As men, we're men to "man up", be assertive, dominant and successful. We are the sex that is supposed to "rescue" a woman and be the stable rock in her life. We are supposed to have our "shit together". Men who don't meet this yardstick are called losers. Men who don't have a career by a certain age are called "losers". "Valid" reasons for not dating a man include:
- he doesn't earn enough
- his job/he is low-value/-status
- he lives with his mum and dad
- he doesn't drive
- he isn't physically attractive/tall
The standard that we are held to - by everyone (by men (friends, coworkers) and women) - is tough if you can't even make it onto the first step. And cuz men are so competitive, you get a clear sense of when you are failing.
Are any other men out there actual scrubs, losers or low-value men (as determined by FemaleDatingStrategy) or by society in general? Do you have friends who boast about their career-ladder progression, their moving into a (new, bigger) home, their getting into a new relationship and how their lover adores their virility and success? It's part of why I want to CTB - because everything I've tried in life has resulted in failure. I am literally the loser that TV shows used to talk about when I was growing up.
Were you successful at one time and then lost it or were you always a loser?
I feel like my whole life has been watching other men (or people in general) move on through different life-stages, while I stay stagnant and trying in vein. I can't even bring myself to use Facebook anymore cuz it's full of people who have full lives, meanwhile my life is like a teenager's, in terms of achievement. In fact, probably behind them too. No matter what I try, I fail. It seems like there is only one way out of failing as a man, having poor mental health and being a fucking loser.
NOTE:
1. I don't want this to be a discussion about which sex has it worse. Women have their own struggles that are offtopic here. I just want to talk to men whose life is going nowhere and who are losers.
2. I don't want to get strawmanned into "a relationship isn't the be all end all". I am not talking about just relationships. I am talking about how men are measured in terms of success, and how men feel any sense of accomplishment.
3. I don't want anyone coming in here saying: "Men cannot discuss their problems! This makes me feel as if you are blaming others!". This is not to blame others. This isn't about you right now. This is about men not being able to achieve goals because of lack of intelligence, because of depression and anxiety, because of constant knockbacks, rejections and poor mental health.
To any men replying, please just focus on the on-topic posts and ignore anything off-topic
