I am abstinent 16.25-50 years.  Completely of touch.  I had a sex abuse issue.  I never recovered.  Why I'm on here.  I had others prior but they didn't cause me PTSD or to become psych and imprisoned in my bown body.
I can't even turn on.  I'm 100% incapable of it.  Just overworked, overworked, overworked, felt nothing, self-harmed in private, couldn't recognize myself.
I used to be a cute young girl.  Sortof cute.
Lost track of all of that, an abusive man got stuck inside of my body when that happened. I turned crazy, self-harmed, became a zombie, felt like a robot. had no real emotions, everything became a tennis match of mental abuse.  I couldn't be bothered.  Shell shocked after that.  It wrecked my life :(  I didn't know that that could happen.  You become jailed in yourself.  It really fucking sucks.