Last night I got really really high and noticed that it made me not only more suicidal but I also almost passed out several times just from laughing. I think if I were to try hyperventilating and do a shallow water drowning I could CTB.
I think I will also take all of my prescription meds (especially the trazodone) to really make sure I have a hard time responding to the SWD.
I think this will be my plan going forward. I turn 21 in March and will likely do it around that time (mostly because I don't want to get weed from a friend and then CTB and have them feel responsible for it).
I'm kind of feeling relieved right now. It gives me time to see if things will get better while also keeping me hopeful that now I have a way out if I choose so.
I think I will also take all of my prescription meds (especially the trazodone) to really make sure I have a hard time responding to the SWD.
I think this will be my plan going forward. I turn 21 in March and will likely do it around that time (mostly because I don't want to get weed from a friend and then CTB and have them feel responsible for it).
I'm kind of feeling relieved right now. It gives me time to see if things will get better while also keeping me hopeful that now I have a way out if I choose so.
