Goodbye (for real)

[IHurtTheOneILove]

Hey everyone! I'm at my hotel rn and check out is in an hour which feels like I have an impending death clock lol. I'm gonna shoot myself in the next coming hour with a .45 ACP pistol with an FMJ round (unfortunately not ideal bullet)

I'm unable to acquire any other ammo because of my stay in a psych ward which'll show on my background check.

I've written my letters and I've recorded a final video which I'm going to send to my friends explaining that I'm dead. I'm thinking about reaching out to my ex to ask if they have any questions that'll help with closure but to be honest I feel like they won't care. It's already been 4 months lol

Thank you guys for always being so understanding and welcoming. See ya when I see ya <3

 

[Helvete]

Love you bro, i hope you can find peace! you are an incredible human being <3

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

you don't need a background check for ammunition purchases. I'll see you soon.

 

[Helvete]

Just be very aware that fmj goes right through you and can tend to do minimal damage. Surprisingly easy to survive, and i actually have two relatives that have experienced that first hand

 

[rozeske]

I don't know about gun suicides but you don't seem prepared from the type of ammo to the only 1hr to check out....you never wanna mess up a gun attempt.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

Just be very aware that fmj goes right through you and can tend to do minimal damage. Surprisingly easy to survive, and i actually have two relatives that have experienced that first hand

back of throat angled 15 degrees upward, the isostatic alone from a 45 acp will liquefy the brainstem. it's enough, more than enough.

 

[Helvete]

Agreed, FMJ has lead to a VERY VERY large amount of failed attempts

 

[justcallmeJ]

Must of been a weird couple last days reading your last posts. If this is definitely it, goodbye, and i really hope you find the peace you need. And please shoot correctly! You dont want to make this a trip to the hospital with severe damage :(
I wish you the best whatever happens <3

 

[tbroken]

you don't need a background check for ammunition purchases. I'll see you soon.

Just be very aware that fmj goes right through you and can tend to do minimal damage. Surprisingly easy to survive, and i actually have two relatives that have experienced that first hand

I hope you find peace man, but please read the advices above. Be extremely careful or try another day, with better gadgets...

 

[letsgetittogo]

How are you feeling? Ready and calm, or more on the angsty side?

What will you say in your goodbye video?

Best of luck brother, praying that everything goes according to plan for you

 

[underscore_nine]

May God be with you

 

[billie]

I hope you find the peace you are looking for

 

[LifeIsCrazyNemb]

Good luck my friend and take care!

 

[IHurtTheOneILove]

you don't need a background check for ammunition purchases. I'll see you soon.

Unfortunately you do, I went to buy hollowpoint on the way to my CTB destination and they required my ID + passport for a background check.

Unfortunately you do, I went to buy hollowpoint on the way to my CTB destination and they required my ID + passport for a background check.

Actually it mightve been bcus I went to buy ammo before crossing state lines I'm gonna try my luck at another store and probably just do it off the side of the road?

 

[Helvete]

It might just be the state your are in's laws.
Wish i could just give you a big hug man, nothing is ever easy
Wish i could just give you a big hug man, nothing is ever easy

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

I hope you find peace man, but please read the advices above. Be extremely careful or try another day, with better gadgets...

Just be very aware that fmj goes right through you and can tend to do minimal damage. Surprisingly easy to survive, and i actually have two relatives that have experienced that first hand

Unfortunately you do, I went to buy hollowpoint on the way to my CTB destination and they required my ID + passport for a background check.

sorry friend, I didn't know that. it doesn't work like that here. must be a state by state issue, and that's bullshit.

but, . 45 round nose will get the job done, brainstem, back of throat angle it up, the concussive and isostatic shock will be enough at that impact range. I'm using the same method for myself. extensive firearms experience and training in my history fwiw. there will always be random cases of where it didn't work, those can put people off even if they are in the extremeist of minority cases. anything .380 .45, 38 10mm 9mm, all workable.
you don;t have to do it though, at all..

good luck, peace and i'll be joining soon.

 

[Demian]

I wish you all the best!

Not to be pro-life, but if you're not 100 per cent, don't do it. You already have the method and, if you want it with total certainty, you have control of your death in your hands.

There's no need to rush.

But whatever your decision, I wish you the best!

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

I wish you the best of luck,, I hope you can finally be eased of your pain,, but please remember to do what you want and not what you might think you need to do, we never talked but I've read most of your posts, thank you for your time and again I wish you the best.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

Unfortunately you do, I went to buy hollowpoint on the way to my CTB destination and they required my ID + passport for a background check.

Actually it mightve been bcus I went to buy ammo before crossing state lines I'm gonna try my luck at another store and probably just do it off the side of the road?

sounds like you aren't ready tbh, that's okay, okay? what you have will work, but only if you are ready.

 

[IHurtTheOneILove]

sorry friend, I didn't know that. it doesn't work like that here. must be a state by state issue, and that's bullshit.

but, . 45 round nose will get the job done, brainstem, back of throat angle it up, the concussive and isostatic shock will be enough at that impact range. I'm using the same method for myself. extensive firearms experience and training in my history fwiw. there will always be random cases of where it didn't work, those can put people off even if they are in the extremeist of minority cases. anything .380 .45, 38 10mm 9mm, all workable.
you don;t have to do it though, at all..

good luck, peace and i'll be joining soon.

It was state by state. Just went to a ammo store and got RIP rounds with no issue. RIP will for sure kill me instantly. They're so effective that they got banned in war lol

It was state by state. Just went to a ammo store and got RIP rounds with no issue. RIP will for sure kill me instantly. They're so effective that they got banned in war lol

Shit maybe might swap them out for hollowpoint lol im not sure

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

It was state by state. Just went to a ammo store and got RIP rounds with no issue. RIP will for sure kill me instantly. They're so effective that they got banned in war lol

Shit maybe might swap them out for hollowpoint lol im not sure

i'm not sure what you mean about swapping them out for hollow points, idk that you can return ammo for trade? but that might be a state issue too. you sound like your plans are off, at least for now. bought yourself some time too with those RIPs.
good luck

 

[Helvete]

Im really not trying to be that guy, but you sound hesitant, and If you need to wait thats fine. There is genuinely no rush, and the gun isnt going anywhere fast. I got mine sitting with me here too so i get it.

 

[evannave]

You still here? Wishing you the best of luck <3 See you eventually :3

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

Im really not trying to be that guy, but you sound hesitant, and If you need to wait thats fine. There is genuinely no rush, and the gun isnt going anywhere fast. I got mine sitting with me here too so i get it

You are not that guy, it just is what it is and yes, it's not a solid sounding plan. Hopefully they don't have to go through with and if they do hopefully they have better tools now.

 

[IHurtTheOneILove]

Im really not trying to be that guy, but you sound hesitant, and If you need to wait thats fine. There is genuinely no rush, and the gun isnt going anywhere fast. I got mine sitting with me here too so i get it.

You still here? Wishing you the best of luck <3 See you eventually :3

You are not that guy, it just is what it is and yes, it's not a solid sounding plan. Hopefully they don't have to go through with and if they do hopefully they have better tools now.

Just went back to the ammo place and exchanged for hollowpoints. I thought I was ready but going thru with everything is proving difficult. Idk it's like I need to prove that I'm legitimately suicidal by doing it but I'm just worrier abt what happens with notes and shit afterwards

 

[FuneralCry]

Farewell and best wishes, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.

 

[IHurtTheOneILove]

Also currently checked out of hotel room so it's looking like I check into a cheap motel nearby or pull off to the side of the road

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

Just went back to the ammo place and exchanged for hollowpoints. I thought I was ready but going thru with everything is proving difficult. Idk it's like I need to prove that I'm legitimately suicidal by doing it but I'm just worrier abt what happens with notes and shit afterwards

You don't have anything to prove, it's a relief if you don't go through with it, although I don't know if saying that goes against the idea of the board in being a rare place that supports people with their exit plans, either way everybody understands and I'm sure probably want you to either be able to carry things out in the safest way, or things not have to go that way at all.

 

[Helvete]

If youre actually ready, why dont you treat yourself yknow? Buy a fancy dinner for yourself and enjoy it bro

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

Also currently checked out of hotel room so it's looking like I check into a cheap motel nearby or pull off to the side of the road

Are there any rural locations around? Somewhere where you can be alone? on the side of the road sounds dangerous, first of all people be able to see you and maybe try to get involved? Whatever you decide to do is your choice but it would be awful if somebody interfered and you got put into an involuntary situation.