Help How do you manage not to relapse and return to self-harm?

[pieceoffox]

I have years of experience dealing with self-harm; I have managed to achieve long periods of remission, but I always end up relapsing. Do you have any strategies for preventing the urge to self-harm from arising?

 

[GroundControl]

I'm in the same boat. I'm 2 years and 6 months clean. I wish I could say there was a sure strategy for stopping that urge, but the honest truth is that it'll always be there. Like with any addiction, those urges will ease over time, but crop up once in a while. The only thing to do is push through — because at the end of the day, it's a choice. A choice you gotta make every day, between doing it, and not doing it. I wish it were different. I wish you luck, man. You aren't alone.

 

[bagel12]

the urges never fully went away for me but through trial and error i have figured out how to calm myself down when i want to sh. and i have figured out a variety of alternative behaviors that i can do instead of sh. dbt skills helped a lot too.

when i want to sh:
1. being tired/hungry/etc makes sh urges worse, so i evaluate if my basic needs are met, and if not, i fix that.
2. i evaluate what my 5 senses want. like do i want silence or loud music? do i want spicy food, something sour, something crunchy? would lying in bed with a weighted blanket help me, or do i need an intense workout, or an ice cold shower? it can help to have lists of options for each of the 5 senses
3. i evaluate what my mind wants. do i want to distract myself by reading/watching something/doing an activity? do i want to process my feelings (verbally or in writing)? do i just want to sleep?
4. if i still feel a strong sh urge after some time, i take meds which make it bearable 95% of the time
5. if i do relent and decide to sh i practice harm reduction techniques

im sorry that youre going through this, relapsing really sucks. please be kind to yourself. and give yourself kudos for your successes, too--long periods of remission is amazing. it's a ton of effort and very admirable

 

[pieceoffox]

the urges never fully went away for me but through trial and error i have figured out how to calm myself down when i want to sh. and i have figured out a variety of alternative behaviors that i can do instead of sh. dbt skills helped a lot too.

when i want to sh:
1. being tired/hungry/etc makes sh urges worse, so i evaluate if my basic needs are met, and if not, i fix that.
2. i evaluate what my 5 senses want. like do i want silence or loud music? do i want spicy food, something sour, something crunchy? would lying in bed with a weighted blanket help me, or do i need an intense workout, or an ice cold shower? it can help to have lists of options for each of the 5 senses
3. i evaluate what my mind wants. do i want to distract myself by reading/watching something/doing an activity? do i want to process my feelings (verbally or in writing)? do i just want to sleep?
4. if i still feel a strong sh urge after some time, i take meds which make it bearable 95% of the time
5. if i do relent and decide to sh i practice harm reduction techniques

im sorry that youre going through this, relapsing really sucks. please be kind to yourself. and give yourself kudos for your successes, too--long periods of remission is amazing. it's a ton of effort and very admirable

Thank you! I hope I'll be able to prevent the urge to sh more often

 

[bagel12]

Thank you! I hope I'll be able to prevent the urge to sh more often

you got this! just remember that every day is a fresh start, and celebrate small wins!