I am a scientist.

[prototypian]

I am a scientist. A chemist by training. Lately I have had such a hard time with faith. To be honest I dislike faith. I don't enjoy believing rather than experiments. This makes me down but my brain just runs with it. I don't know whether to believe in god out of fear that I could be wrong or not believe since I feel the belief itself is wrong.

Hard to say

 

[Mirelight]

I don't think you can believe in god out of fear... If god is really as omnipotent and omniscient as ppl make it out to be it would probably know you don't actually believe it and are only "believing" it as a show out of fear for it. Then you would be even more fucked for lying as well as not genuinely believing/ worshipping it!

 

[failure383]

From what I can tell, you think like an atheist. You can't convert to a religion from nothing just with sheer will. There has to be genuine component of faith, that you can't train or force, it's just there. If you feel nothing while praying, you can't just decide you want to feel a strong connection to god somehow out of the nothing.