Has anyone you love ever ctb'ed, or intended/attempted to ctb?

[ThriveOrDie]

My uncle when I was 7. He was schizophrenic. I remember being aware that I was supposed to feel sad but I felt nothing. I think he abused me. I don't remember much of my early child hood. My brother said our uncle tried to kill him.

My boyfriend ctb 3 years ago. Still hurts a lot.

 

[ghostunderthelight]

A friend of mine killed himself when we were 15. It came as a shock to most around us, although I supposed we should have seen it coming. I, and a few other friends, would frequently talk about killing ourselves, what method we would use, where we'd go etc.
I believe he hung himself. I've considered doing the same.

 

[Zebedee]

My cousin hung himself quite recently (within the last year), he tried a few times in the past but never succeeded until his most recent and final attempt. When the news broke out, I remember feeling a bit sad but also jealous, I'm too much of a coward to end my life even though I'm miserable and lonely almost 24/7.

 

[RegretedFeeling]

My mother OD twice when I was young, my dad took me home and told me she almost died, because dealing with me was so stressful she tried to kill herself. He the. Would beat the shit out of me.

I remember cutting myself with a razor when I was five and enjoying watching the blood run out of me. I heard a noise, realized it was my dad, rather then getting in trouble I laid in my bed and bled all over my sheets and then threw them out in the morning.

 

[Why Me?]

I'm unique in that I'm the only one in my family that was ever horrifically abused enough to crave death. That spot on the bus was reserved just for me I guess. Hurrah?

I can relate.