Help How do you actually talk about your issues?

[d-tea]

I've always struggled with expressing my feelings and not feeling ridiculous because I am aware that often times, they do not make sense.
Talking about it makes me cringe and I can't seem to get a word out; no matter how close to a person I am. I can't imagine how I'd bring it up with a professional.

I've managed to write down things in the moment, but I struggle with accessing and describing those feelings afterwards, I just can't seem to remember what was going on in my head. Additionally, I have somewhat learned to express myself in English, but struggle with doing so and being emotionally vulnerable while speaking my native language.

I've talked to a psychiatrist before but have only been able to explain my life circumstances (which are not bad at all) and physical symptoms like self harm, and they gained the impression that I was actually pretty stable when I was absolutely not, causing me to never go back after my first session because I tried to ctb shortly after.

How do you deal with this?

 

[SVEN]

I've learned to lie to them. Having found out the hard way that they will say and act in any deceitfull manner to get you to comply with their fixed opinions.
The only reason they want you to be open and frank with them is to more successfully manipulate or coerce you into falling into line. That's my view and experience anyway.
Best wishes.