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Letmego. Please

Letmego. Please

Wizard
Nov 18, 2018
619
So i declined to attend my last few appts, but just for slight amusement purposes today i will attend my shrink - a - dink.

Being as I'm in the Uk, & in a region that has bloody crap MH services that can't even help the acutely unwell i fully expect to be discharged as being no longer the type of punter they help, that's fine, they are at most an illusion of help anyway & at their worst pretend punters don't exist for months on end unless you are the type to phone up & complain. I am not that type lol

So if the conversation gets anywhere near where my mood is at, which chances are it will not as why invite a conversation you have no interest in the answer to anyway. I will tell her, this is shit, i am tired of rebuilding a life only to have it come crashing back down again, the suicide attempts it causes, the struggle to rebuild another different life only for it to happen again, rinse & repeat.

The Hell is like sliding down a dark well, you never know quite how near you are to the bottom, but the light at the top gets smaller & you know that when you do hit the bottom you will attempt to die, how would anybody who has been through that multiple times want to keep doing over & over again?

But like i said i doubt the subject will come up, hey hoo.
 
Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,705
I hope it'll be as worthwhile as my favourite consultation: I had to wait three months for an appoinment and all the doctor did was read me a bad translation of Jabberwocky off the internet. Then he took a phone call and cancelled the rest of the hour.

Shrinks: Gotta love 'em
 
not_a_robot

not_a_robot

"i hope the leaving is joyful, & never to return"
May 30, 2019
2,121
So i declined to attend my last few appts, but just for slight amusement purposes today i will attend my shrink - a - dink.

Being as I'm in the Uk, & in a region that has bloody crap MH services that can't even help the acutely unwell i fully expect to be discharged as being no longer the type of punter they help, that's fine, they are at most an illusion of help anyway & at their worst pretend punters don't exist for months on end unless you are the type to phone up & complain. I am not that type lol

So if the conversation gets anywhere near where my mood is at, which chances are it will not as why invite a conversation you have no interest in the answer to anyway. I will tell her, this is shit, i am tired of rebuilding a life only to have it come crashing back down again, the suicide attempts it causes, the struggle to rebuild another different life only for it to happen again, rinse & repeat.

The Hell is like sliding down a dark well, you never know quite how near you are to the bottom, but the light at the top gets smaller & you know that when you do hit the bottom you will attempt to die, how would anybody who has been through that multiple times want to keep doing over & over again?

But like i said i doubt the subject will come up, hey hoo.
Just don't get yourself sectioned. They'll say "how ya feelin'?"
You give the correct pre-programmed response they need to hear,
"I am fine, thank you."
Make your voice fake-cheery, they are like dogs, incapable of comprehending words, just keep your voice pleasantly toned, that's all they care about. Remember, therapists think it's not their job to help you, it is just your job to please them.
 
Letmego. Please

Letmego. Please

Wizard
Nov 18, 2018
619
Just don't get yourself sectioned. They'll say "how ya feelin'?"
You give the correct pre-programmed response they need to hear,
"I am fine, thank you."
Make your voice fake-cheery, they are like dogs, incapable of comprehending words, just keep your voice pleasantly toned, that's all they care about. Remember, therapists think it's not their job to help you, it is just your job to please them.

I'm in the Uk with a non serious (to them) diagnosis of recurrent depression. There is no need to fake anything with this lot, they either don't care or don't have the resources to care, the only thing that might get me in trouble would be if i said i will do x when i leave here, but that just gets you held in a police cell for a day till they bother to come out & assess you as good to go.

It doesn't bother me, i just feel for anyone who does really need their help, only to be turned away, that's what makes me angry about the shit state of it.

Thank you for your kind words
 
J

Jen0804

Gone
Feb 24, 2019
261
Hugs
Good luck. I know when I turn up I come away feeling much worse. Do something nice for yourself later to make up for how shit they make you feel. I dread going there so much and I agree I feel sorry for the people that go in expecting help like we did at one point

And those who have fought for a referral to be expected only to arrive and finding out there isn't much help.

Anyway good luck !! Thinking of you
 
Letmego. Please

Letmego. Please

Wizard
Nov 18, 2018
619
Thanks folks, you really are all good people.

Well it went kinda how i guessed it would or could have gone. She did at least ask about my mood & the god knows how many years training she'd had seemed to pay off in her observation that i appeared depressed. I tried to explain the whole sliding down the well analogy, think that confused her as she kept asking what was stopping me killing myself now? Tried to explain that nothing is stopping me, it will happen soon enough, i just haven't hit the bottom yet, when i do i will.
Do you have a plan? Yep. Wanna tell me? Ok (In my head as its simple & you can't threaten to take anything away) A rope.

Ok well would you like to try these new anti D's & i'll see if i can fit you in for another appt in the next month or two........

Hahaha and i just remembered, just to top off my day nicely the shrink on the way up popped me an elevator with "Pat" the Dog, you know those nice docile ones that go round hospitals giving out cuddles, well i could have done with one of those cuddles right then, the dogs reaction to me was to growl & get aggy, kinda sums up my life about now, even a dog that should have been friendly wasn't to me.

Hey hoo, time to roll another big biffta.
 
AtomicNewt

AtomicNewt

A girl doesn't need anyone who doesn't need her
Jun 5, 2019
145
I'm in the Uk with a non serious (to them) diagnosis of recurrent depression. There is no need to fake anything with this lot, they either don't care or don't have the resources to care, the only thing that might get me in trouble would be if i said i will do x when i leave here, but that just gets you held in a police cell for a day till they bother to come out & assess you as good to go.

It doesn't bother me, i just feel for anyone who does really need their help, only to be turned away, that's what makes me angry about the shit state of it.

Thank you for your kind words
Yup, in uk too and the services are shocking. Torn to shreds by an inhuman govt and no possibility of doing any healing, merely occasional firefighting, even if they felt inclined. Know someone who works with vulnerable young people and there was a 17yr old girl this year who had slashed her wrists so badly she'd passed out and needed emergency surgery to repair her arms and yet she wasn't immediately sectioned and discharged herself. When said worker phoned police concerned once they turned up they sort of shrugged and looked irritated, saying, oh her, we've had to stop her playing with traffic twice this week, in a peeved way. I mean, wtf. Such things are literally causing deaths, not to mention miserable existences for those that otherwise might be helped.

So sorry you're suffering with these incompetent morons. Big reefer and cold beer? :hug:
 
Letmego. Please

Letmego. Please

Wizard
Nov 18, 2018
619
Yup, in uk too and the services are shocking. Torn to shreds by an inhuman govt and no possibility of doing any healing, merely occasional firefighting, even if they felt inclined. Know someone who works with vulnerable young people and there was a 17yr old girl this year who had slashed her wrists so badly she'd passed out and needed emergency surgery to repair her arms and yet she wasn't immediately sectioned and discharged herself. When said worker phoned police concerned once they turned up they sort of shrugged and looked irritated, saying, oh her, we've had to stop her playing with traffic twice this week, in a peeved way. I mean, wtf. Such things are literally causing deaths, not to mention miserable existences for those that otherwise might be helped.

So sorry you're suffering with these incompetent morons. Big reefer and cold beer? :hug:

Thanks for the Hug, most appreciated.

It is depressing that nowdays the police get used so much as acute mh workers that some of them no longer care, some attitudes i get, like them being overstretched just as a police force let alone as mh as well. But others like the person you describe are sadly just tossers & that has been the same for as long as i can remember.

Back in '92 when i could still run & cause chaos i would escape their 'locked' ward at least once a week, i understood enough to know that i needed to keep outta sight & they never once caught me, but i thought nothing more of it, was just a part of the game at the time. About 10yrs later there was a court case that allowed me to read some of my notes from back then & it turned out that the staff were getting very naffed off with the police & complaining as they had started to refuse to even log me as a MISPA due to what they called the shear number of times i had wasted their recourses already....And there was me thinking i had been super smart at keeping out of their way lmao.

Apoligies for my slightly lighthearted reply, i find it easier to deal with the frustration with humour.
And yes a big reefer was enjoyed, made up for the grumpy dog yesterday.

:hug: