glowing.purple.aura
Member
- Sep 15, 2025
- 90
gosh I'm too lazy and tired to type out all my thoughts about this, but...
I definitely don't have the "if I have to suffer, everyone should" mindset. I'm glad that there's someone out there that's loving their life instead of dreading it but keep them far away from me. I also know it's not healthy to just surround myself with negativity and people who are also immensely struggling but happy people make me so fucking angry and I'd much rather feel a bit better about my situation while getting worse than be pissed off and hate my situation even more regardless of if it stays the same. What makes me especially mad is when they post about it like "ehehehe life recently!!! all smiles and good company!!! :)" like yeah I'm sure you're so happy hanging out with everyone under the sun while being "too busy" to hang out the 9 million times I asked. It's also always the same people liking vent posts about being lonely while not responding to your texts because they're "protecting their peace" like no girl you're just inconsiderate and rude/annoying as fuck (definitelyyyy not thinking of a past friend while typing this out)
and it's not even like I can be like "this won't matter once I kill myself" because these happy, selfish fucks are the same ones forcing me to stay alive so that THEY don't have to feel bad...
I definitely don't have the "if I have to suffer, everyone should" mindset. I'm glad that there's someone out there that's loving their life instead of dreading it but keep them far away from me. I also know it's not healthy to just surround myself with negativity and people who are also immensely struggling but happy people make me so fucking angry and I'd much rather feel a bit better about my situation while getting worse than be pissed off and hate my situation even more regardless of if it stays the same. What makes me especially mad is when they post about it like "ehehehe life recently!!! all smiles and good company!!! :)" like yeah I'm sure you're so happy hanging out with everyone under the sun while being "too busy" to hang out the 9 million times I asked. It's also always the same people liking vent posts about being lonely while not responding to your texts because they're "protecting their peace" like no girl you're just inconsiderate and rude/annoying as fuck (definitelyyyy not thinking of a past friend while typing this out)
and it's not even like I can be like "this won't matter once I kill myself" because these happy, selfish fucks are the same ones forcing me to stay alive so that THEY don't have to feel bad...
