I am a grown man. I cried about 5 times today. Coming here is a sign shit has gotten real.

[ChildrensITV]

This place is way more helpful than Reddit's SuicideWatch in which you can only talk about how bad you feel but not discuss anything to do with suicide. It seems like everyone there is just venting. They have "goodbye" posts and then you check their history and they posted 4 min ago. Or their post is:

"Goodbye

Edit: I didn't do it"

I knew about SS for a long time but I forgot about it cuz I had one good thing (a person) stopping me from ending my life at the time. But now that person is gone. Making the jump from the "venting" Reddit SuicideWatch to this site means now I need advice, to talk to people who have researched, to be among those who mean business. Shit got real.

I was asked by a family member if I wanted anything while they were shopping. I wanted them to leave me alone cuz I was barely holding in the tears. Then I burst into tears. I cried so much today. I was 0% productive today as I have been for the last days, and before that I was like 10% productive. I am no longer functional. My bank account is dwindling, my age is going up. I know how the rest of this ends. I don't want to suffer the indignity of having to live a foregone conclusion.

This is a supportive, wholesome community. It doesn't feel like anonymous people shitposting like on Reddit. There are actual stories, lives, and experiences here.

 

[Sulyya]

I get you. While I'm still making money from work, I'm barely able to do anything there - as you say, barely functional. That will catch up and it's scary to think about being cornered over it.

Crying... while it is technically healthy to express, it sort of feels scary when an emotion takes over your whole body like that.

It may be good for you to be here. Try to find something meaningful if you can that will be good for you, in whatever way you're seeking.

 

[UseItOrLoseIt]

I cried about a week ago at work. And I mean really cried. Crocodille tears. I couldn't stop. Thankfully, my coworker is a very compassionate girl with her fair share of traumas so she didn't take it badly. She let me cry. The very next day I cried to my friend trying to explain to him that I'm on the brink.

 

[ChildrensITV]

I get you. While I'm still making money from work, I'm barely able to do anything there - as you say, barely functional. That will catch up and it's scary to think about being cornered over it.

Crying... while it is technically healthy to express, it sort of feels scary when an emotion takes over your whole body like that.

It may be good for you to be here. Try to find something meaningful if you can that will be good for you, in whatever way you're seeking.

Thanks. If I had a job, it wouldn't be a good reason to stick around but it would be A reason. It would be validation that I am not an unemployable, unstable moron. It would allow me to live like a semifunctioning adult.

This is a good community. It's a shame that, in order for me to get what I want out of it, I have to leave it (CTB).

 

[ExistHarm]

this place is very comforting for me. in a world filled to the brim with pro-life propaganda, this is one of the only places i can feel comfortable expressing my anguish and fears, regrets, suffering, and the ctb ideation that naturally arises without judgment. just like so many things in this hell, its all backwards; the place people go to learn how to commit violent acts against themselves (for the greater good on nonexistence) is a kind and caring place. i really think if more people understood that they have the RIGHT TO DIE, they would exercise it. many, many people. or at least, it might allow for some peace of mind..

 

[uniqueusername39]

oof, r/suicidewatch. a prolife den masquerading as prochoice. my account got banned for telling someone not to jump feet first. That's all I said. I didn't tell them what to do, just what not to do. and i got banned for "threatening violence". i felt so stifled there. you can't say shit, can't say anything beyond "i understand" because that would be "validating their suicidal thoughts", and that's a no-no there. i hated it there. i'm so thankful for finding this one, accidentally, in a facebook group of fellow suicidal individuals.

 

[ExistHarm]

jump feet first.

nightmare

 

[ManchildLoser]

I totally understand you, i feel the same way...like i'm doomed or cursed...i've wasted years of my life because of depression and loneliness, and now its too late. Im so broken inside, i cant even cry, i just feel nothing.

oof, r/suicidewatch. a prolife den masquerading as prochoice. my account got banned for telling someone not to jump feet first. That's all I said. I didn't tell them what to do, just what not to do. and i got banned for "threatening violence". i felt so stifled there. you can't say shit, can't say anything beyond "i understand" because that would be "validating their suicidal thoughts", and that's a no-no there. i hated it there. i'm so thankful for finding this one, accidentally, in a facebook group of fellow suicidal individuals.

What is the Facebook group? I want to join

 

[bigdog]

The biggest thing therapists don't get is that a world in my view is very competitive environment and there are winners and losers. We are not living in a mythical communism. I also watched series of lectures posted here about rational suicide. If you know that the chances for happy life are literally non existent than why continue.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's undeniable that this world is so pro life and it disgusts me how there is a lack of acceptance towards the right to die. It seems as though so many people would rather try to avoid the subject of suicide and censor any discussions associated with it, rather than trying to understand that in such a hellish world wishing for suicide is certainly a logical option. Nobody should have to stay here and suffer against their wishes, it's cruel to expect people to and it's harmful to deny the cruel reality of this existence.