Venting i hate myself

[skittle-chan]

i hate myself for not being enough
for not being strong enough
for not being pretty enough
for not studying enough
for not working on myslef enough
for turning myself into a mysery

 

[Cryptonite]

It's absolutely not your fault. Other people can do these things because they were randomly given good childhoods and good genes. We were not. We bear zero responsibility. All we should think about is how to end our pain we did not deserve.

 

[dmdmdm]

i hate myself for not being enough
for not being strong enough
for not being pretty enough
for not studying enough
for not working on myslef enough
for turning myself into a mysery

It's all about genetics I'm afraid. I hope it will get better for you eventually

 

[Ligand]

It's absolutely not your fault. Other people can do these things because they were randomly given good childhoods and good genes. We were not. We bear zero responsibility. All we should think about is how to end our pain we did not deserve.

This covers like 90% of why people have bad lives. I had a great childhood and good genes but I randomly became very ill, and it still ruined my life, so even that shit doesn't always keep you safe LOL

 

[Cryptonite]

This covers like 90% of why people have bad lives. I had a great childhood and good genes but I randomly became very ill, and it still ruined my life, so even that shit doesn't always keep you safe LOL

You didn't become ill because of your genes? Most diseases are caused by genes. Cancer, heart disease, spinal disease, CFS, everything seems to be genetic, even if it is triggered later in life...

By the way, I'm totally a hard determinist too. There is no free will, it is just an illusion. This helped me to understand my parents' cruelty and medical misdiagnoses of my spinal disease at the time when it was still curable.

 

[Ligand]

You didn't become ill because of your genes? Most diseases are caused by genes. Cancer, heart disease, spinal disease, CFS, everything seems to be genetic, even if it is triggered later in life...

By the way, I'm totally a hard determinist too. There is no free will, it is just an illusion. This helped me to understand my parents' cruelty and medical misdiagnoses of my spinal disease at the time when it was still curable.

One of my issues was definitely congenital but the others might have been primarily caused by the environment. I'm a hard determinist as well and have thought about my specific situation quite a bit and the biological components involved (read my profile lol). Great genetics can protect you from a lot of different conditions, but it's almost impossible to know which chronic conditions are caused entirely by the environment and which aren't (barring some obvious examples like spinal cord injuries). I would give some personal examples, but I don't want to dox myself lol.

The reason I brought this up up was mainly just to point out out that no one is safe. The most successful, attractive, smart, fit, and rich guy in the world can be hit by a bus tomorrow and be cursed by a TBI. He would end up in a nursing home and lose everything. I don't know anyone that has good enough genetics to prevent that shit from happening.

 

[Cryptonite]

One of my issues was definitely congenital but the others might have been primarily caused by the environment. I'm a hard determinist as well and have thought about my specific situation quite a bit and the biological components involved (read my profile lol). Great genetics can protect you from a lot of different conditions, but it's almost impossible to know which chronic conditions are caused entirely by the environment and which aren't (barring some obvious examples like spinal cord injuries). I would give some personal examples, but I don't want to dox myself lol.

The reason I brought this up up was mainly just to point out out that no one is safe. The most successful, attractive, smart, fit, and rich guy in the world can be hit by a bus tomorrow and be cursed by a TBI. He would end up in a nursing home and lose everything. I don't know anyone that has good enough genetics to prevent that shit from happening.

Exactly, injuries are not prevented by genetics. They are prevented by safe behavior, but no one feels the need to act safe, especially in young age. Everyone feels invincible.

Let's hope that successful CTB is written in our predetermined destiny.