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LevUwU

LevUwU

I hate my life and the government
Mar 16, 2024
190
I've struggled with body image for as long as I can know. BDD is basically my life-long friend. However, recently the complete detachment of self I feel from my body is getting more and more impulsively destructive. I feel like I am not my body, as such, any harm done to it is just and right. It deserves it, and not only that, it needs it. Recently I bit my tongue and a small part became inflamed, while looking at my tongue in the mirror, I noticed a small protrusion from the underside of my tongue, the plica fimbriata, and while not as extreme as the image in this it felt... wrong? Like I had to remove it, like it was causing me pain, not the pain of inflammation, the pain of its existence. It was wrong, and I had to get rid of it. I had to, it didn't belong on this flesh. I tried to scrape it off, like a scab to no avail. Luckily I stopped myself before I grabbed the nearby nail clippers and cut it off. This is just one of many examples, so much with my body is wrong that I have to correct it. Remove the hairs till there is none remaining, scrape off the skin so it remains smooth. What is so wrong with me that everything is in need of fixing to the point I'm hurting myself daily just to fix everything, and when it's fixed? It's never good enough.
 
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