All of those perfectionists who say, "Love yourself first! No one will be attracted to you if you don't love yourself!" have unrealistic expectations for relationships. They want something picture perfect and fantasy-esque, when real life doesn't work that way. Actual relationships are far more complicated than that.
I understand exactly how you are feeling, and it is completely valid to want to seek out connections with other people. We are social animals by nature, regardless of how hard modern life pushes people into trying to accept isolation as the default state. There is nothing wrong with you for wanting love in your life.
A person does not have to be flawless to be deserving of affection and romance, to expect someone to be 100% self- confident and have every aspect of their life micromanaged and sorted before seeking love is absurd. So don't listen to those people. They probably don't even follow their own advice. Do the best you can to nurture a happy and fulfilling relationship for the both of you, that's really all that matters.
We all need validation. The problem is, a lot of the people who will scold and chastise you for desiring romantic relationships as an outlet for reassurance and comfort are getting theirs elsewhere, so they expect you to do the same. It puts a damper on those with optimism biases and individualistic mindsets to consider the possibility that other people may not have a wide network of loving family and friends to provide them with companionship.
A lot of people who objectively do not struggle as much in life happened to receive a large amount of validation and nurture during their childhood (and often times, their adulthood as well, if they have jobs where they are valued and appreciated) . They were loved and encouraged by their parents, teachers, and peers, so their self confidence is naturally robust.
The problem lies with the fact that our culture expects everyone to have experienced a good upbringing. There is no support for those who did not have parents or family to cheer them on, those who were let down by their teachers, ostracised by their classmates with no opportunities to date and experiment during their youth and adolescence, and so on and so forth.
As a child, did you ever watch the film Matilda, or read the book? There are similar themes in other types of literature, such as Harry Potter, so they all seem to boil down to a familiar formula by the end of the story.
A gifted person with loads of potential is held back by abusive family members/caregivers, but whenever they finally receive proper validation and care, they begin to thrive. The desire to be loved and cared for does not end when we hit the mystical age of 18 and enter adulthood. Our desire to be built up and reaffirmed does not magically vanish when we enter a new phase of life.
You need time to be patient with yourself and acknowledge that it isn't your fault that you haven't found "the one" yet. This world is set up to favor those who have been fortunate since day one. I'd say there is plenty of time to take small steps towards finding a partner. Going to university is a brilliant idea I think, because you will have lots of opportunities to meet people and practice socialising.
I hope you're able to experience that connection you want.
