Venting I Don't Understand Why I Keep On Living

[socrates]

I have nothing. My girlfriend left me last year. I was talking to one girl for a month. We even went on a date IRL. As someone with agoraphobia it was one of the best days of my life, but she lost interest. My health is starting to fail. I don't make enough money to support myself. Everyone is passing me by in life. I keep on making mistakes and having new Trauma.

My life is nothing but misery at this point. My only joy comes from eating food and and sometimes you-tube videos/ Tv shows. I have nothing to look forward too.

So why can't I just kill myself! I'm such a failure I can't even kill myself. I'm just a useless eater. I don't bring anything good to the world. I only hurt people. I don't mean to I try my best not too, but our intentions don't matter. I just want to die.

I wish I could just get the courage and do partial. Charcoal is my preferred at the moment, but that would be hard to pull off

 

[darkenmydoorstep]

Love and strength to you. Rejection in love is so painful isn't it? I hear you.
I feel the same. I take little pleasure from things these days. Even eating just turns me into a fat bastard so that doesn't bring me much joy because I'm always thinking what it's doing to me. That it's going to make me heavier and uglier and then I will hate myself even more.

 

[UKscotty]

There is always hope until we CTB.

If you are not sure, maybe check out the recovery section?

 

[Adûnâi]

I'd say, wait to check whether AI changes everything in the coming 1-2 years. Unless you have actual pressures making suicide a more immediate desire.

 

[socrates]

Love and strength to you. Rejection in love is so painful isn't it? I hear you.
I feel the same. I take little pleasure from things these days. Even eating just turns me into a fat bastard so that doesn't bring me much joy because I'm always thinking what it's doing to me. That it's going to make me heavier and uglier and then I will hate myself even more.

yeah, I'm trying to loose weight too, I have a love hate relationship with food

 

[Mi Mi]

I have nothing. My girlfriend left me last year. I was talking to one girl for a month. We even went on a date IRL. As someone with agoraphobia it was one of the best days of my life, but she lost interest. My health is starting to fail. I don't make enough money to support myself. Everyone is passing me by in life. I keep on making mistakes and having new Trauma.

My life is nothing but misery at this point. My only joy comes from eating food and and sometimes you-tube videos/ Tv shows. I have nothing to look forward too.

So why can't I just kill myself! I'm such a failure I can't even kill myself. I'm just a useless eater. I don't bring anything good to the world. I only hurt people. I don't mean to I try my best not too, but our intentions don't matter. I just want to die.

I wish I could just get the courage and do partial. Charcoal is my preferred at the moment, but that would be hard to pull off

Same

 

[thewalkingdread]

Well, Socrates... It's easier to drink hemlock when one is actually sentenced to death.

For mere mortals like us, It takes a lot of willpower to go through with it.