kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
possible goodbye post ? im using 1.4 BDO. i added 30ml to some diet coke. im finding the taste really off putting. im dry heaving after each sip. its a lot worse than my test dose (i used 10ml last time) if im not active after a few days please feel free to put a line through my name. this is what i want but its a lot harder than i thought it would be. all i have to do is finish this glass
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,508
I wish you all the best. May you find peace. Safe travels and good luck!
 
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Dliena

Dliena

𝚂𝚂 𝙼𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝙽𝚘. 43,53?
Dec 22, 2023
1,889
Peace eternal and forever OP, good of luck to you.
 
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iloverachel

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2024
1,199
Good bye my friend and may you find pece
You will be missed
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
thank you everyone 🩷🩷 i will try to keep updating
im so stressed and i have only taken a few sips. my heart rate is in the 130s and i took a beta blocker before hand. im scared
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
Wish you all the best. Am going to miss seeing you around. Hope this ends peaceful and smooth for you. Hope you find your ethernal peace ❤️
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
im almost half way through. i feel so pathetic all i have to do is drink but its taking me minutes in-between each sip
im starting to fee nauseous. i haven't had that much yet so i think its just me getting myself worked up and maybe the taste. i don't have an antiemetic so im going to be really pissed if i end up vomiting
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
im almost half way through. i feel so pathetic all i have to do is drink but its taking me minutes in-between each sip
im starting to fee nauseous. i haven't had that much yet so i think its just me getting myself worked up and maybe the taste. i don't have an antiemetic so im going to be really pissed if i end up vomiting
Am so sorry you are finding it hard, sending all the positive energy your way, am staying here with you 🫂
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
Am so sorry you are finding it hard, sending all the positive energy your way, am staying here with you 🫂
thank you so much 🩷 its comforting to know im not alone
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
You have any thing to distract yourself with and not think about it?
im listening to some of my favourite songs right now. its not really helping so i think i might try and watch some tv
 
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davidtorez

davidtorez

Mage
Mar 8, 2024
543
I hope you get the peace and rest that you deserve ❤️
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
im listening to some of my favourite songs right now. its not really helping so i think i might try and watch some tv
Anything to take your mind off of it. The more distracted you can be the better ❤️❤️
 
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PetrichorBirth

PetrichorBirth

Student
Mar 5, 2024
163
possible goodbye post ? im using 1.4 BDO. i added 30ml to some diet coke. im finding the taste really off putting. im dry heaving after each sip. its a lot worse than my test dose (i used 10ml last time) if im not active after a few days please feel free to put a line through my name. this is what i want but its a lot harder than i thought it would be. all i have to do is finish this glass
Wishing you all the best. Maybe consider some Animal crossing music, for calmness. Helps me atleast. How are you right now?
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
I don't know much about this method @kittyswift does it take too long? Are you in pain?
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
Wishing you all the best. Maybe consider some Animal crossing music, for calmness. Helps me atleast. How are you right now?
im really stressed. i am certain this is what i want but i think SI is getting in the way. all i have to do is drink but it feels like the hardest thing i have ever had to do
I don't know much about this method, does it take too long? Are you in pain?
it can take a few hours. its a CNS depressant and doesn't cause any pain


ive been on this thread for almost half an hour and im still just over half way through the drink. is this as pathetic as it feels?
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,508
How r u doing now? We're here for you! You're not alone :heart:
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
its a CNS depressant and doesn't cause any pain
Am glad to hear you are atleast not in too much pain. No one deserves to go out in pain.
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
im not in any pain or discomfort im just stressed. i wish i took the time to source some benzos.. i just need to power through i think. thank you for all the replies and for staying with me. it means more than you know
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,877
Farewell, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
im just stressed
Totally understandable! It's not an easy thing to do. It could help to try and remember why you are doing this. Hope it gets you your peace ❤️
 
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PetrichorBirth

PetrichorBirth

Student
Mar 5, 2024
163
im not in any pain or discomfort im just stressed. i wish i took the time to source some benzos.. i just need to power through i think. thank you for all the replies and for staying with me. it means more than you know
We'll stay with you
possible goodbye post ? im using 1.4 BDO. i added 30ml to some diet coke. im finding the taste really off putting. im dry heaving after each sip. its a lot worse than my test dose (i used 10ml last time) if im not active after a few days please feel free to put a line through my name. this is what i want but its a lot harder than i thought it would be. all i have to do is finish this glass
What happened during your test dose?
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
this feels so surreal. im stressed but all this support is making me feel sad but in a good way! i wish i felt this cared for earlier in my life. i love this community. im so grateful
We'll stay with you

What happened during your test dose?
during my teat dose i was in and out of consciousness, went into respiratory depression and had a seizure. my lips and fingers were blue. i wasn't in any pain it just felt like i was drunk and drugged up. i dont remember much of it
half way through. im trying now to take two sips at a time. the taste is so bad. im trying to hurry up but also take my time so i dont panic and vomit
time is going by so quickly. im beginning to feel the effects
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
ive been on this thread for almost half an hour and im still just over half way through the drink. is this as pathetic as it feels?
NO! It's definitely not pathetic! Be easy on yourself. Also know that it's ok if you want to call for help. We are all here for you whatever you decide kind soul ❤️
during my teat dose i was in and out of consciousness, went into respiratory depression and had a seizure. my lips and fingers were blue. i wasn't in any pain it just felt like i was drunk and drugged up. i dont remember much of it
The symptoms of this method seem very promising
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
NO! It's definitely not pathetic! Be easy on yourself. Also know that it's ok if you want to call for help. We are all here for you whatever you decide kind soul ❤️
thank you so much for the kind words. i don't think i have ever felt this cared for before.
 
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S

SVEN

Enlightened
Apr 3, 2023
1,780
im really stressed. i am certain this is what i want but i think SI is getting in the way. all i have to do is drink but it feels like the hardest thing i have ever had to do

it can take a few hours. its a CNS depressant and doesn't cause any pain


ive been on this thread for almost half an hour and im still just over half way through the drink. is this as pathetic as it feels?

Absolutely not pathetic at all, Kitty. Every good wish unmet friend.
 
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PetrichorBirth

PetrichorBirth

Student
Mar 5, 2024
163
this feels so surreal. im stressed but all this support is making me feel sad but in a good way! i wish i felt this cared for earlier in my life. i love this community. im so grateful

during my teat dose i was in and out of consciousness, went into respiratory depression and had a seizure. my lips and fingers were blue. i wasn't in any pain it just felt like i was drunk and drugged up. i dont remember much of it
half way through. im trying now to take two sips at a time. the taste is so bad. im trying to hurry up but also take my time so i dont panic and vomit
time is going by so quickly. im beginning to feel the effects
You decided to go down this path, i hope it will be a good one for you. Eternity will care for you, and who knows, maybe people do meet again in some ways.
 
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kittyswift

kittyswift

getting tired even for a phoenix..
Sep 29, 2023
216
i feel really drunk and nauseous. but i am not in any pain. im trying really hard not to throw up. survival instinct is a bitch
 
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rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,788
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,508
I hope all goes well for you. :heart:
 
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