camiii<3

camiii<3

New Member
Dec 3, 2023
1
Hii this is my first post here i decided to join because i realized none of my friends give a fuck about me lolll. My boyfriend broke up with me 1 week ago and i genuinely cant fucking take it anymore!! he left me in the dumps of my fucking mental health cause he decided it was too much for him. He said he fell out of love because of all the fights we've been in like it's not his fucking fault he never tried to fix them he only over relied on me to fix every single thing in the relationship like i'm fucking sorry i didnt do enough while you sat on your ass doing nothing and now he's talking to this new girl after he said he's "staying away from relationships for awhile" let's be fucking honest with ourselves right now you are literally in love with her that's why you left me. I actually cant watch him do all the things i begged him to do our ENTIRE relationship for another girl A WEEK AFTER WE BROKE UP TO A GIRL HES NOT EVEN DATING???? i actually feel like shit. and in the middle of our relationship he told me he was in love with his ex and i'm fucking idiot and i stayed with him and HE NEVER EVER gave me reassurance that he didn't love her anymore and expected me to be OKAY???? I HATE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH I CANT FUCKING DO THIS I JUST WANT TO DIE. He told me he wants me to get better but ghosts me doesn't give a fuck about me and tells me he doesn't want to hear about my problems not only that he fucking asked for the shit i bought him for our 1 year anniversary that i bought him while he WASNT IN LOVE WITH ME i asked him why he let me waste my money and he told me didn't KNOW HOW TO FUCKING TELL ME ARE YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING SERIOUS. not only that we had sex together within the time he fell out of love and we both have the same trauma with getting sexually assaulted so i thought he would never do that to me but he did TWICE he made me have sex with him TWICE because he thought it would make him fall back in love with me and he didn't know how to tell me. i genuinely cant fucking take it anymore i hate him so much i actually cant stand him he left me in the dumps of my mental health for his sexist racist homophobic transphobic friend group. HE BASICALLY TOLD ME " OH NOO UR SUICIDAL WELL IDGAF ANYWAYS HAVE FUN GO TO MY FRIEND GROUP WHO DOESNT GAF ABOUT YOU AND TRY NOT TO CBT WHILE I TALK TO A GIRL YIU WERE SUPER PARANOID ABOUT AND DO EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANTED ME TO SO FOR HER!!!!!" oh yeah btw he left me with his friends that he briefly introduced me too and told me "omggg no they care about u i promise 🥺🥺🥺🥺" LIKE GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE THEY LITERALLY TALK SHIT ABOUT ME TO EACH OTHER WHILE IM CRYING TO THEM. like my fucking bad i was upset about my boyfriend leaving me!!!! but you didn't really need to go to ur little bestie while i'm crying to u and tell them about how i'm obsessed and you feel like a therapist. and tell me why i even ever trusted him and his words he made me feel actually comforted like someone gave a fuck for once but no i find out he was talking shit about me while i was crying to him. and not only that he still treats me like shit and he doesn't try to hide it. i'm actually going to cbt i cant take this anymore i tried to kill my self like an hour ago but i'm so stupid i don't even know how to tie a noose and it kept falling apart. I HATE MY EX SO FUCKING MUCH I HAYE EVERYTHING HES EVER DONE TO ME BUT I JUSY WANT TO BE IN HIS ARMS AGAIN I JUST WANT HIM TO HOLD ME ONE MORE TIME AND TELL ME HE LOVES ME AND EVERYTHINGS GOING TO BE OKAY I FUCKING HATE HIM SO MUCH WHY WOULD HE EVER TELL ME HER CARES THAT HE LOVES ME WHY DOES HE STILL TRY TO GIVE ME FALSE HOPE AFTER WE ALREADY BROKE UP. HE KNOWS WHAT HES DOING HE KNEW WHEN GIRLS WERE FLIRTING WITH HIM AND HE LET THEM FLIRT WITH THEM AND THEN WAS SURPRISED WHEN I GOT UPSET AND INSECURE ESPECIALLY AFTER I LITERALLY HAD TO BEG HIM TO CALL ME PRETTY LIKE R U FUCKING SERIOUS AND THE DOUBLE STANDARDS LIKE HE WOULD GET SOOOOO JELOUS AFTER I TALKED TO ONE GUY WHICH I BARLEY EVER DID BTW BECAUSE IM TERRIFIED OF MEN BECAUSE OF MY TRAUAM i was actually so proud of myself for talking to them and he got all jealous LIKE SHUT THE FUCKING UP JUST BE PROUD OF ME FOR ONCE PLEASE HOLY SHIT. and not only that he was AAAAALLLLLLWAAAYS competing with me LIKE ITS NOT A FUCKING COMPETITION CALM YOUR MAIN CHARACTER Y/N ANIME BOY ASS FUCKING DOWN HOLLLYYY SHIIIIITTTTT. and not only this i'm pretty sure my best friend has a crush on me too so not only am i loosing literally everyone in my life i'm also going to loose my best friend because she has a crush on me and i don't reciprocate it i acrually cant take it anymore i think i'm going to try to cbt if i don't get the role i want for a play that's i'm in cause that's the only thing keeping me rn!!!! sorry if none of this made sense i'm not expecting to see or reply to this but if u read all of this tysm i'm sorry for putting u through that!!!! hopefully this makes someone laugh idk!!!
 

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