I don’t think I want friends anymore

[return.]

I feel so hopeless about making friends. At this point, I just want to eat lunch with someone, no conversation or anything. Just some fast food from Wendy's or McDonald's and just enjoy it together. I want to feel human and feel like I'm a part of something. I eat alone so often and haven't had anyone to properly eat. I want to enjoy a meal with someone not because we're forced to eat together but because they genuinely want to spend some time with me, even if it's just some food we're enjoying. I know this is pretty weird but I just had this random thought.

 

[lita-lassi]

as someone who lives with family that dont cook with/for me or include me in their meal plans at all so im usually eating alone in my room, i feel your loneliness and im sorry. food is wired to be a social thing with so many species, it really isnt fun to try to enjoy it alone. i barely taste things when im in an extra shitty mood as is. trying to force it down alone is nauseating. id share my fries with anyone that wont force me to talk, just sayin

 

[cryone]

i understand. theres a sort of stress that comes along w/ a friend. you have to say something funny n keep a conversation going. sometimes just a presence is enough n much better. while i eat i watch videos from youtubers or streamers i enjoy n i feel less lonely.

 

[return.]

as someone who lives with family that dont cook with/for me or include me in their meal plans at all so im usually eating alone in my room, i feel your loneliness and im sorry. food is wired to be a social thing with so many species, it really isnt fun to try to enjoy it alone. i barely taste things when im in an extra shitty mood as is. trying to force it down alone is nauseating. id share my fries with anyone that wont force me to talk, just sayin

Exactly, I feel like many people want to talk or do something while eating, which I'm not too big a fan of. I just want somebody's presence like another commenter on here said. Someone who actually wants to be around me and enjoy a meal.

i understand. theres a sort of stress that comes along w/ a friend. you have to say something funny n keep a conversation going. sometimes just a presence is enough n much better. while i eat i watch videos from youtubers or streamers i enjoy n i feel less lonely.

Yeah, sometimes someone's presence is good enough. It makes you feel a little less lonely. I used to watch youtubers while eating as well but I don't do that anymore. No real reason, I just stopped.

 

[lemonbunny]

i feel this so hard omfg, but i have nobody im comfortable enough with to do that

 

[CuriosityAndCat]

Have you considered getting a dog or like? I don't really feel alone ever because animals want my attention or food.

Also have you guys considered meeting up and eating together over video conference? you don't really NEED to talk much or keep a conversation going. Silent moments are perfectly okay.

 

[Valky]

Let's all eat together!!!

 

[Malaria]

There's a part of me that wants to give up on friendships because of how difficult they are for me. I've been in so many cycles of bad/toxic friendships, it's exhausting. But at the same time I get so lonely that I can't stand it.

 

[Adûnâi]

I've never had a single friend in my life, so I honestly have no idea. I do understand that companionship is supposed to precede sex, but I honestly doubt I could endure it for the sake of sex. I stopped eating with my family when I was ~10? The very idea is so alien to me. I'd rather have friends on demand when I want to have an insightful dialogue about politics or history, haha.

 

[return.]

i feel this so hard omfg, but i have nobody im comfortable enough with to do that

I feel you. It's definitely uncomfortable and nerve wracking

There's a part of me that wants to give up on friendships because of how difficult they are for me. I've been in so many cycles of bad/toxic friendships, it's exhausting. But at the same time I get so lonely that I can't stand it.

I feel this way too. Some part of me really just doesn't wanna try anymore. Though, unlike you, I've never had any friends or relationships. Another part of me can't stand this loneliness and still wants to try. Do you have any friends right now? Hopefully you find someone that makes you happy!

 

[Malaria]

Do you have any friends right now? Hopefully you find someone that makes you happy!

I do have friends and some of them are very nice to me.

The thing is, I have autism, which makes it really difficult for me to see red flags in people, so what ends up happening is that I get involved with toxic people. But I also have BPD so my fear of abandonment makes it really difficult for me to cut toxic people out of my life, due to my fear of rejection and abandonment. It's... an ordeal to say the least.

 

[return.]

I do have friends and some of them are very nice to me.

The thing is, I have autism, which makes it really difficult for me to see red flags in people, so what ends up happening is that I get involved with toxic people. But I also have BPD so my fear of abandonment makes it really difficult for me to cut toxic people out of my life, due to my fear of rejection and abandonment. It's... an ordeal to say the least.

It's good that you have some nice friends. Sorry to hear about what you're going through.

 

[Mirrory Me]

Have you possibly watched any movies lately? I'm subcouncously embarrassed to eat in the company of others, because I chomp and gobble quickly- also preffering to eat more than others in general.