Venting I hate myself and the way I look 🦄

[sweetsweetsuicide]

I used to be so fat. Around 85kg, and I hated myself so much. Since then I've starved myself and lost 20kg so far. But even though I'm now a healthy weight, I still feel fat and disgusting. I haven't stopped yet, because I want to be underweight now.

I feel disgusting and worthless because of how I look. I feel like I take up so much space and I'm uninvited wherever I go because I look so wide. Many times I've wanted to die because of it. I'm 63kg now but I want to get to atleast 40kg or something.

 

[Kobusu]

I've seen body dysmorphia and eating disorders destroy people. I used to be much the same, though it's much different as a masculine presenting person. I can only say that I hope you find a way to ground yourself, and to view yourself through a less subjective lens. Maybe manage the cognitive dissonance of knowing something is true that you do not believe to be. I'm sorry, I hope you do not let dysmorphia destroy you.