i feel so alone

[failedmind]

i want to ctb so badly. literally more than anything. but im so scared of fucking up. i've researched methods for hours, i think i might get it right, but trauma has made me so dumb id probably end up ruining everything. i know mostly all of us are here bc we want to die. i just feel so alone. i wish si wasnt a thing. i know we probably all do. i wish i could use a gun with no worry. or jump off a bridge confidently. or better, have access to n and go more peacefully. life fucking sucks. i hate it here. thats all

 

[uklad38]

Sorry to hear you feel like this. SI is indeed such a blocker, it sucks.

 

[tonicer]

I also feel alone. Except me mother i have nobody. It sucks that she is almost 80 and even got diagnosed with cancer recently. I hope the operation is a success and they get all of it.