How's everyone's day going?

[SinisterKid]

Sometimes, what happens in the past is best left in the past. Tonight is about good memories and I want to keep it that way. I think we spend so much time with the negative, its good to have a different vibe going, if only for a short time and this thread has provided just that.

I am starting to get some insight into your name and avatar choice, so its been educational too

 

[Weeping Garbage Can]

Does anyone else feel like they've lived multiple lifetimes? Even on this site alone, so many users have come and go, it feels like forever since I've made an account. Oh, and it's lovely to meet you all :)

 

[DoomedxFromBirth]

Im in a mental fog cause of my migraine medicine. It leaves me tired and feeling shitty and more depressed than I already feel. Im tired of the endless loop of shitty sleeping and going to work. So yeah I feel like shit lol currently in the dark next to my cat. Glad you came out of your shell friend.

 

[SinisterKid]

My lifetime feels like its been very very long and yet it has passed by in the blink of a eye. I have known and forgotten more people than I can mention. I often wonder what happened to someone I knew for a short period of time. I once had a very long conversation with a woman from NZ. We were on some chat room set up and after a few pleasantries, she said, "So I suppose we had better get down to it" I was like, wtf, not into that shit. So I told her no way and she was so pleased that I just wanted to talk to her. We spent about 5 hours chatting. I only managed to speak to her once more after that and it turned out she had a very abusive partner who she was scared of. I have tried loads of times to find her and see if she is ok or not. Certain times like that stick with me for some reason.

Nice to meet you too.

 

[AtomicNewt]

I honestly don't know the answer to that. Surprising, with the amount of hallucinogens I've done, and the frequency. Shrooms have never, ever, given me a bad trip. Even when bad things happened, they didn't bother me as much. For a while, I was microdsoing daily for depression.

(...it works better than SSRIs & such.)

Really interested in the micro dosing, few solid sources mention it as being highly effective with depression. Beats random synthetics and is free! You recommend?

Agree shrooms are also fun recreationally but slightly nervous... Like so much in my life I always go hell for leather. Mistook someone describing a high dose for a normal dose and thought, well, I want to do it properly, so about tripled it. Can't really explain what happened and don't want to bore people with a low rent fear and loathing but it was beyond intense. Suffice to say the world stayed backwards for quite a while and I couldn't look at clocks for about a month as time was still doing crazy shit. Definitely interesting, although like many things I do, not wise.

 

[Circles]

Does anyone else feel like they've lived multiple lifetimes? Even on this site alone, so many users have come and go, it feels like forever since I've made an account. Oh, and it's lovely to meet you all :)

I don't want to believe in it because I hate the thought of living again, but I've given some thought into if for example the universe is a multi-infinite space that last forever right so given the timespan it could most plausibly happen via eternal reoccurrence. I've even felt deja vu where I felt I've lived this life already. It's nice to meet you again lovely!!!

 

[SinisterKid]

No half measures eh Newt

And now, please kindly explain that avatar of yours as I cannot make out the writing on the bottles. Meanwhile, I will listen to a little Dr Feelgood.

 

[Weeping Garbage Can]

My lifetime feels like its been very very long and yet it has passed by in the blink of a eye. I have known and forgotten more people than I can mention. I often wonder what happened to someone I knew for a short period of time. I once had a very long conversation with a woman from NZ. We were on some chat room set up and after a few pleasantries, she said, "So I suppose we had better get down to it" I was like, wtf, not into that shit. So I told her no way and she was so pleased that I just wanted to talk to her. We spent about 5 hours chatting. I only managed to speak to her once more after that and it turned out she had a very abusive partner who she was scared of. I have tried loads of times to find her and see if she is ok or not. Certain times like that stick with me for some reason.

Nice to meet you too.

Thank you very much for sharing, SinisterKid. I think it's lovely you both were able to chat, I can imagine that your kindness and time meant quite a bit to her. I also hope you're able to find her, and that she's safe.

I don't want to believe in it because I hate the thought of living again, but I've given some thought into if for example the universe is a multi-infinite space that last forever right so given the timespan it could most plausibly happen via eternal reoccurrence. I've even felt deja vu where I felt I've lived this life already. It's nice to meet you again lovely!!!

I need to look more into eternal reoccurance, but if you are correct, it's very nice to meet you once again too <3

 

[Circles]

Im in a mental fog cause of my migraine medicine. It leaves me tired and feeling shitty and more depressed than I already feel. Im tired of the endless loop of shitty sleeping and going to work. So yeah I feel like shit lol currently in the dark next to my cat. Glad you came out of your shell friend.

I'm sorry you're feeling this way dear, Is the job too much I take it? Don't answer that if you don't feel like it okay. I hope your cat gives you so much love. Many Hugs.
( っ ⇀ ⑃ ↼ )っ⊂( ⇀ ⑃ ↼ ⊂ )

 

[SinisterKid]

That was 15-20 yrs ago now, I wont ever find her as all I had was her screen name which is all I can use to search. But its instances like that which stand out for me in all the years I have been alive. It was over and done, 5 hours of my life and its stayed with me. Things I have done endlessly are instantly forgettable and they have been.

One Christmas eve, we were out from work for a drink and I was walking up to Chinatown where I live and there was a fella sitting in a doorway, obviously homeless. I crouched down and spoke to him and what a interesting guy he turned out to be. I talked with him for about 45 minutes, gave him some money and he was just so happy someone had acknowledged he existed. Again, a blink of the eye, but its stayed with me.

 

[DoomedxFromBirth]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way dear, Is the job too much I take it? Don't answer that if you don't feel like it okay. I hope your cat gives you so much love. Many Hugs.
( っ ⇀ ⑃ ↼ )っ⊂( ⇀ ⑃ ↼ ⊂ )

Ive been there for a while so Im used to it. And she does! She ones of the few things that make me happy. Shes my little fatty. Do you have any animals?

 

[SinisterKid]

Well folks, its been a very enjoyable thread to have been a part of but like all good things, for me it must come to a end.

Please take good care and stay safe and I look forward to doing it all again at some point in time.

Over and out

 

[Weeping Garbage Can]

@SinisterKid Thanks again for sharing, these moments you're describing give me some warmth :) As what you've said reminds me, talking with others and giving them time and courtesy and consideration can mean more than one may think.
@Circles I'm happy you came out of your shell too
@DoomedxFromBirth Aww I hope you both can continue to provide each other with love and affection <3

 

[Circles]

Ive been there for a while so Im used to it. And she does! She ones of the few things that make me happy. Shes my little fatty. Do you have any animals?

lol I do, my Pomeranian is my little beauty. Her name is Angel. Don't know if I can post any pics but here's the Bear-bear:

 

[Conflicted Cat]

Not such a boring day for me, Crash Team Racing Nitro Fueled just came out. Having a blast with it right now, but once the game's over, it'll be right back to depression. Better enjoy it while it lasts.

 

[inconsequential]

Really interested in the micro dosing, few solid sources mention it as being highly effective with depression. Beats random synthetics and is free! You recommend?

Agree shrooms are also fun recreationally but slightly nervous... Like so much in my life I always go hell for leather. Mistook someone describing a high dose for a normal dose and thought, well, I want to do it properly, so about tripled it. Can't really explain what happened and don't want to bore people with a low rent fear and loathing but it was beyond intense. Suffice to say the world stayed backwards for quite a while and I couldn't look at clocks for about a month as time was still doing crazy shit. Definitely interesting, although like many things I do, not wise.

I totally recommend it! Now, I don't drive because of epilepsy and a few other things, so I am certain my microdose is higher than other peoples'. But if I took around 0.2-0.3 in the morning, and again at night, I noticed a change (good!) in my mood, and I was able to sleep soundly for the first time in my life.

 

[Circles]

Well folks, its been a very enjoyable thread to have been a part of but like all good things, for me it must come to a end.

Please take good care and stay safe and I look forward to doing it all again at some point in time.

Over and out

Thank You so much for talking to me and keeping me company. I truly appreciate you for helping me pass the time a little bit easier. Hope you sleep well and have a goodnight. Many Hugs.
And that goes for all y'all, Thank You.

 

[DoomedxFromBirth]

@SinisterKid Thanks again for sharing, these moments you're describing give me some warmth :) As what you've said reminds me, talking with others and giving them time and courtesy and consideration can mean more than one may think.
@Circles I'm happy you came out of your shell too
@DoomedxFromBirth Aww I hope you both can continue to provide each other with love and affection <3

Its been 11 years, I have her tattooed on my arm shes helped me through alot :)

lol I do, my Pomeranian is my little beauty. Her name is Angel. Don't know if I can post any pics but here's the Bear-bear:
View attachment 12418

Ommmg a boy? Really adorable its so floofy!

 

[Circles]

Its been 11 years, I have her tattooed on my arm shes helped me through alot :)

Ommmg a boy? Really adorable its so floofy!

No a girl, I really have a hard time not trying to squeeze her cause of how cute she is lol. Hope your night going well, has the feelings lessened? Anything for dinner?

 

[lululoo]

Sorry for everyone's struggles today. My day sucked. I cried while walking down the street. I only left the house to blow more money on food. Can't control myself anymore. I guess I might hit my high weight again. It shouldn't matter if I'm really going soon, but who knows if I will. (Sorry for the obnoxious body issues crap, it's just a permanent part of my psyche. I will always be tortured by it.)

I had some okay bits of days when I was first off work. Now I'm in the bell jar. But I will never go back to work. Too physically ill. So I will finally CTB instead, hopefully.

Hate my life, my mind, my body.

 

[Circles]

Sorry for everyone's struggles today. My day sucked. I cried while walking down the street. I only left the house to blow more money on food. Can't control myself anymore. I guess I might hit my high weight again. It shouldn't matter if I'm really going soon, but who knows if I will. (Sorry for the obnoxious body issues crap, it's just a permanent part of my psyche. I will always be tortured by it.)

I had some okay bits of days when I was first off work. Now I'm in the bell jar. But I will never go back to work. Too physically ill. So I will finally CTB instead, hopefully.

Hate my life, my mind, my body.

I'm sorry you had a tough day dear. And I completely understand you, I'm not completely comfortable with my body either, but I don't care. It's just something that lingers for no reason, always that self-doubt. I don't see nothing wrong with treating yourself given the circumstances. I'm doing the same I'm just biding my time until I summon the courage to do it if at all. I feel pathetic thinking I want to kill myself over not working again but holy damn it just too much hassle and stress. We're the only species that has to pay to live an unwanted life we didn't ask to be a part of. Where's the logic in that? I sure don't know.
Many Hugs to you though.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I was doing okay today but then got chewed out by my dad over Skype. We normally chat a bit daily and get on well but he had some criticisms aimed at me and my life which sort of pissed me off and threw me for a loop. He has no idea how bad I struggle with my various issues and symptoms. I tell my family all the time if I could put them in my mind and body for five minutes they'd run screaming for the hills. I just wish people would fuck off if they're not going to be supportive. Maybe that's not fair of me but I have no desire for any more ugliness at this stage of my life. I don't have the resilience or energy for it.

 

[not_a_robot]

My eyes hurt really bad today and I think I might have food poisoning from some gas-station peanut butter goddammit.

 

[lululoo]

I'm sorry you had a tough day dear. And I completely understand you, I'm not completely comfortable with my body either, but I don't care. It's just something that lingers for no reason, always that self-doubt. I don't see nothing wrong with treating yourself given the circumstances. I'm doing the same I'm just biding my time until I summon the courage to do it if at all. I feel pathetic thinking I want to kill myself over not working again but holy damn it just too much hassle and stress. We're the only species that has to pay to live an unwanted life we didn't ask to be a part of. Where's the logic in that? I sure don't know.
Many Hugs to you though.

Thank you, this helps me a lot to hear your kind words. Thanks for starting the thread. Hugs back.

I was doing okay today but then got chewed out by my dad over Skype. We normally chat a bit daily and get on well but he had some criticisms aimed at me and my life which sort of pissed me off and threw me for a loop. He has no idea how bad I struggle with my various issues and symptoms. I tell my family all the time if I could put them in my mind and body for five minutes they'd run screaming for the hills. I just wish people would fuck off if they're not going to be supportive. Maybe that's not fair of me but I have no desire for any more ugliness at this stage of my life. I don't have the resilience or energy for it.

I think it's completely fair to not have time for people who should be supporting you, but are rude and dismissive instead.

 

[Circles]

I was doing okay today but then got chewed out by my dad over Skype. We normally chat a bit daily and get on well but he had some criticisms aimed at me and my life which sort of pissed me off and threw me for a loop. He has no idea how bad I struggle with my various issues and symptoms. I tell my family all the time if I could put them in my mind and body for five minutes they'd run screaming for the hills. I just wish people would fuck off if they're not going to be supportive. Maybe that's not fair of me but I have no desire for any more ugliness at this stage of my life. I don't have the resilience or energy for it.

Man I get you, after a certain point you just can't take anymore bullshit or even care to listen. I'm sorry you went through that with your father. He just can't possibly understand but I'd say he chooses to be ignorant of your suffering. I don't have a dad, but my grandpa is the same and even my mother to some extent. Always expecting you to keep up, to push through, to do this or that. It's annoying, I don't know what they expect of me either at this point.
Hope your night is tolerable compared to earlier? Hugs.

 

[AhG]

gas-station peanut butter goddammit.

PEANUT BUTTER. Did you at least have jelly to?

 

[sólstafir]

I was doing okay today but then got chewed out by my dad over Skype. We normally chat a bit daily and get on well but he had some criticisms aimed at me and my life which sort of pissed me off and threw me for a loop. He has no idea how bad I struggle with my various issues and symptoms. I tell my family all the time if I could put them in my mind and body for five minutes they'd run screaming for the hills. I just wish people would fuck off if they're not going to be supportive. Maybe that's not fair of me but I have no desire for any more ugliness at this stage of my life. I don't have the resilience or energy for it.

Ahh.. I'm sorry that happened between you and your father. My life is filled with these little moments of criticism towards me, from every member of family, and none of them have experienced psychosis or anything else I've been going through and still do which makes my experience of life so different from their 'normal' experience, and it actually sucks that even if I die, they never understood it thinking I don't know what about me, according to their limited understanding. What can I say to help you, is that time will lessen the pain, I hope already in the evening you will feel better since this thing with your father will be in the past. Try to forget it, you didn't choose your issues and you deal with it as well as possible already :) Sending you good thoughts..

 

[GinaIsReady]

My eyes hurt really bad today and I think I might have food poisoning from some gas-station peanut butter goddammit.

I hope you are feeling better.

 

[Ladylethal]

I'm okay...my mom was nice to me today...I' have so much to do before I CTB but I'm too depressed to do anything

 

[Help_Me]

Hi, Circles and everyone ! Pretty bad today, as my daily job became really, really hard few weeks ago. I also experience a slight panic attack right now. But yea, I had much worse days, so it's still okay for me. Hope you guys are doing better