venin
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- Jul 28, 2023
- 757
There were times when the bus was on my mind all day long. Right now I would say it's about 10 to 20 times a day
I'm sorry it's that fkt up rnAll day long at the moment.
I used to watch serial killers docs and even gore videos sometimes when nothing would work, just to numb myselfToo much for me to count. Started distracting myself with entertainment but it's not really cutting it for me.
Me neitherAll the time, I'm always wishing for the true peace of eternal sleep. For me the only relief lies in death, it's the only true escape from all suffering and harm in an existence I never wished to endure in the first place.
At least you make something worthwhile out of itPretty often, after all, is one of my main sources when I make art.
I hope you find peaceAll day, every day. I have a noose ready if I can't wait long enough to save up for a gun.
Glad it still worksAll the time, but I try to distract myself and most of the time it works.
Yeah, it's torturingAll the stuff I'm doing recently related to my suicide. I'm working to complete my ctb plan, I'm searching all the day about methods and how to do it properly and circumstances of failure. My method will be SN probably and i have doubts about it now, it's so exhausted fear of failure is hell.
It's really sad that our life gets so bad that we have to turn to these kinds of thingsIt used to be an unpleasant tought but now it's a message that not everything will stay bad. If things don't improve in the next 16 days (end of month) I'll fix it myself. To answer, i haven't counted, but it's all the time.