neverwashere

neverwashere

Self sabotaging to cope with it all
Apr 25, 2023
73
I read a fanfic in which someone ctb'd by slitting their wrists. I've struggled with sh in the past, but I thought that since its been so long, I wouldn't get triggered. Sadly, I was wrong, and now I am fighting the urge to break my month long sh-free streak. I honestly wouldn't be writing this, but I'm going to a wedding on Saturday and will be wearing a shortsleeved dress meaning I really need to not give in to the urges this time. How do I stop myself from going through with it?
 
TeflonMummy

TeflonMummy

Member
Apr 1, 2023
45
I wanted to start by saying congratulations on the streak and I'm definitely rooting for you to continue it. Self harm often is a coping method we adopt because we've run out of ways to cope with a situation and are seeking a distraction from circumstance. The best way to stop selfing harming for me has been to continually adopt better and healthier coping mechanisms. I started with the opposite of self-harm; self-care, and it's been a good way to turn my feelings of hatred towards myself into feelings of self-love, which can help you carry yourself out of a lot of bad situations.

If you don't want to try self-care, there are some other options though. I would definitely remove any objects you use for self-harm out of your living space if you can, or make accessing them more challenging so you think about what you are doing long enough to remove the impulsive response to self harm.

If there are any hobbies you haven't done in awhile, I'd also recommend trying to pick them back up again, or trying new hobbies if that's not the case. They're a really good distraction for me, especially researching new or esoteric things. It helps a lot if the hobby you chose produces things you can show and talk about to other people, or things that help you express yourself, such as art (whether through drawing, painting, making music, sculpting, writing, welding even (that was an interesting one to try personally)).

Finding someone you can trust to talk to when you feel like you have to self harm is also a good idea, though be really careful with this piece of advice because there's also a good chance some people aren't as trust worthy as they seemed.

I don't know too much about your situation, so I'm sorry if any of this advice isn't particularly helpful to you, although I hope there is something you can incorporate here to help you get through Saturday. Wishing you the best of luck.
 
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Doombox

Doombox

Who knows, who cares
Apr 7, 2022
376
I was once advised to go to the freezer and clench one or two hands around some ice cubes until it hurts so that the pain can do the job without leaving permanent injury. I think if I recall correctly the purpose of the pain is the endorphin release when the pain stops, which you can get from the ice.
 
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neverwashere

neverwashere

Self sabotaging to cope with it all
Apr 25, 2023
73
I wanted to start by saying congratulations on the streak and I'm definitely rooting for you to continue it. Self harm often is a coping method we adopt because we've run out of ways to cope with a situation and are seeking a distraction from circumstance. The best way to stop selfing harming for me has been to continually adopt better and healthier coping mechanisms. I started with the opposite of self-harm; self-care, and it's been a good way to turn my feelings of hatred towards myself into feelings of self-love, which can help you carry yourself out of a lot of bad situations.

If you don't want to try self-care, there are some other options though. I would definitely remove any objects you use for self-harm out of your living space if you can, or make accessing them more challenging so you think about what you are doing long enough to remove the impulsive response to self harm.

If there are any hobbies you haven't done in awhile, I'd also recommend trying to pick them back up again, or trying new hobbies if that's not the case. They're a really good distraction for me, especially researching new or esoteric things. It helps a lot if the hobby you chose produces things you can show and talk about to other people, or things that help you express yourself, such as art (whether through drawing, painting, making music, sculpting, writing, welding even (that was an interesting one to try personally)).

Finding someone you can trust to talk to when you feel like you have to self harm is also a good idea, though be really careful with this piece of advice because there's also a good chance some people aren't as trust worthy as they seemed.

I don't know too much about your situation, so I'm sorry if any of this advice isn't particularly helpful to you, although I hope there is something you can incorporate here to help you get through Saturday. Wishing you the best of luck.
thank you so much for this, it genuinely means a lot! I thankfully managed to get past the worst of the urges through a FaceTime call with my best friend :)
 
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