Venting Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck..... CTB Date Will Be The 26th Now FML

[darksoul999]

Last night my Dad told me he want's to leave early (Tomorrow) and go visit my grandparents. Just out of nowhere...

Why life?

Why can't my plans go fucking smoothly for once?

I had my room booked for tomorrow night. Lucky, i called them and i got a refund.

At least i got that.

But fuck man, what does a guy have to do to die?

I can't tell him no because it will look super sus.

I don't want him to think i am planning anything.

He knows i have suicidal thoughts, for the most part i have been looking happy on the outside.

Playing it smooth....

it's Looking like i will have to live another week on this shit planet.

9-26-26 is the date now...

I could just do it today, but i still have some heart left & don't want them to find me.

also, today is the day i am suppose to clean my car, print my letters and finish everything...

Fuck.

 

[balladeer]

That is a very big sign from the universe perhaps... and hey atleast 26-26 has a more pleasant tone to it don't u think?

 

[ctb_warrior]

That is a very big sign from the universe perhaps... and hey atleast 26-26 has a more pleasant tone to it don't u think?

I really admire how you look at things so much positively. I agree, it's a sign from the universe that it's still not time to ctb. Universe communicates through such events.

Last night my Dad told me he want's to leave early (Tomorrow) and go visit my grandparents. Just out of nowhere...

Why life?

Why can't my plans go fucking smoothly for once?

I had my room booked for tomorrow night. Lucky, i called them and i got a refund.

At least i got that.

But fuck man, what does a guy have to do to die?

I can't tell him no because it will look super sus.

I don't want him to think i am planning anything.

He knows i have suicidal thoughts, for the most part i have been looking happy on the outside.

Playing it smooth....

it's Looking like i will have to live another week on this shit planet.

9-26-26 is the date now...

I could just do it today, but i still have some heart left & don't want them to find me.

also, today is the day i am suppose to clean my car, print my letters and finish everything...

Fuck.

I too have been playing it smooth at home. Plus i cleared an important interview..so they are gaining confidence that i have become better.
Though as i have grown up and understand how their mind works, I'm able to shield my thoughts from them.
Don't worry, may be life wants you to enjoy some more time before you go. And when you can ctb any time now, live and enjoy sometime that is left in this lifetime
Ever since i got my sn, i have suddenly flipped.
I ordered my favourite chocolates that i didn't want to eat earlier. I order my favourite food everyday. I'm buying the gadgets i wanted to have. Show middle finger to life and say FU
And enjoy till you ctb

 

[darksoul999]

That is a very big sign from the universe perhaps... and hey atleast 26-26 has a more pleasant tone to it don't u think?

that is true, and i am 26. 9-26-26. dead at 26

 

[balladeer]

I really admire how you look at things so much positively. I agree, it's a sign from the universe that it's still not time to ctb. Universe communicates through such events.

If you say so, I would say it's quite the opposite I am very miserable and pessimistic irl haha. Or maybe I'm in a good mood my sn arrived about 20mins ago and guess what? Believe me I am not making this up when I say before that I was just reading the thread you made when you got yours!