How do you know when you're ready to ctb?

[vizualbandtit]

I've been cripplingly disassociated for years now beginning very early on in my life, and i really want to let go. But i don't know if I'm ready if that makes sense? Derealization really messes up my perception of reality and I just need some help sorting this out. So to whomever who are ready to ctb, how did you know you were sure? And especially, how do you deal with knowing you'll hurt the people who love you?. I'm just really tired and over life, I've given life a chance way too many times and I want to ctb but i just need to know how to be sure.

 

[lacrimosa]

I can only speak for myself. But, I've exhausted all of my options with many run throughs with psychologists, therapists, counsellors, rehab, and a myriad of medications.

I'm going to try ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) as a last resort before I make the final, final decision to CTB. I know I've posted a lot on here that I am going to CTB and I am 99% sure and am at peace with it... but I'm a fighter and have been ever since I was 15. So, I won't really know until I've exhausted all possible options.

Even though my mental anguish is at the moment, unbearable, ECT, however, might work.

So, keep on trying and looking into different ways to alleviate your suffering. You never know, you could luck out.

Then, if you find out nothing works, you can make your choice but I must add, new medical advancements are coming out every day to help those with mental illness. Also, ask for help from others. There are many programs available in many countries that will help you out.

Anyways, this is just my opinion and not advice in any way as it's your life.

 

[vizualbandtit]

I can only speak for myself. But, I've exhausted all of my options with many run throughs with psychologists, therapists, counsellors, rehab, and a myriad of medications.

I'm going to try ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) as a last resort before I make the final, final decision to CTB. I know I've posted a lot on here that I am going to CTB and I am 99% sure and am at peace with it... but I'm a fighter and have been ever since I was 15. So, I won't really know until I've exhausted all possible options.

Even though my mental anguish is at the moment, unbearable, ECT, however, might work.

So, keep on trying and looking into different ways to alleviate your suffering. You never know, you could luck out.

Then, if you find out nothing works, you can make your choice but I must add, new medical advancements are coming out every day to help those with mental illness. Also, ask for help from others. There are many programs available in many countries that will help you out.

Anyways, this is just my opinion and not advice in any way as it's your life.

Thank you for sharing, this is really helpful. I especially relate to the fighter part since I've been surviving for well over 10 years now, so I wouldn't know until I've used up all my options.

 

[dinosavr]

What's important is that you probably will never feel 100% ready to leave the world. For most of us, death, no matter how familiar, it still remains the most undiscovered mystery of all and you're aware that you might be very much wrong about what's going to happen after death + what's going to happen if you don't die. That's tough and I started believing that it's something we'll never fully achieve and that it just needs to be done despite those thoughts, with a maximum possible avoidance of risk of survival.

 

[rozeske]

When you start looking forward to death more than any possibility of your life.

 

[Roadrunner]

I can only speak for myself. But, I've exhausted all of my options with many run throughs with psychologists, therapists, counsellors, rehab, and a myriad of medications.

I'm going to try ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) as a last resort before I make the final, final decision to CTB. I know I've posted a lot on here that I am going to CTB and I am 99% sure and am at peace with it... but I'm a fighter and have been ever since I was 15. So, I won't really know until I've exhausted all possible options.

Even though my mental anguish is at the moment, unbearable, ECT, however, might work.

So, keep on trying and looking into different ways to alleviate your suffering. You never know, you could luck out.

Then, if you find out nothing works, you can make your choice but I must add, new medical advancements are coming out every day to help those with mental illness. Also, ask for help from others. There are many programs available in many countries that will help you out.

Anyways, this is just my opinion and not advice in any way as it's your life.

I'm very curious how the ECT works out for you. I find meds just numb my depression.

 

[vizualbandtit]

This is exactly what i think too, but i just wanted to see how people have made their peace with their death in other different ways, though we never truly will make peace with death.

What's important is that you probably will never feel 100% ready to leave the world. For most of us, death, no matter how familiar, it still remains the most undiscovered mystery of all and you're aware that you might be very much wrong about what's going to happen after death + what's going to happen if you don't die. That's tough and I started believing that it's something we'll never fully achieve and that it just needs to be done despite those thoughts, with a maximum possible avoidance of risk of survival