diealegend24
Member
- May 11, 2026
- 74
I think a few years back after I had a fight with my brother that's when a part of me began to die.
From 2020 up until now each year life kills a part of me. Now looking back all I've been doing these past couple of years is surviving.
Constantly in this cycle of trying to fix something that's wrong with me. Something I believe is stopping me from living the life I want.
Thing is I've never been able to solve or fix anything despite trying my hardest. Been to therapy, tried to do things in real life to push myself and I have so much fuckin knowledge. But I can't change.
I tried, I really did but shit.
My nervous is still stuck in fight or flight, I still ruminate, OCD themes are still present, my self esteem continues to get worse, and life continues to go to shit in some way shape or form.
I guess you could say this is a vent, I'd typically write this in a journal entry. But I want to know if there are people who relate to me.
I'm just surviving and constantly trying to fix stuff that's wrong with me or making miserable.
When my parents pass away I will relinquish all responsibility for myself and others.
I'll become homeless in a big city. I won't eat, drink or do any necessities to
Keep me alive. I'll just wither away and die on the street.
From 2020 up until now each year life kills a part of me. Now looking back all I've been doing these past couple of years is surviving.
Constantly in this cycle of trying to fix something that's wrong with me. Something I believe is stopping me from living the life I want.
Thing is I've never been able to solve or fix anything despite trying my hardest. Been to therapy, tried to do things in real life to push myself and I have so much fuckin knowledge. But I can't change.
I tried, I really did but shit.
My nervous is still stuck in fight or flight, I still ruminate, OCD themes are still present, my self esteem continues to get worse, and life continues to go to shit in some way shape or form.
I guess you could say this is a vent, I'd typically write this in a journal entry. But I want to know if there are people who relate to me.
I'm just surviving and constantly trying to fix stuff that's wrong with me or making miserable.
When my parents pass away I will relinquish all responsibility for myself and others.
I'll become homeless in a big city. I won't eat, drink or do any necessities to
Keep me alive. I'll just wither away and die on the street.