Help How do I get someone to stop using this site?

[wealllovesodium]

I know this is a pro choice forum but my boyfriend started using this more often and I'm genuinely starting to get worried. I know he struggles with stuff at home. But recently he's made a post about killing himself and getting help on how to do it. I really don't want to lose him. I love him too much to let him do this.

 

[wham311]

I know this is a pro choice forum but my boyfriend started using this more often and I'm genuinely starting to get worried. I know he struggles with stuff at home. But recently he's made a post about killing himself and getting help on how to do it. I really don't want to lose him. I love him too much to let him do this.

Imagine how much he's suffering to want to do this.

 

[vitbar]

For me I'm here less often when I have less reason to be.

Have you spoken with him about your concern?

 

[whywere]

Take a nice walk and sit down together and watch nature and let your mind, body and spirit, relax. Then just start talking/asking him heartfelt question.

If it was me, I would lay it all out and tell the person just how very much that they are to me, long term.

Just think about being able to sit across from him, in a decade or two having breakfast and knowing how each other thinks and acts without having to say a word, tell him that.

Always close one's eyes and see the future and tell him that that future includes him each and every day.

Now if he has mental health issues, be VERY supportive and tell him that anything and everything can be worked out TOGETHER, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder.

You sound like such a wonderfully warm and VERY caring person and do not hold anything back, TELL HIM, just how much he means to you and that there is NOTHING that the both of you can NOT over come together.

Hugs, love and well wishes to you,

Walter

 

[milkteacrown]

If you're comfortable with DMing me, I'd love to have a private conversation about this. I think I can offer insight.

 

[humantool]

I know this is a pro choice forum but my boyfriend started using this more often and I'm genuinely starting to get worried. I know he struggles with stuff at home. But recently he's made a post about killing himself and getting help on how to do it. I really don't want to lose him. I love him too much to let him do this.

Well, first off, you are right, this is a pro-choice forum, you have to respect his decisions just as you would want him to respect yours. This forum is about freedom of choice, and that includes the choice to end one's life if that's what he truly wants. You can support him, listen to him, and be there for him but in the end, it's his life and his choice. If he wants to talk about ending his life then listen and be there for him, but don't try to talk him out of it, that's not what being pro choice is about

 

[wham311]

Well, first off, you are right, this is a pro-choice forum, you have to respect his decisions just as you would want him to respect yours. This forum is about freedom of choice, and that includes the choice to end one's life if that's what he truly wants. You can support him, listen to him, and be there for him but in the end, it's his life and his choice. If he wants to talk about ending his life then listen and be there for him, but don't try to talk him out of it, that's not what being pro choice is about

had a friend tell me how helpful he was by being there for me by guilt tripping me into not killing myself.

I didn't fucking ask you to make me feel guilty abit it. I want to DIE. Its the opposite of what I want, friendo. Just making me feel worse about it

 

[humantool]

had a friend tell me how helpful he was by being there for me by guilt tripping me into not killing myself.

I didn't fucking ask you to make me feel guilty abit it. I want to DIE. Its the opposite of what I want, friendo. Just making me feel worse about it

I didn't understand shit of what you said but I agree

 

[EternalShore]

idk about him, but I know that many people here including me find this place more beneficial to their mental health than negative~ That being said, I also know how tough it is for someone you love to use this place and even commit sewer slide as a result too, so I completely understand why you wish for him to get off of here and getting better form his sewer slidal ideation~ >_< That being said, he's already found this place and presumably, a method (meaning that he got everything he needs for sewer slide from his place already), but he has also trusted you with the knowledge about it~ :) so he clearly cares about you, and as you hope, may choose to live for you~ :)

btw, I'd recommend posting a few more messages in order to unlock dm's and talk to @/milkteacrown about it~ :) idk for sure but based on prior things that have happened to me, I don't think we're allowed to encourage you to do anything in public that involves changing another person's opinion about anything whatsoever~

For me I'm here less often when I have less reason to be.

huh, weird~ I tend to come here regardless! xD And usually, I'm here more when I'm less overwhelmed [because I have more free time, and I like this place enough to come on during that free time :)]! xD

 

[wealllovesodium]

If you're comfortable with DMing me, I'd love to have a private conversation about this. I think I can offer insight.

I tried dming you but I still don't how this works, if there's any other way I can reach out to you I would be thankful

 

[darksouls]

I tried dming you but I still don't how this works, if there's any other way I can reach out to you I would be thankful

you have to write more messages then you will be unlocked for privat chat

 

[milkteacrown]

I tried dming you but I still don't how this works, if there's any other way I can reach out to you I would be thankful

Ah, I'm sorry about that. Then, I will just share my opinion, although it will be controversial on this site.

I think you are right to be worried about him and his coping mechanisms. While I believe in everyone's right to suicide, I also believe that suicide should be the very last option and not a choice made impulsively. I think getting him off this site entirely might be a challenge, but you could try seeing if you can give him a viable replacement so he eases off on his own and see if that helps him.

I'm not sure what the case is for him, but suicide is considered a taboo topic; most suicidal people fear (rightfully) that they will just be dragged against their will to a ward if they're too honest about their thoughts. This place is a refuge for people who believe they should have the right to discuss this subject openly and connect with others on it, which is something you yourself can provide for him as well. Does he seem receptive to discussing suicide in real life? Do you feel comfortable engaging with the subject with him calmly, as much as it hurts?

Also, many others use SaSu to feel less alone and connect with others struggling with mental health. Has he ever tried or considered something like group therapy, which might lead him to others who are similarly open about their mental health concerns? It's not enough for me, and I'm sure it's not enough to many others here as well, but some people genuinely don't know much about the resources at their disposal.

 

[wealllovesodium]

you have to write more messages then you will be unlocked for privat chat

Ah, I'm sorry about that. Then, I will just share my opinion, although it will be controversial on this site.

I think you are right to be worried about him and his coping mechanisms. While I believe in everyone's right to suicide, I also believe that suicide should be the very last option and not a choice made impulsively. I think getting him off this site entirely might be a challenge, but you could try seeing if you can give him a viable replacement so he eases off on his own and see if that helps him.

I'm not sure what the case is for him, but suicide is considered a taboo topic; most suicidal people fear (rightfully) that they will just be dragged against their will to a ward if they're too honest about their thoughts. This place is a refuge for people who believe they should have the right to discuss this subject openly and connect with others on it, which is something you yourself can provide for him as well. Does he seem receptive to discussing suicide in real life? Do you feel comfortable engaging with the subject with him calmly, as much as it hurts?

Also, many others use SaSu to feel less alone and connect with others struggling with mental health. Has he ever tried or considered something like group therapy, which might lead him to others who are similarly open about their mental health concerns? It's not enough for me, and I'm sure it's not enough to many others here as well, but some people genuinely don't know much about the resources at their disposal.

I'm always ok to talk to him about what's going on, and I wouldn't forcefully send him to a ward, I physically can't considering my relationship with his family. I'll try to talk to him about alternatives and try to provide him with as many resources as I possibly can. Thank you for your insights.