GOODBYE THREAD

[venin.n]

I'm sorry. It is very hard to ctb because of SI and I'm sorry you failed. Please take some time to recompose yourself before you attempt again. I wish you the best.t

Thank you… I will

How are you now? Are you gonna attempt again?

Welcome back! Living is hard and dying is even harder. I feel the pain. I hope you can get over it quickly. May I ask you what method u wanted to use?

Fuck me that's true. I'll tell you but i have to breathe a couple of days because now I feel just horrible.

I need a lot of support rn

 

[SuccubsHeart]

I can't do it…

Fuck life

Fuck everything….

I am sorry. SI sucks :(
I added you on discord. If you ever want to talk, just call or text me (bloody knife pic profile).
Please, don't be too harsh on yourself, ctb is really hard to do

 

[アホペンギン]

Thank you… I will

Please rest as much as you can. I hope you can feel better afterwards.

If you don't mind.. which method do you plan to use?

How are you now? Are you gonna attempt again?

I currently have no plans to attempt right now since I have no good means of doing so and I am feeling quite tired and weak right now because of not eating enough. Despite having no plans, I may attempt soon anyways but that'd be an impulsive attempt since I'm prone to doing such things. A lot of my attempts have actually been impulsive, but all of those attempts failed miserably.

 

[venin.n]

Please rest as much as you can. I hope you can feel better afterwards.

If you don't mind.. which method do you plan to use?

I currently have no plans to attempt right now since I have no good means of doing so and I am feeling quite tired and weak right now because of not eating enough. Despite having no plans, I may attempt soon anyways but that'd be an impulsive attempt since I'm prone to doing such things. A lot of my attempts have actually been impulsive, but all of those attempts failed miserably.

I'm gonna talk about what happened but in a few days. I can't right now

 

[アホペンギン]

I'm gonna talk about what happened but in a few days. I can't right now

That's fine, take your time to ensure that you feel better and make sure you have a clear mind until you do anything. Don't remind yourself of what happened too much and relax.

 

[venin.n]

That's fine, take your time to ensure that you feel better and make sure you have a clear mind until you do anything. Don't remind yourself of what happened too much and relax.

I will. I feel very exhausted and a failure…

I wish we had an off button. That would be so nice..

Thank you for the advice

I am sorry. SI sucks :(
I added you on discord. If you ever want to talk, just call or text me (bloody knife pic profile).
Please, don't be too harsh on yourself, ctb is really hard to do

Yes. Fucking SI……..

Thanks a bunch

I'm scared of everything right now.

I didn't expect to not be able to do it

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

 

[CloudyNightSky]

I didn't expect to not be able to do it

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Feel that so much. But actually I just can repeat the others. Take your time and don't be too disappointed in yourself. I mean you have a lot of time. Sending you a lot of hugs so you can be maybe kindaaa ok rn :)

 

[venin.n]

Feel that so much. But actually I just can repeat the others. Take your time and don't be too disappointed in yourself. I mean you have a lot of time. Sending you a lot of hugs so you can be maybe kindaaa ok rn :)

Hard with the dissapointment part. It's crushing me

Thank you

 

[Deleted member 65988]

@venin.n please don't beat yourself up. Si is rather difficult to overcome, I know you feel disappointed but trust me, it's OK how you are feeling rn.

 

[venin.n]

@venin.n please don't beat yourself up. Si is rather difficult to overcome, I know you feel disappointed but trust me, it's OK how you are feeling rn.

Ty

 

[アホペンギン]

Hard with the dissapointment part. It's crushing me

SI is a normal aspect of our bodies and life, it is nothing to be ashamed of for failing ctb because of it. Take some rest, try not to think about the failure and calm down and decide what you want to do again with a clear mind.

 

[venin.n]

SI is a normal aspect of our bodies and life, it is nothing to be ashamed of for failing ctb because of it. Take some rest, try not to think about the failure and calm down and decide what you want to do again with a clear mind.

 

[absolutelyyou]

Venin my heart breaks for this pain you are going through. There's always the conflict that I feel- sorrow for you not being able to get the peace and freedom you deserve to be able to experience, but also a small bit of light for knowing the world hasn't lost someone who really feels like a point of light no matter how dark you might feel. I'm so sorry SI has trapped you here for now and that it's only made your pain worse. If you ever want to chat or vent or just make a new friend who understands and wont run away from talking about life being dark we're linked up on discord now, my name starts with "Exhaustingly" and then my real first name which you're welcome to call me on discord.

 

[lonelysadman89]

Well it's been months since I left SS and nothing got better no matter how much I tried. I cannot and will not accept life as it is anymore.

I am empty, numbed by the meds, single, unemployed, no close friends, depression ruined my career and those above frankly.
So no, I will not continue. I have had enough.

I know that life can be pretty fucking amazing but that for me is history.
It just destroys me, every second, to see "normal" people making progress in their life, in every field, being loved, loving, having a purpose…. Fuuuuuuk me man…it's too much…

My chances of getting well from my diseases are microscopic and getting the life I want is practicly impossible, so…

My heart aches immensly and I hate that I have reached this point in my life but I would be tormenting myself by continuing.

I've led a decent life, had a lot of fun, loved, fucked, travelled, written, read and so on..

I hope you get it better and still have chances to get the life you're dreaming of.

Love, peace and compassion

Ty SS and SS members for being such an amazing safe and compassionate place. I love you all

I will probably ctb in 2 3 days

I sincerely hope the best for you.

Your words really made an impact on me since I feel the exact same way, but the difference is that I think I have some small possibilities to have a great future? However, I'm very tired of life and I don't know how "normal" people enjoy their activities a lot, how they can study, work or do both things, sleep well, eating well, working out, having a schedule... basically a healthy life. It's just impossible for me because whenever I try to do something good, something else goes bad and not to mention that I basically hate everything that I used to love last year, that I lost my mother last year, who was the only person I was close with.

In some way sometimes I think I have more possibilities to not CTB compared to others and it makes me feel very bad because I'm not exactly socioeconomically poor, yet my life is truly shit when it comes to my mind. I can't control my emotions and I suffer from severe major chronic depression since I was born (diagnozed by 3 different psychiatrists)... Sometimes I also feel I'm fucking retarded and that's why I can't do anything, yet people consider me quite above average, but I know that I don't know anything... I also recently noticed that I'm autistic and it helped me to understand a lot of things in my life, but that doesn't mean that I want to keep living.

As I said, I don't know why life is so exhausting, everything is so difficult and I just want to disappear, sleep forever or just die without any pain. This is very boring in every aspect of my life. I don't know what to do.. If someone reads my reply, do you have any suggestion or idea? I don't think anyone will read this, but whenever I die I hope that this comment remains here. I've tried to CTB 3 times in my life with medicines but it didn't work because I vomited the meds... Now I have a little more knowledge of what to do and I'm absolutely thinking in doing it again, I don't know when, but each day is harder to live. I HATE LIFE and I'm jealous of how people enjoy their lives so easy and happily!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, back to the topic. I hope you rest in peace and whoever wants to CTB soon, I also hope the best for you... If your suicide attempt fails (maybe) it's coincidence and you need to wait more time until you understand what to do correctly or maybe your thoughts will change? Nobody knows what's going to happen, but if you succeed, I'll be happy to know that you read my message and at least felt that you had someone that was thinking of you ending your life (I mean, I literally don't imagine the situation, but for example if I was about to hang, probably my last seconds breathing would be remembering the few people that thought of me recently)

Good luck to everyone.

Farewell, friend. I feel the same as you. I'm leaving Sunday, so I am definitely on the same wavelength as you. I agree with you that if I can't have the life I want, then life isn't worth living. It's shitty to stay in an existence where life does nothing but show you everyone else winning while it shits on you.

If you're seriously going through with it, I bid you farewell and wish for you peace and a beautiful slumber if not a truly better life for YOU.

Rest in peace, my dear leavingsoon99, and if not... Here you can talk with me if you need anything because I feel that I'm about to do the same in a few days maybe... Good luck.

 

[venin.n]

I sincerely hope the best for you.

Your words really made an impact on me since I feel the exact same way, but the difference is that I think I have some small possibilities to have a great future? However, I'm very tired of life and I don't know how "normal" people enjoy their activities a lot, how they can study, work or do both things, sleep well, eating well, working out, having a schedule... basically a healthy life. It's just impossible for me because whenever I try to do something good, something else goes bad and not to mention that I basically hate everything that I used to love last year, that I lost my mother last year, who was the only person I was close with.

In some way sometimes I think I have more possibilities to not CTB compared to others and it makes me feel very bad because I'm not exactly socioeconomically poor, yet my life is truly shit when it comes to my mind. I can't control my emotions and I suffer from severe major chronic depression since I was born (diagnozed by 3 different psychiatrists)... Sometimes I also feel I'm fucking retarded and that's why I can't do anything, yet people consider me quite above average, but I know that I don't know anything... I also recently noticed that I'm autistic and it helped me to understand a lot of things in my life, but that doesn't mean that I want to keep living.

As I said, I don't know why life is so exhausting, everything is so difficult and I just want to disappear, sleep forever or just die without any pain. This is very boring in every aspect of my life. I don't know what to do.. If someone reads my reply, do you have any suggestion or idea? I don't think anyone will read this, but whenever I die I hope that this comment remains here. I've tried to CTB 3 times in my life with medicines but it didn't work because I vomited the meds... Now I have a little more knowledge of what to do and I'm absolutely thinking in doing it again, I don't know when, but each day is harder to live. I HATE LIFE and I'm jealous of how people enjoy their lives so easy and happily!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, back to the topic. I hope you rest in peace and whoever wants to CTB soon, I also hope the best for you... If your suicide attempt fails (maybe) it's coincidence and you need to wait more time until you understand what to do correctly or maybe your thoughts will change? Nobody knows what's going to happen, but if you succeed, I'll be happy to know that you read my message and at least felt that you had someone that was thinking of you ending your life (I mean, I literally don't imagine the situation, but for example if I was about to hang, probably my last seconds breathing would be remembering the few people that thought of me recently)

Good luck to everyone.

Rest in peace, my dear leavingsoon99, and if not... Here you can talk with me if you need anything because I feel that I'm about to do the same in a few days maybe... Good luck.

Thank you for your message.
I couldn't do it… I wasn't in the right state of mind.
I'm sorry to hear you're so sick of life, depressed and tired. I can relate to it 1000%.

Maybe we can talk until I figure out wtf I'm gonna do.

Take care

P.S. my answer would've been more elaborate but I'm feeling really down rn.

 

[lonelysadman89]

Thank you for your message.
I couldn't do it… I wasn't in the right state of mind.
I'm sorry to hear you're so sick of life, depressed and tired. I can relate to it 1000%.

Maybe we can talk until I figure out wtf I'm gonna do.

Take care

P.S. my answer would've been more elaborate but I'm feeling really down rn.

Don't worry... I completely relate to your last sentence... Sometimes I don't even have the energy to THINK or just write something in my computer. Even though I don't know you I hope that you take the best decision for you to rest in peace. I think during this month I'll try to CTB but idk if I'm gonna be successful because I've already failed 3 times. I'm probably trying an overdose with just a lot of different medicines but idk how it's going... Not to mention that I have some clonazepam and maybe I can mix it with some alcohol and much more medicines... Good luck. Maybe I'm trying it tonight

 

[venin.n]

I made this Discord thread for chit-chat, vent, idk

If you wanna join, you're all welcome

Discord
I hope it wro

Don't worry... I completely relate to your last sentence... Sometimes I don't even have the energy to THINK or just write something in my computer. Even though I don't know you I hope that you take the best decision for you to rest in peace. I think during this month I'll try to CTB but idk if I'm gonna be successful because I've already failed 3 times. I'm probably trying an overdose with just a lot of different medicines but idk how it's going... Not to mention that I have some clonazepam and maybe I can mix it with some alcohol and much more medicines... Good luck. Maybe I'm trying it tonigh

I hope this works… research a lot before doing the combo

Keep me posted if you do

 

[venin.n]

I think I'm gonna go next week, so if anybody wants to join the discord server and talk, please do. You've all helped me so much and I am eternally grateful

 

[girlsboysthems]

Well it's been months since I left SS and nothing got better no matter how much I tried. I cannot and will not accept life as it is anymore.

I am empty, numbed by the meds, single, unemployed, no close friends, depression ruined my career and those above frankly.
So no, I will not continue. I have had enough.

I know that life can be pretty fucking amazing but that for me is history.
It just destroys me, every second, to see "normal" people making progress in their life, in every field, being loved, loving, having a purpose…. Fuuuuuuk me man…it's too much…

My chances of getting well from my diseases are microscopic and getting the life I want is practicly impossible, so…

My heart aches immensly and I hate that I have reached this point in my life but I would be tormenting myself by continuing.

I've led a decent life, had a lot of fun, loved, fucked, travelled, written, read and so on..

I hope you get it better and still have chances to get the life you're dreaming of.

Love, peace and compassion

Ty SS and SS members for being such an amazing safe and compassionate place. I love you all

I will probably ctb in 2 3 days

love you man, see you on the otherside

 

[venin.n]

love you man, see you on the otherside

you too

 

[Vesiira]

Well it's been months since I left SS and nothing got better no matter how much I tried. I cannot and will not accept life as it is anymore.

I am empty, numbed by the meds, single, unemployed, no close friends, depression ruined my career and those above frankly.
So no, I will not continue. I have had enough.

I know that life can be pretty fucking amazing but that for me is history.
It just destroys me, every second, to see "normal" people making progress in their life, in every field, being loved, loving, having a purpose…. Fuuuuuuk me man…it's too much…

My chances of getting well from my diseases are microscopic and getting the life I want is practicly impossible, so…

My heart aches immensly and I hate that I have reached this point in my life but I would be tormenting myself by continuing.

I've led a decent life, had a lot of fun, loved, fucked, travelled, written, read and so on..

I hope you get it better and still have chances to get the life you're dreaming of.

Love, peace and compassion

Ty SS and SS members for being such an amazing safe and compassionate place. I love you all

I will probably ctb in 2 3 days

I'm so sorry to hear this, but I completely understand. I'm glad you lived in the span you have, even if it won't be much longer. At least you had those experiences and got to have some good moments. However, even all the good memories can't override the hurt and pain that we feel. There's so much of it and we just want peace. I don't blame you for doing what you can to find yours. Sending love.

 

[Raindancer]

It hurts me that so many of us suffer to such a degree. It's so deep and soul wrenching and sucks every bit of life and energy from us. Venin.n I am happy you are still here, for now. I hate that life brings us to the precipice and we have to say goodbye. Be kind to yourself and I wish you peace and love.

 

[venin.n]

I'm so sorry to hear this, but I completely understand. I'm glad you lived in the span you have, even if it won't be much longer. At least you had those experiences and got to have some good moments. However, even all the good memories can't override the hurt and pain that we feel. There's so much of it and we just want peace. I don't blame you for doing what you can to find yours. Sending love.

Love back

It hurts me that so many of us suffer to such a degree. It's so deep and soul wrenching and sucks every bit of life and energy from us. Venin.n I am happy you are still here, for now. I hate that life brings us to the precipice and we have to say goodbye. Be kind to yourself and I wish you peace and love.

You too my friend thank you for your message

 

[Quantum Particle]

Good to see you back and hope you haven't ctb for a reason maybe unknown yet. Keep plugging away at this shit life buddy and I sincerely hope after this things look brighter for you. You deserve it

 

[almondmilk]

Well it's been months since I left SS and nothing got better no matter how much I tried. I cannot and will not accept life as it is anymore.

I am empty, numbed by the meds, single, unemployed, no close friends, depression ruined my career and those above frankly.
So no, I will not continue. I have had enough.

I know that life can be pretty fucking amazing but that for me is history.
It just destroys me, every second, to see "normal" people making progress in their life, in every field, being loved, loving, having a purpose…. Fuuuuuuk me man…it's too much…

My chances of getting well from my diseases are microscopic and getting the life I want is practicly impossible, so…

My heart aches immensly and I hate that I have reached this point in my life but I would be tormenting myself by continuing.

I've led a decent life, had a lot of fun, loved, fucked, travelled, written, read and so on..

I hope you get it better and still have chances to get the life you're dreaming of.

Love, peace and compassion

Ty SS and SS members for being such an amazing safe and compassionate place. I love you all

I will probably ctb in 2 3 days

hey!!! imi pare rau sa aud toate astea =((( sunt intr o situatie similara , fara prieteni , fara relatie (fara conexiuni umane overall) , n am job , si multe probleme mentale. nu esti singur aici , daca vrei poti oricand sa mi dai dm =(((