Venting I just want to stab myself

[fleetingnight]

It's a terrible idea, I would alost definitely just hurt myself instead of dying, but the urge to just stab myself in the throat is so strong. I hate everything. I hate being tired all the time and half-sedated from the medication I have to take. I even stopped taking one that I need, but it's not enough I'm still tired. It's not just the meds, it's me. The whole day went by and I didn't do FUCKING JACK SHIT!!!! Why do I kjeep trying to not be useless when I know it's pointless and I always will be? Why do I keep trying? What the fuck is actually wrong with me?

 

[GlacialScythe]

Yeah I have 4 meds that I'm supposed to take daily that I just throw away at this point. I still go to my pharmacy and pick up the monthly prescription but I just throw them away daily. (I have a green bowl that I put one of each & 2 of my adhd one and then I just toss them in the trash)