I chickened out of CTB

[pauly1963]

Hi sweet @pauly1963

I'm sorry that your suffering led you to put yourself in danger like this ❤

You have nothing to be ashamed of regarding your experience, anyone would have been scared in the face of that, me first ❤

I've already had in the past, when I wanted to throw myself under a train, like a force inside me, which kept me from putting myself on the railway

I think today it was SI, I understand what you experienced, as if an inner you was holding you back and as you approached the danger, you felt physical pain, tingling, electric sensations inside you

The survival instinct is, after all, the last bastion that human beings have to protect our integrity, and it is necessary to believe that it passes by physical sensations, as well as by emotions, thoughts

In any case, know that your suffering is legitimate ❤

I wish you from the bottom of my heart that things will get better ❤

Love ❤

Thank you so much. That is really nice of you.

 

[lebrodude]

No jumping or trains for this boy, no suh, boss no suh! Drugs, poisons or maybe even a firearm, but no damn trains or high jumps.

I'm in the UK so firearms are out.
It's either hanging, sn if I can get it or if I have the energy to be creative exit bag with nitrogen.

Did consider drowning but ugh…no!

 

[Tiberius85]

Stop beating yourself up: there is no such thing as "chicken out". There is nothing you need to be ashamed of.

Suicide is the ultimate decision. It's your personal decision and yours only. There is no right or wrong. There is only life or death.

If you have any hope left, no matter how small it is, any attachment to (the beauty of) life, then it was the right thing not to follow through - rather take more time to think it properly true, and make a rational decision, as much as that is possible in your situation.

 

[pauly1963]

I'm in the UK so firearms are out.
It's either hanging, sn if I can get it or if I have the energy to be creative exit bag with nitrogen.

Did consider drowning but ugh…no!

Here in the UK also. If firearms were legal here, I'm sure I would have gone a long time ago.