to "take the lead" and is there any way that you could "watch"? If not, would he be willing to try it and then tell you all about it?

I'm not saying to do anything sudden! Not anything rash. But, perhaps planning together what might be possible.

Are there any LGBTQ+ support centers/groups anywhere near you?

I wish there were some LGBTQ+ support centers... in my country homosexual matromony is not even allowed.

In the small town I grew-up in, even in the midwest USA, throughout my childhood and teenage years... nobody ever talked about homosexuality. 35 years ago, it was very oppressive.

So, all of you need to be very careful. Please take your time with this! With social media, you have many more possibilities than I did, though. I'd make it a priority to find some gay friends, male and female. Imho, the sex will come when you are all ready for it to happen. But having LGBTQ+ friends could give you very helpful support.

 

[FromGermany]

"It's not like being bisexual, I wish I was bisexual"

It is obviously bisexual and there is everything fine with it. Just accept it and do not search for an excuse, that it is not. As you can see, searching for other reasons will harm your own feelings by yourself.

 

[Dot]

"It's not like being bisexual, I wish I was bisexual"

It is obviously bisexual and there is everything fine with it. Just accept it and do not search for an excuse, that it is not. As you can see, searching for other reasons will harm your own feelings by yourself.

Is nt bi-sxl. 1 altr lks mles & othr altr lks fmles. Is nt 1 'prsn' lkng bth bc r nt integr8d.

 

[FromGermany]

I am very sorry, my universal translator from the Star Trek shop has obviously a malfunction, because it can not translate that message.

 

[Round Two]

I am very sorry, my universal translator from the Star Trek shop has obviously a malfunction, because it can not translate that message.

Reading is hard, I know. Here you go:

"It's not bisexual. One alter likes males and the other alter likes females. It isn't one person liking both because they're not integrated."

 

[Dot]

Reading is hard, I know. Here you go:

"It's not bisexual. One alter likes males and the other alter likes females. It isn't one person liking both because they're not integrated."

Appreci8

 

[FromGermany]

It's always funny, if a member needs his personal translator.

However, if one believes, two or more personalities are not "integrated" with sexual preferences, I am sorry, either that person has serious problems aside from the post or the person was told that as long as he started to believe that.

 

[Dot]

It's always funny, if a member needs his personal translator.

However, if one believes, two or more personalities are not "integrated" with sexual preferences, I am sorry, either that person has serious problems aside from the post or the person was told that as long as he started to believe that.

Info y nd it on prfle. Nt nd 2 b rde.

 

[FromGermany]

I wish you a pleasant stay.

 

[Dot]

However, if one believes, two or more personalities are not "integrated" with sexual preferences, I am sorry, either that person has serious problems aside from the post or the person was told that as long as he started to believe that.

Unlss u r OPs therpst or psychtrst is nt ur plce 2 mke tht assessmnt. If nt blve OP thn mve on 2 anthr pst.

 

[goldenvirginia]

It's always funny, if a member needs his personal translator.

However, if one believes, two or more personalities are not "integrated" with sexual preferences, I am sorry, either that person has serious problems aside from the post or the person was told that as long as he started to believe that.

Get some bloody manners. You may be suffering at the moment, but so is everyone else on this site. No need to be a prick to someone. Asshole.

 

[FromGermany]

As long as people only want to hear that messages, they want to hear and nothing else, nothing will change to the good. It's a fallacy to believe, to give high five to all people will make any sense.

It is better for some people to hear opinions from a very different view instead only waiting for softball replies. I have my opinion on many things and a lot of life experience.

With one exception uncertainty or even mental trouble with sexual preferences is the result of pressure, experiences or a bad influcence from outside the own mind.

All three things can be combated to find peace on this matter.

Softball and yelling "Asshole" like a 16 years old can not do that.

 

[goldenvirginia]

As long as people only want to hear that messages, they want to hear and nothing else, nothing will change to the good. It's a fallacy to believe, to give high five to all people will make any sense.

It is better for some people to hear opinions from a very different view instead only waiting for softball replies. I have my opinion on many things and a lot of life experience.

With one exception uncertainty or even mental trouble with sexual preferences is the result of pressure, experiences or a bad influcence from outside the own mind.

All three things can be combated to find peace on this matter.

Softball and yelling "Asshole" like a 16 years old can not do that.

I'm referring to how you spoke to @Dot. Maybe all that life experience could be channelled into being respectful? I'm far from 16 years old. I'm a grown woman. And I'll call anyone an asshole who behaves like one.

 

[Dot]

As long as people only want to hear that messages, they want to hear and nothing else, nothing will change to the good. It's a fallacy to believe, to give high five to all people will make any sense.

It is better for some people to hear opinions from a very different view instead only waiting for softball replies. I have my opinion on many things and a lot of life experience.

With one exception uncertainty or even mental trouble with sexual preferences is the result of pressure, experiences or a bad influcence from outside the own mind.

All three things can be combated to find peace on this matter.

Softball and yelling "Asshole" like a 16 years old can not do that.

U r ignrng OPs mentn of D.I.D or d nt hve an undrstndng of wht it is. Havng opninn is 1 thng & tllng OP 'u r bisxul' whn u d nt knw abt OP is bth ill-infrmd & invald8ng.

M.h prfssnls wld nt apprch in sch a wy bc cn b harmfl. U r nt thrpst.

& lke g.v sd tllng ppl wht nt wnt 2 hr ds 2 gve rght 2 b insltng 2 slf eithr.

 

[Round Two]

Regardless of where I fall in this discourse, I think anyone here to actually be helpful can agree that it isn't contributing in any positive way.

 

[goldenvirginia]

I am sorry, I am too old and have no time to decrypt the writings of a person, who is unable to write regular words as every normal person in the world would do that on a forum. It looks as if you are totally drunk. Perhaps you are? I don't know.

Everyone is free to write like he wants or to yell what he wants. I am the last who opposes that, but it's just crazy.

If I say my opinion to the thread starter, that he is bisexual. Perhaps he should simply take some drinks like you, not so many of course and ask himself: "Perhaps I am and what would be so wrong with that?"

This would be better than the sofballing from people with pseudo-empathy who support him on this in my opinion bad thoughts about himself.

For that one must have an open mind. The problem with some on this forum.

Open mind? Dot has a condition that means she can't help typing like that. If you'd bothered to read her profile, like she'd asked you would know that. I don't think you're in any position to question anyone's empathy. When you can't even be arsed to speak to someone without being a total dick.

 

[motel rooms]

I am sorry, I am too old and have no time to decrypt the writings of a person, who is unable to write regular words as every normal person in the world would do that on a forum. It looks as if you are totally drunk. Perhaps you are? I don't know.

Everyone is free to write like he wants or to yell what he wants. I am the last who opposes that, but it's just crazy.

Please read @Dot's signature...

Info on y type lke ths on prfle pge. = Info on why I type like this is on my profile page.

@Dot is not being eccentric nor purposely annoying...

 

[FromGermany]

True empathy would be good advice and not fighting others for the own purpose.

There is also these proxy-empathy phenomena.
Allegedly showing empathy, but in reality it's only to confirm the own feelings without caring about the stranger in any way or thinking about him.

Before some yelling specialist will twist again my words, I did not say, that proxy-empathy applies to all members, but to a few.

Again: True empathy would be good advice and not fighting others for the own purpose.

I do not claim general empathy for me to everyone. With my posts on this forum I make clear, to whom I have some real mystery connections or not. So I do not play games, no hoaxes, no show, and finally, no proxy-empathy.

 

[goldenvirginia]

And still no apology or recognition that you were unnecessarily rude….Arrogance is a very ugly thing. Mr Specialist.