Discussion How would you make the most of your last year?

[Maormer]

I can't go yet. I need to last at least one more year so my death doesn't effect my sisters wedding. As much as there is a desire in me to curl up and embrace the comfort that comes with a certain kind of sadness, I feel as though it would be better to end things on a good note. I don't have much money, I don't live anywhere interesting, and I still need to go to classes to keep up appearances, so there are some restrictions for me unfortunately, but I want to give myself a proper send off. I want to spend time with friends, go to concerts, cook good food, spend time in the woods that I love so much. I want my last memories to be good ones. What should I do to make the most of my last year? What would you do?

 

[getoutgirl]

Honestly that sounds fantastic.
Sure I'd do a bucket list of all I'd want to do and experience, and then I'd live it. Way better than just to curl up in misery for a whole nother year.
Maybe that mentality can allow the sadness to go "aight I'll let you experience this joyful things but you gotta prommy after that we are done" because I know sometimes it doesn't even allow you to enjoy the things you like about life. But having that finality in mind could help.
It's also maybe a bit presumptious or too hopeful, but there is the chance you find something worth staying for while on that send off. Which would be scary on its on way, but who knows.
Whatever it is fuck it, have a last blast, it's a good idea <3

 

[Maormer]

Honestly that sounds fantastic.
Sure I'd do a bucket list of all I'd want to do and experience, and then I'd live it. Way better than just to curl up in misery for a whole nother year.
Maybe that mentality can allow the sadness to go "aight I'll let you experience this joyful things but you gotta prommy after that we are done" because I know sometimes it doesn't even allow you to enjoy the things you like about life. But having that finality in mind could help.
It's also maybe a bit presumptious or too hopeful, but there is the chance you find something worth staying for while on that send off. Which would be scary on its on way, but who knows.
Whatever it is fuck it, have a last blast, it's a good idea <3

honestly the idea makes me fearful and hopeful that it might make me change my mind. If i get better as a result of this then i will be in less pain and that would be great, but at the same time the likely hood of me returning to this state on day makes me fear id be delaying the inevitable and prolonging pain. Even when these feelings leave they have had a tendency to come back with vengeance. But regardless i think it is the right decision. I've already set my mind on surviving one more year for my sister's sake so why should i suffer in the mean time yah know? i might as well make good final memories. I think that having the finality has freed me up to enjoy things more too. When i feel horrible and want to kill myself (which admittedly is most days) it helps to tell myself "don't fret, you only need to last one more year. Soon you can rest". Ive already planned a vacation to the west coast to visit my best friend and to be honest had i not felt that my life will soon be over i do not think i would have done so. Its also motivated me to engage in more art. I like to craft clothing and jewelry and i think it would be nice to make people i love gifts before i leave. No matter how it goes i think this will be good for me

 

[Subhumano]

Gamble, maybe you hit the jackpot and can buy happiness and not kill your yourself, you have nothing to lose.