Venting I lost my faith and my shit

[terra.nuvo]

So it's finally over. I've given up on everything. I'm tired of trying and believing that things will get better or that there are better days ahead. I tried so hard and I've been struggling for years now. And for a moment, about a month, I felt like I could finally make it and be alright. But that's apparently not gonna happen. I texted the guy who broke my heart and treated me like shit. Seeing if after 3 years he'd finally say anything. Even that he doesn't want to talk to me. But like always he continued to ghost me. But at least he finally blocked me! He told me he loved me. And all I ever did was tell him the truth. The truth about everything about me and he still manipulated me and lied to me. I give up. I hate life. And I know that I can't bring myself to end it all, but I just wish the pain would end. I give up.

 

[timf]

Relationship pain can be a little different that some other types of pain. At first the pain can be intense and slowly lessen somewhat only to hit again but with slightly less intensity. These waves of pain, while recurring, slowly lessen as healing takes place. This time of recovery can be painful, but it also can be a time to learn what it was about the other person you should have seen that would have predicted this outcome. This can be useful to avoid such people in the future.