i cant think clearly anymore

[deletedaccount30982]

my mind is becoming more and more clouded. my thoughts don't even feel like my own anymore. i feel so jaded and hateful and that's never been who i am. i think i need to ctb soon because i don't like what i'm becoming. hopefully there will be an unusually warm day soon and i can just go into the woods and end it

 

[counting-out-time]

I feel your pain. Most days i walk round in circles knowing that I'm alive but want to end it all. I go to do a simple task and while thinking about cbt. I then forget what it was I was going to do.

I have some methods I'm planning on using to CBT but it's hard as trying to be free in order to do it which sucks.

 

[Hollowman]

Not being able to think clearly is probably what's keeping me alive.

 

[cowie]

I have increasingly been dealing with brain fog/clouded mind as well to the point I have trouble doing almost anything. I sometimes wonder if this is something that has just been slowly been getting worse my whole life and has just reached the point of being intolerable.

 

[deletedaccount30982]

there's a day this week that is going to be super warm and perfect weather for being in the woods but i don't want to put that on my family the week of thanksgiving. god why does this all have to be so complicated

 

[brokensea]

there's a day this week that is going to be super warm and perfect weather for being in the woods but i don't want to put that on my family the week of thanksgiving. god why does this all have to be so complicated

Yes I always think it's better to wait after the holidays a bit. I feel like every holiday some people will think of me like I think of my ex who died around this time. So it does ruin things forever in a way for other people. You can't always wait but I think if I had the opportunity I would wait a couple months past Christmas.

 

[Ellipsis]

my mind is becoming more and more clouded. my thoughts don't even feel like my own anymore. i feel so jaded and hateful and that's never been who i am. i think i need to ctb soon because i don't like what i'm becoming. hopefully there will be an unusually warm day soon and i can just go into the woods and end it

I understand how you feel, I don't recognize myself anymore. I am very emotionally unstable: one day I think one thing, and the next day I think the opposite. I've been like this since I know I'm going CTB and the date is almost set. Usually, I am rather stable mentally, I manage to think and form an opinion on a subject. But now everything is blurry, it's terrifying.
Good luck to you