O
octopusinu
Member
- Sep 30, 2023
- 17
It sounds real stupid to be sad over a hobby but it was genuinely the only thing that is even remotely enjoyable to do in life anymore. I haven't had contact with friends and families for 3+ years and the only reason I still go to college anymore was to please my parents. And to top it off, work is unbearable. I worked on a project that was very personal and held very dear to me for 1+ years all on my own, all while being constantly ill(body and head aches, nosebleeds that don't stop, throwing up, very bad hallucinations of trauma that made me freeze up) only to have it snuffed out within a day of posting it to the public. I suffered through all the real life burden and loneliness simply because I just liked the hobby that much and creating stuff has become an outlet of comfort since I've been doing it since middle school.
I don't want to go into detail of what happened though I doubt anyone on this forum even knows the hobby, but I tried my best to deescalate the situation and talk to the artist but they just kept on accusing me(despite me presenting dated evidence and everything) and dismissing everything and tried to shut me off with "compensation money" when all I ask is to resolve it calmly. Their way of resolving is to make me admit to do something I never did. The truth is whoever has a bigger platform and has more "fans" is the one who wins in altercations like this so I rightfully got bullied off the hobby and deleted my platform.
I have to pretend to be civil and "fine" to online friends that were worried but the truth is I couldn't get out of bed for three days and couldn't eat and can't do anything. I burst into crying without control. I don't want to go suffer another day of school and work. I was planning on ctbing in december but I don't think I want to live past this month anymore. I didn't even want fame or engagement or fans or whatever out of the hobby the only thing I was doing for was to make myself happy. Why would they do this, and after all the drama nothing will happen to them. I'm the only one getting hurt, ill just be forgotten. i hate it so much.
I don't want to go into detail of what happened though I doubt anyone on this forum even knows the hobby, but I tried my best to deescalate the situation and talk to the artist but they just kept on accusing me(despite me presenting dated evidence and everything) and dismissing everything and tried to shut me off with "compensation money" when all I ask is to resolve it calmly. Their way of resolving is to make me admit to do something I never did. The truth is whoever has a bigger platform and has more "fans" is the one who wins in altercations like this so I rightfully got bullied off the hobby and deleted my platform.
I have to pretend to be civil and "fine" to online friends that were worried but the truth is I couldn't get out of bed for three days and couldn't eat and can't do anything. I burst into crying without control. I don't want to go suffer another day of school and work. I was planning on ctbing in december but I don't think I want to live past this month anymore. I didn't even want fame or engagement or fans or whatever out of the hobby the only thing I was doing for was to make myself happy. Why would they do this, and after all the drama nothing will happen to them. I'm the only one getting hurt, ill just be forgotten. i hate it so much.