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noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
6,849
Today I visited my friends. And it was really good they mean the world to me. My aunt wants to force me to spend time with her and my family. Today I had the courage to send her a reply to a message where she demands from me to visit her, my sister and dad next week. I think I was brave. And I won't agree to a meeting. She is just pissed because I hate her and don't want to have contact with her. I don't know this woman. She isn't in the position to demand things from me. Where was she my whole life? She now realizes she is all alone and sees her family as the last way to find community. I just despise her personality though. I find it really uncomfortable to spend time with her.

So I just was ghosted from such an interesting neurodiverse woman and friend of me told maybe I should send her one last message. But I don't know this feels humiliating. She probably moved on. I was so fucking hurt. And texted a woman that obviously is manipulative and wants to take advantage of my conditions. It was just a rollercoaster. It is in some way stressful the journey to my friends. But today was really good for my emotional state. They still doubt my perception on some issues. I had psychosis. But this was a side note. The topic was only brought up by me at the end and my friends lose the overview of all the women I had contact with. Nothing really lasted long though and it fucking hurts like hell.

We played Mario Party Jamboree and it was so fucking funny. I cried tears because we were laughing so hard. I like that my friends don't define them over sex or brag with women. We are always supportive and we call each other out if there is something said which could be perceived as toxic by anyone of us. I love it to have fun with my friends. I really love them. I think without them I would be already dead. We have so many inside joke. One joke of me. I repeated the name Mojtaba very often and said it in a way that it sounds similar to a Pokemon name.

Thank you for listening to me. I am on my way home. I think I still need time to recover. I am scared of a mixed manic depressive episode. I have strong mood swings. I should take more emergency medication. This is a good conclusion. I think reflecting on the day really helped me to realize that. I think this is good.
 
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noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
6,849
There is an inside joke I am doing with my friends in Mario Party. The game usually goes at first there are trials of mini games. Like training sessions before it becomes serious. And my common behavior is I am not serious when I am in the stronger position before we play the mini games so that my friends cannot win against me when it becomes serious. This has become a running gag. There was one mini game where it was 3 versus 1. And in the training session the 3 friends in one team allied to kill themselves as fast as possible to give the other friend no time for real training. It became really funny because it was like a competition of who loses first. Obviously this was all a joke. The team of 3 actually lost because without real training we were not prepared either.
 

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