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Maormer

Maormer

Member
May 21, 2024
45
IMG 1158
I can't go yet. I need to last at least one more year so my death doesn't effect my sisters wedding. As much as there is a desire in me to curl up and embrace the comfort that comes with a certain kind of sadness, I feel as though it would be better to end things on a good note. I don't have much money, I don't live anywhere interesting, and I still need to go to classes to keep up appearances, so there are some restrictions for me unfortunately, but I want to give myself a proper send off. I want to spend time with friends, go to concerts, cook good food, spend time in the woods that I love so much. I want my last memories to be good ones. What should I do to make the most of my last year? What would you do?
 
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getoutgirl

getoutgirl

got out the site <3
Mar 17, 2025
558
Honestly that sounds fantastic.
Sure I'd do a bucket list of all I'd want to do and experience, and then I'd live it. Way better than just to curl up in misery for a whole nother year.
Maybe that mentality can allow the sadness to go "aight I'll let you experience this joyful things but you gotta prommy after that we are done" because I know sometimes it doesn't even allow you to enjoy the things you like about life. But having that finality in mind could help.
It's also maybe a bit presumptious or too hopeful, but there is the chance you find something worth staying for while on that send off. Which would be scary on its on way, but who knows.
Whatever it is fuck it, have a last blast, it's a good idea <3
 
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Maormer

Maormer

Member
May 21, 2024
45
Honestly that sounds fantastic.
Sure I'd do a bucket list of all I'd want to do and experience, and then I'd live it. Way better than just to curl up in misery for a whole nother year.
Maybe that mentality can allow the sadness to go "aight I'll let you experience this joyful things but you gotta prommy after that we are done" because I know sometimes it doesn't even allow you to enjoy the things you like about life. But having that finality in mind could help.
It's also maybe a bit presumptious or too hopeful, but there is the chance you find something worth staying for while on that send off. Which would be scary on its on way, but who knows.
Whatever it is fuck it, have a last blast, it's a good idea <3
honestly the idea makes me fearful and hopeful that it might make me change my mind. If i get better as a result of this then i will be in less pain and that would be great, but at the same time the likely hood of me returning to this state on day makes me fear id be delaying the inevitable and prolonging pain. Even when these feelings leave they have had a tendency to come back with vengeance. But regardless i think it is the right decision. I've already set my mind on surviving one more year for my sister's sake so why should i suffer in the mean time yah know? i might as well make good final memories. I think that having the finality has freed me up to enjoy things more too. When i feel horrible and want to kill myself (which admittedly is most days) it helps to tell myself "don't fret, you only need to last one more year. Soon you can rest". Ive already planned a vacation to the west coast to visit my best friend and to be honest had i not felt that my life will soon be over i do not think i would have done so. Its also motivated me to engage in more art. I like to craft clothing and jewelry and i think it would be nice to make people i love gifts before i leave. No matter how it goes i think this will be good for me

7bebe21a7bb574079732966c4ef82f0e
 
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Subhumano

Subhumano

I dont have friends
Apr 20, 2025
178
Gamble, maybe you hit the jackpot and can buy happiness and not kill your yourself, you have nothing to lose.
 
LostLily

LostLily

Why do I exist?
Nov 18, 2024
755
Been making sure to attend all the events and concerts and parties I can because I was hoping this was my last year

Alas the SN was confiscated and my hope was taken away with it.
 
A

always_sad

Member
Feb 6, 2025
58
I'm not sure how much time there is left for me, but I will live my last year(s) normally. No bucket list, no crazy events, no trying out new things. I am okay with living a dull isolated life
 
Griever

Griever

SN
May 1, 2025
460
I don't know when I'm going to die, but I spend my money on things I want and have fun
 
bankai

bankai

Visionary
Mar 16, 2025
2,340
I have been wanting to travel a bit. Mainly go to Japan. My couple of friends though are too busy and unable to take holidays at the same time that I will be free. I'm considering solo travel but I know that would be boring as well.
 
hereornot

hereornot

Freedom
May 16, 2024
274
Sleeping
Sleeping
 
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divinemistress87

divinemistress87

Angelic
Jan 1, 2024
4,919
I would love to travel but that probably wont happen. Probably just hang with my dog as much as possible
 
Rynalia

Rynalia

くたばりぞこない
Apr 22, 2025
305
Sleeping
Sleeping

This all the way. This is what I would do.

Let me just drown in a sea of pillows and blankets on a soft bed.

Let me make up for the countless hours spent wasting away doing things that benefitted everyone but myself.
 

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